Shufflin Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 As a guy in his late 20's who has gone through life with mediocre success with women I would like to do better. If there is one thing you could advise a struggling guy what would it be? Mine would be to put more effort in being social.
Frank2thepoint Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 What do you mean by mediocre success with women?
Author Shufflin Posted January 24, 2014 Author Posted January 24, 2014 What do you mean by mediocre success with women? Well from birth-27 I have only had two gfs. Each lasting roughly a year. I spent most of my time unhappily single. Also, very little success when single. Every success, even the small ones, are often preceded and followed by many failures.
D.Mc. Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 What you deem failures may just be basic incompatibility with the other people, & that's going to happen. If that's the case then you shouldn't be with the person, if there is incompatibility either mentally, physically or emotionally. You may want it to work but it just won't. These failures can help focus your insight into what it is you really want from any relationship you have, personal, professional & socially. I do agree that being more social is a help in dispelling the feeling that "I"ll never find someone" (if that's what you're having now). If you do "OLD" look for sites like "How about We" where you can actually suggest an activity to go out & do. You may find someone else's suggested activity so much fun that you totally forget about the pressure of dating. I felt very lonely in my 20's when all my friends were married or dating when I wasn't. It's not fun but it will pass.
Frank2thepoint Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 Well from birth-27 I have only had two gfs. Each lasting roughly a year. I spent most of my time unhappily single. Also, very little success when single. Every success, even the small ones, are often preceded and followed by many failures. You have the wrong attitude. You need work on turning that frown into a smile. I'm 34, had only three girlfriends, but have dated a decent amount of women. Been single for over six years. I'm alone, but not lonely. I have hobbies, I have friends, I keep myself occupied. If I get an opportunity to chat with a woman, I take it and try to ask her out. I get rejected a lot, but oh well, that's life of being a man. I don't let it depress me or hold me down. You are placing too much stock into relationships. You can't have this insatiable yearning to be with a woman, because a woman cannot bring you happiness. A woman should complement you, not rule you. Same advice goes to women that feel they can't function without a man. You have to find that happiness within yourself. Self-content, self-respect, self-esteem. Once you achieve this, there is no more success or failure. There is only truth. What that truth is for you, is for you to discover. 1
d0nnivain Posted January 25, 2014 Posted January 25, 2014 Be friendly. A 'hello', a smile & a genuine interest in the other person will get you farther than all the lines in the world.
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