Am I in the wrong?

[Alexa95]

So basically I have made someone very depressed and although I feel guilty, I'm not sure exactly what I've done wrong.

I'm 18, in sixth form, and a couple of months ago I started getting a lot closer with this guy, also my age (let's call him Joe). I suppose I knew he liked me quite a lot, he would walk me home, which I found a little annoying, and we went out twice on casual dates. He kissed me. After the second date we dent talk that much in school and began to drift apart. Although he was

very nice I never really liked Joe as more than a friend and I definitely did not see us as anything near a couple.

Last weekend I went to someone's house party and flirted a lot with a friend (let's call him chris) I've always found very attractive but assumed he wasn't really interested in me. We ended up kissing.

The next morning Joe texted me saying (for the first time) that he really liked me - I think he had found out about chris and I - I very politely and kindly told him I didn't really see him that way. Meanwhile chris and I decided to stay more than friends.

What I didn't expect was that Joe became very depressed - he is acting like he was in love with me or something and I broke his heart which is ridiculous - he seems like he hates me and I know he hates Chris (they are/were fairly good friends.

Am in in the wrong? I feel awful for turning Joe down but he's makin me feel like I've done something terrible when we literally only went out twice. Should I break it off with chris and get together with Joe when Im not attracted to him at all?

[MrMeh]

You shouldn't feel guilty about anything. You were not leading anybody

on and you weren't using anybody selfishly.

[soccerrprp]

Well, it would have helped if you made it clear when you went out with him(joe) that you were JUST FRIENDS and didn't see him "that" way. Other than that, it's not your fault. You didn't do anything wrong and joe is over-reacting.

[ExpatInItaly]

To be honest, I think you should've been clearer with the first guy that you weren't interested in him romantically. Going on dates, even so-called "casual" ones, sends mixed signals. He very likely didn't interpret them that way. Next time, don't agree to a date with someone you're not interested in.

 

However, because you haven't really spoken much since the second date, I'd assume he got the hint that you weren't into it. It's not your fault that he feels the way he does. You're free to date whomever you choose. He is a big boy. It hurts now, but he will get over it sooner or later.