Orangecrush55 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Its the whole story so Ive tried to break it up so that its easier to read. I appreciate you guys reading through it. So I tried OLD for the first time the other day. I ran across this really interesting woman and decided to send her a message. She replied and we started to get to know each other for a little bit. Things were going well and she seemed even more interesting after learning about her a little bit so I decided to give her my number and told her that I would like to get to know her a little more and that she should text me. Next thing you know, my phone went off and it was a text from her telling me it was her from the site. We texted for about a day or so and we decided to meet up for drinks. Probably about a day after that we went out last sunday night for drinks. The conversation went well from what I thought. ALthough most of questions you would normally ask we had already discussed over text. We had stayed up till about 5am the day we exchanged numbers texting. Anyways after a few drink and a few hours of talking we decided to leave. We hugged goodbye and she said we should do it again sometime and I agreed. She texted me about a minute after leaving just having casual conversation and it kind of died off. Then later that night maybe about an hour or so after I had got home she sent me a text asking if I was awake and if I wanted to come over to her place. She said she had been drinking some alone and wanted me to come over and have some more with her. It was pretty late and I had work the next day so I told her sure but joked to not be upset if I seemed tired, which her response was that I could just stay over which kind of took me off guard but I went with it. She sent me her address and info and told me to text her when I got up and around enough to head that way and that she would leave the door unlocked if I was coming. Once I did get to that point I texted her to let her know and never heard a response back. After waiting for 20 mins or so I texted her, figuring she fell asleep, that since it was late and that she probably had passed out we should do it some other night and told her goodnight. Felt bad I told her I was coming so she unlocked the door but I wasnt about to show up and just walk into someones place that Ive only known for two days. The next morning I never heard anything....So I texted her and she replied that she in fact did fall asleep and she apologized for being "annoying" but I assured her she wasnt and we agreed once again that we would do drinks and watch netflix at her house another time. Thats about all I heard back. I have tried texting and asking about how her day was or work trying to start up a conversation but she only replies back with things like "long lol" and doesnt really throw out anything else to conversate back with. I dont know if shes just lost interest or if I should even keep texting or trying to plan another get together.
TXGuy Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 My guess is she was embarrassed the next day. She might think she came across slutty and now doesn't want to see you again. Ironically, she would have been more likely to see you again if you actually slept with her. 2
Author Orangecrush55 Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 So what should my next steps be?
MixedUpChick Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 It sounds like after spending time with you, she was horny & thought you were safe enough to have over for sex. Since she'd been drinking & fell asleep before you got there, I agree with TXGuy that she was probably feeling embarrassed by her behavior in the light of day. You can keep trying but if it's been days, it doesn't sound like she's going to get over it, you may have to just move on. Have you tried to set up another actual date with her? You can always try, she might agree to it.
Author Orangecrush55 Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 I could see where she felt embaressed. But thats why I clearly stated that it was not the slightest annoying the way she was texting the night before like she called it and even saying we should plan a night to get together like planned.
Thegreatestthing Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 People who one write word replies and lol,don't care in the slightest what you are saying and therefore are not engaging with you. Delete,next. 2
antonio1149 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 My general rule is, if I extend myself and you don't respond, you're done. MAYBE, if I think you're EXTRA SPECIAL, I try a second time. If I get anything less than a very enthusiastic response and a firm commitment for whatever the next step is, you're history. Don't bother wracking your brains to figure out what went out wrong--there could be all sorts of reasons and you may never know. Welcome to online dating. 3
PegNosePete Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 What antonio said. One woman gets one chance. If she rejects you, or sends a one-word reply, the ball is in her court. If she doesn't return it then she's not interested, move on.
Aquanut Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Forget any ideas of having a relationship with her, but if you want drunk sex, text her and invite yourself over when you think she is likely to have been drinking. Make sure to say you have a bottle of something that you're bringing. I doubt she will agree to meet you when she's sober. She's embarrassed and knows you will expect her to put out if you meet again. And that's not something she's willing to accept in herself when she's sober. If you are smart you will just move on. Next! 3
Frank2thepoint Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 My general rule is, if I extend myself and you don't respond, you're done. MAYBE, if I think you're EXTRA SPECIAL, I try a second time. If I get anything less than a very enthusiastic response and a firm commitment for whatever the next step is, you're history. What antonio said. One woman gets one chance. If she rejects you, or sends a one-word reply, the ball is in her court. If she doesn't return it then she's not interested, move on. I approve of these messages. They resound truth. Cold, hard, yet liberating truth. To iterate what others said, she sobered up and was embarrassed at her text. There's no point in hounding her with more texts. Besides, you should be contemplating what kind of quality this girl is if she drinks by herself and sends out texts asking for sex after barely knowing someone. Sounds like an unstable person to me. 2
shinealight Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 When someone is intrested in you they make it out of there way to show it, text you all the time, cant stop looking at you ect.
avoforastig Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 I wouldn't worry about it too much. Women can be particularly fickle with dating, especially online dating. I had a similar experience with a chuck like that. I hate to break it to you but she probably is a bit unstable. If you are just looking to hook up it might be worth a go. If not, I'd ask her explicitly for another date at a time and place that are convenient for her. One successful tip I read is catering to your date's convenience to improve the likelihood they will accept and commit to the date. For example, say something like: We should get together for a drink, what is your schedule like this week? Assuming she replies with a few dates/times, choose a location that is close to where she lives and tailor it to her preference if you know about her interests. Again, if you know she likes wine, go to a wine bar not the lcal sports bar. People tend to accept invitations that present minimal roadblocks and peak their interest. This strategy is incredibly successful for me. Good luck. If she blows you off, don't waste your time man. The internet is loaded with any type of woman you can imagine. Keep in mind there are tons of single women everywhere and you shouldn't have to force things. I will tell you flaky women are a waste of time and typically will use you if they don't have a better offer at the moment.
emva07 Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 I'd say don't text her again, she's lost interest. What stood out to me (and I might be misinterpreting what you wrote) is that YOU had to text her for her to tell you she fell asleep. And yes, people who only with "lol" and short answers aren't interested.
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