True Gent Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 It seems that every night I dream about my ex and my current situation. The dreams don't always make much sence, but sometimes they are very accurate regarding how things have ended and the current situation. I always wake up directly after these dreams and they are usually in the early hours of the morning. I thought it was because she was on my mind when going to sleep, but even when I distract myself with reading or watching tv before dropping off to sleep I still dream of her. It's like being haunted by a person that isn't even dead. It's always a bad start to my working day and I'm just sick of it. This is so exhausting, I'm only 2 months into the breakup after 9 years together. The loss of companionship and loss of my best friend is so hard to take. 5
bubblesbursted Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 Exactly! I would want to know that as well. When at what point exactly can I sleep peacfully? And I am sorry to hear about your best friend , I hope you are doing okay
Saurren Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 I only slept 3 hour last night because of insomniac and woke up at 7 and couldn't go back to sleep even though I was dead tired. To top it all off I had a dream of my ex with someone else doing unthinkable things.
MoooOinkBaaa Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 Nearly six months for me and I still have them. They started dying down after four months. The less you think about them during the days the less you dream of them.
Author True Gent Posted January 28, 2014 Author Posted January 28, 2014 It's always good to hear other people are experiencing these things. Getting it out on these forums is a comfort. I guess we'll all get there eventually. 1
HeartinPain Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 They are very frustrating! I started getting dreams of the ex 4 months post BU when I finally started sleeping more than 3 hours a night! They are mostly nightmares. I wish they would go away!
John83 Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 Still having them now every night almost a month since breakin up. Always dreamed in great detail and they have always felt so real. They are always of happy times, family days out with kids and such. Its heartbreaking when you wake up and realise they arent real. Hope it gets better for you
Itspointless Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 'f you are having nightmares after the recent tragedy (or any other trauma), be assured it’s a natural reaction. Whenever people feel threatened and anxious, their minds try to cope with the situation. Having nightmares is actually a good sign that you are struggling to make sense of the horrific situation. It’s the brain’s way of attempting to accept the unacceptable.' (Nightmares After Trauma | CreativeDreaming.org) 1
FortunateSon Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I am almost 8 months post break up and while I don't dream of her much anymore(that I remember anyway), I still wake up early thinking about her often. Needless to say this is not how I want to start my day!!
LostConfused123 Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I had one a couple nights ago that the polar caps melted, we were holding hands and got engulfed by the huge waves and water. . . . but we were able to breathe and live under water. . we just went on as usual???? Weird!!!! I'm 3 months post break up. NC the same. I thought these dreams were behind me as it's been a while. . I guess not. The nice thing is I didn't wake up and cry, well not much. Best of luck!!
Redhawkk Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I feel you. I seem to fall asleep easily enough, but I wake up wishing she was with me and thinking about her. My girlfriend and I broke up maybe a week ago(even though we never actually said those words, long story) and I'm still trying to forget about her. we were together for three years practically, and I know what it feels to lose a best friend that you shared everything with. But hang in there and vent your emotions here, I come here almost everyday since my break up and I'm so glad I have people here to share all this with. 1
Author True Gent Posted January 29, 2014 Author Posted January 29, 2014 Thanks for sharing all your experiences too guys. I'm pleased I'm not alone in this, I feel now that my friends in the real world just don't get it. This forum is a good place to let off a little steam with the pleasure of knowing that you all know what it feels like. 1
fixing Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 True Gent you are doing remarkably well for 2 months after a 9 year relationship walks out on you! Unreal progress, seriously. Most people would go and bury themselves into alcohol and lose their jobs and let their life completely crumble in your shoes. Your winning this war! Keep it up. And to everyone else here to. Its a struggle and its a fight that you must win! Dont let those ex's dictate your life. They broke your heart, but you will mend and come out twice as strong as them. Dont let the bastards grind you down. 1
JDPT Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I'm at 8 or 9 months post BU and I still get them. The difference is that they are no longer painful. I wake up in the morning remembering the dream but it usually takes me no more than a minute to get over it.
k10k Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I had 3 vivid nightmares last night - 2 involving the end of the world, and 1 involving me riding away from my ex on a bicycle and him feeling guilty and chasing me Woke up at 2am feeling very out of sorts. Hang in there True Gent.
Conners Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 Yep.. I get them too. Sometimes they don't make much sense but I wish they would stop all together.
bubblesbursted Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 True Gent you are doing great! And of course you arent alone om this. Here everyone understands what you are going through. Yesterday I had a dream about my ex. I was on a vaccation with my family (impossible) but I was and he wasnt there physicallt but we were constantly texting like any regular couple. It was nice dream but I woke only to realise what a jerk he was.
StringsAttached Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 The more you think about your ex the more you will dream bout them simple as. Before sleeping instead of doting on your loser ex read a book or listen to a happy song. I do this every night and haven't dreamt of them since yesterday. 1
ayudorama Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 ^I wish that was the case. I'm 10 months BU and I have days where I don't even have thoughts of him. All's well and dandy until one unfortunate night, I dream of him and that just sets off more thoughts in the day. Dreams are such curious things.
Monopoly Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 The more you think about your ex the more you will dream bout them simple as. That is true. I thought of her a lot yesterday and ended up having a dream about her. Or rather a nightmare: she died in front of me and I couldn't do anything, man that was terrible. It just made me realize that I will always care about her but also that life is too short to always feel sad. 1
FortunateSon Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 My ex told me while we were still in contact a couple weeks after BU that she had a nightmare about me where I was murdered by a serial killer...I wonder what that meant!!
StringsAttached Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 ^I wish that was the case. I'm 10 months BU and I have days where I don't even have thoughts of him. All's well and dandy until one unfortunate night, I dream of him and that just sets off more thoughts in the day. Dreams are such curious things. It is very curious. When they say dreams come true, they do, it's not something optimists and successful people have conjured in order to make you feel better. Perhaps your subconscious was trying to tell you something. I had a dream about my ex while we were friends that she had found another after sending me a poem/rap she wrote. 2 months later, she started seeing a hip-hop beat producer. Dreams really are strange things. lol 1
Author True Gent Posted January 29, 2014 Author Posted January 29, 2014 I just want to thank you all for your posts in this thread. My internet access is Pretty limited at the moment as I'm in the process of moving house (thank God, goodbye to the memories) These forums really are a great comfort, thanks guys. Hopefully these dreams will help with the healing. It really is tough right now. Good luck to us all! 2
Better Posted January 29, 2014 Posted January 29, 2014 I've been divorced for many years and have had a few long relationships since with other women, but I only ever dream about my ex-wife. I suspect it has something to do with how long we were a part of each others' lives. It doesn't bother me anymore since we would both agree that we will never be together again, but it's still curious that I would dream about her.
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