Lonelyandsad31 Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 (edited) I had a stroke 3 years ago, the problems started then ( he says they start before then) while still in the hospital I didn't deal with having a stroke I thought one day I would just get up an walk, talk right and use my arm. I told my husband just to go find a girlfriend ( I knew things where gonna be doomed) he of course didn't. I came home and starting walking, talking an being able to use my arm a little, how ever the stroke left my body feeling odd(I didn't like to b touched. So of course I wouldn't let my husband touch me. Things did get better with my body after awhile but I couldn't get over having a stroke I was so different, I gained a bunch 40 pounds. We weren't having sex, we couldn't talk. I was opposite than what I once was, I still could not except it. I be came jealous, negative and would go get help, I still thought it was going to get better on its own. I stopped doing things with my family I just stayed home an distant my self. I live in the middle of now where town is 15 miles away. I did do important things with my family just not everyday things. I couldn't do my hair my makeup and I was thicker than before. I still didn't get medicine. I accused my husband of cheating all the time. He was no angel in all this. He pulled away also, but still acted like he loved me. I threw fits every 6 months r so leave, kids would cry and he told me the last time I did this he wasn't going to let let me come back, 3 years later he would work a lot of hours so he said he wasn't getting paid for it and always had a excuse for not getting paid an when he wasn't "working" he did come home till 2 ( he said he was hunting he did like to hunt at night) one weekend before our split we didn't have no kids (which is rare)he didn't want to anything with me he was always working then one night he came home an wanted to go for a drive, so I got in his truck(it was cold, he had a jacket on the floor board ) I grapped it a covered my legs, he freaked out jumped out of the truck grapped another jacket put it on the floor bored, I was like what r u hiding . He stayed nothing we got in a huge fight I ended up getting out the truck, he left. Then one might I came in the kitchen an he was texting so I said who's that, I went to look. He covered the phone an turned it off. I flipped an demand the phone. He put it in his pocket an threw a fit about prince able. I let it go. then one weekend a week before his birthday he said he wanted to go ice skating with our 2 daughters, I wanted to go he made every excuse in the book for me not to go and our oldest daughter (15). I dropped it an let him go. While there I told him to send me a pic he did but it was him with the girls. I thought that was odd, but over looked it (cause I could freak out about nothing my stroke messed me up at times) then I asked him if he wanted dinner when he got home he told me no, he would just go drive threw, he came home around 9:30. When my girls came in the first thing they said was guess who was there... M***, (the girl I accused him of liking) so I went outside an flipped out on him. He told me it was no big deal she just happened to n there with her kids an a bunch of family an her seperated husband, so I let it go. Went back inside an my daughter was acting wierd so I pulled her into the room an asked her if she was ok, she then !told me they went to dinner with this lady an kids. I asked her if the other husband was there she said no, so I went outside pissed how !dare him he went to dinner with another female! He ended up leaving for the night came home around 4 ish I waited till 9 to wake him up, I told him we need to talk things blew up and I ended packing my stuff an left( he would have took my kids away if I stayed) evi so I left so my kids ,could be home. I had no where to go no family only his no friend only his, his mother let me stay at her house for a week he ended up leaving so I could stay at the house. We now our seperated(not legally) he won't talk to me says there is nothing to discus. He told the kid we weren't getting a divorce just need a break. So I have started working out (already lost 15 pounds) applied for jobs( I don't even know if I can work) I am taking care of myself, showering doing my make up an hair. When he comes over to pick up kids I'm polite and cheerful an don't ask him anything about our marriage. I guess my question is there hope for us? I don't want to give up on my marriage. I do love him very much! Want to slowly work things out, start fresh. I have no one, im scared, lost, wishful, not wishful. I'm a mess. Edited January 26, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Author Lonelyandsad31 Posted January 25, 2014 Author Posted January 25, 2014 I am alittle messed from the stroke, am on meds for my depression. I know he loved me.
iworthmore Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 sorry to know abr ur stroke. ull be better. no one can blame you for being in a mess and doing things u did. its not easy having a stroke. but u will get thru it. get ur life back on track. do what ur doctor says. lose the weight u gained. i know many ppl had a stroke and they live normal and happy. u can function normal after a stroke. so its not the end of the world. and u still the same . do it for urself, ur kids and for him. no one wants to live with depressed partner. again, its not easy and cant blame u. but u must be strong enough to get ur life back. i think u have a chance, improve ur life and health regardless of winning him back or not. but i think it can help. wish u health and cheerful upcoming days.
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