conmorse Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Lately I've been thinking about my ex a lot. It's been 2.5 post breakup and I've been pretty much in No contact ever since. I've removed and hid all the photos I have of me and her, but I still have old text conversations. I haven't looked at it since the break up. I don't know why, but I want to read them. I know I should delete it as it serves no purpose, but i can't seem to get myself to do it. I've just been dwelling so much on what happened the past few days, can I get some words of wisdom and encouragement LS?
Haydn Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Delete. Less to dwell on. Do it in the next 5 minutes. Keep going. Lately I've been thinking about my ex a lot. It's been 2.5 post breakup and I've been pretty much in No contact ever since. I've removed and hid all the photos I have of me and her, but I still have old text conversations. I haven't looked at it since the break up. I don't know why, but I want to read them. I know I should delete it as it serves no purpose, but i can't seem to get myself to do it. I've just been dwelling so much on what happened the past few days, can I get some words of wisdom and encouragement LS? 2
JDPT Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 It will take you no time to delete these messages. On the other hand, the pain will linger for a while if you do decide to read them. I'm certain this is something you already realized yourself but it's time to start thinking about yourself and no one else. There is absolutely nothing to look back to, allow the past to remain stagnant in time.
bubblesbursted Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Lately I've been thinking about my ex a lot. It's been 2.5 post breakup and I've been pretty much in No contact ever since. I've removed and hid all the photos I have of me and her, but I still have old text conversations. I haven't looked at it since the break up. I don't know why, but I want to read them. I know I should delete it as it serves no purpose, but i can't seem to get myself to do it. I've just been dwelling so much on what happened the past few days, can I get some words of wisdom and encouragement LS? You and I are on the same boat. But I think the best would be deleting the texts and chats , I know its hard but you will have to. It will get better , I promise
ithappenedagain Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Definitely not a good idea. The old cliche of opening a wound comes to mind here. Why go back in time if you are not over them yet? I deleted all of my texts from her the night she told me her decision was final. I am guilty of reading the farewell email I sent her over and over and over again. It makes me feel better that I was able to tell her my thoughts and feelings. I am also guilty of hoping that she has been reading the email I sent, but as I mentioned earlier, false hope makes a bad heart. Anyways, delete those messages asap. It will only make you feel worse and question things. Hang in there 1
erklat Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 I think you should delete them. I haven't done so. At least I know I healed the hard way.
mirage12 Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Delete them before you give in to temptation. I've read the old texts, Facebook messages, emails before because I desperately missed her. All it does is make you feel the loss worse than before...and it also makes you remember thoughts/memories you didn't even think about before reading. For your own sake, save yourself from that because the feeling after is far worse than what you're feeling now.
AnyaNova Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 I'm not a fan of deleting them. You might want them later. But just don't look at them until you are truly ready. I just accidentally landed on some old OKC chats from my ex. Maybe felt a tiny twinge but I'm quite fine after reading them. But it has been close to 6 months for me. 1
HeartinPain Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Delete it! Don't torture yourself! It doesn't change the situation and will just bring you pain!
deathandtaxes Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 Keep the photos. Keep the texts. It's part of your story. Maybe read them one day when it no longer hurts to contemplate doing so. 1
MoooOinkBaaa Posted January 26, 2014 Posted January 26, 2014 I didn't want to delete photos either so I put them on an SD card and threw the card into my loft - it would take more effort than it's worth to climb up there and get the card. Maybe I'll climb up there one day in the future or maybe I'll forget all about them. 4
Amaury Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 Just delete them. I deleted all our convos and pictures after we broke up and I didnt regret it. Then a few weeks ago I had to go thro some old emails for a resume and I came across some of our convos I didnt read them all but I skimmed thro one or two and it just got me sad because of how drastic things have changed so I deleted them and then I went out of my way to go to my dropbox and delete our back up pics, it got me a little sad again but I realized it was never real and now I feel like I lifted this heavy weight off my shoulders. I feel better and with time I won't even remember what her face looks like.
Author conmorse Posted January 27, 2014 Author Posted January 27, 2014 I decided to dig up old photos I hid and put away after the break up, and immediately the tears came. I know this pain was self inflected, Im not sure why I put myself through it. Ive been in NC for 2 months and every day it's been getting harder and harder. I drive myself crazy of wondering what she's doing, what shes up to, etc etc. Sigh...
jphcbpa Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 feel your pain. did you discard the photos or do you still have them? what is your plan if you are keeping them? 1
fixing Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 Its a mistake. You know that. Just think of tomorrow as day 1 of nc. Bin the photos now. You will come through this, just no more setbacks! Stay strong
Author conmorse Posted January 27, 2014 Author Posted January 27, 2014 feel your pain. did you discard the photos or do you still have them? what is your plan if you are keeping them? I don't want to delete them or throw them away as of right now. I want to hide them or keep them in a place where I can look back at them again when I'm healed and be able to appreciate the memories. I know its unfortunate that I cracked and decided to dig them up today, but i know now.
jphcbpa Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 I don't want to delete them or throw them away as of right now. I want to hide them or keep them in a place where I can look back at them again when I'm healed and be able to appreciate the memories. I know its unfortunate that I cracked and decided to dig them up today, but i know now. have a friend hold onto them
EuTuBrute Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 I was cleaning out my closet and i found a birthday card from my ex gf...saying that i love you more and more every day and you will always be my first and only true love Its has been about 10 months post BU, and let me tell you it hurts... It hurts mostly because how can a person be so in love with you at one point and discard you like you meant nothing the next. 1
deathandtaxes Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 I don't want to delete them or throw them away as of right now. I want to hide them or keep them in a place where I can look back at them again when I'm healed and be able to appreciate the memories. I know its unfortunate that I cracked and decided to dig them up today, but i know now. The pain is all part of the healing. Don't delete them. Don't throw them away. Just keep resisting the urge to look at them longer and longer. And then one day, there won't be an urge. And then another day, you can look back fondly at the photos and feel no pain. At that point, you will thank your past self for not deleting the photos. 2
Thedafox Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 I deleted all the pictures I had of my ex and I about 3 days after we broke up and I immensely regret it.
jphcbpa Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 get rid of the old so you can bring in the new you will always have the memories in your mind.
forgetmenot75 Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 Don't delete anything. Just lock them where you can't see them in daily basis. Just you know, 2/3 months mark is the worst period of no contact. If you can keep no contact, you'll feel immensely better in one month. Just stay strong 1
Author conmorse Posted January 27, 2014 Author Posted January 27, 2014 Don't delete anything. Just lock them where you can't see them in daily basis. Just you know, 2/3 months mark is the worst period of no contact. If you can keep no contact, you'll feel immensely better in one month. Just stay strong I don't know if looking at pictures counts as breaking no contact. I still haven't spoken to her and deleted her off social media since day one. I can definitely feel the difficulty of the 2-3 month of NC. It's almost as if reality is finally settling and I don't want to forget or let go..hence why i looked at the pictures...
Carly Lou Posted January 27, 2014 Posted January 27, 2014 I've cleared my hard drive out and uploaded all the photos/emails/documents/texts etc to dropbox so they are still there, but not in my face on the computer anymore, that's helped a bit. Stay strong x
Recommended Posts