Devildog Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 A nice guy wouldn't have a one night stand with a woman who was looking for more than meaningless sex.
Zoot Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Therein lies the problem: HIS meaningless sex was HER relationship. I don't blame the guy involved for that one. Then again, I'm a conservative moralist with no education.
Devildog Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Then she has some deep issues if she thinks sleeping with a guy on the first date is going to lead to a relationship.
Adunaphel Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by Devildog Here is a question for all you women who look for "nice, deep guys". Which method do you think will get me more phone numbers, if I am sitting in a bar or a club reading Plato, or if I have tossed back a few beers and am out there hootin and hollerin and making a spectacle of myself? If you sit reading Plato in a bar or club you'll look like a showoff. Zoot, Honesty can be very painful. Try telling someone , as this thread suggested, that she was ugly but you boned her anyway. It's not one of life's better moments. But if you tell someone *before* (not after!) that all you'd like to do is having sex with her because you don't find her enough attractive to have a relationship with her, at least she'll know what she's up for, and she might -hopefully- decide to stay away from you. It's just fair. I don't think that people suggesting honesty had VB's interest at heart - they cared about the girl.
Devildog Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by Adunaphel If you sit reading Plato in a bar or club you'll look like a showoff. Adunaphel, where I am at, if you sit anywhere reading anything beyond the TV guide you look like a showoff.
Adunaphel Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by Devildog Adunaphel, where I am at, if you sit anywhere reading anything beyond the TV guide you look like a showoff.
katie79 Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 I'm going to say one last note on this thread and leave you with something to think about. It's not about "the looks" altogether, it's about liking "the package". And believe me, if you are someone who finds yourself unattractive, looks is 50% appearance and 50% attitude. It' s not "looks", it is rather who you are, how you carry yourself, and what you've got.
alphamale Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by katie79 It' s not "looks", it is rather who you are, how you carry yourself, and what you've got. To an extent, I agreee, KATIE79. But physically attractive people get a lot from our society. Studies have been done that reveal that physically attractive people of both sexes generally have better happiness and success and mental and emotional health. It is the whole package. Looks, personality, intelligence, moral fiber, etc... but the LOOKS get you in the door. Good looking people get a lot of opportunities in every area of life that avg looking people do not.
heartburn Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 How did the date go? Did you get the sex you needed? Beauty is skin deep. Her personality along can make her outta appearance striking.
moimeme Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Heartburn, read the thread. my opinion based on my observations on what is obviously your area of expertise. Opinions mean squat if they're based on misconceptions or plain bad information. Somehow, people seem to have decided that 'opinions' are sacrosanct. All they are is uneducated guesses. If you want to understand the world, you'll go farther than to just make a few observations and draw conclusions based on them, because you then fail to take into account all the things which might skew your observations so that you make the wrong conclusions. If you actually want to know how the world works, you need to seek out actual information; for instance studies where people are surveyed for their attitudes. What you think you see is not necessarily what's happening and if you think you understand then you fail to account for the fact that you cannot percieve the entirety of the situation. I have zero faith in my 'opinion' about anything because it's an impression. If I want to have genuine understanding about what goes on in the world, I look for information that confirms or disputes my 'opinion'. In short, I aim to have educated opinions so that I don't live my life based on mistaken impressions and misunderstandings. IMHO, 'opinions' which are uninformed are useless. Based on your heated denial of the existence of the possibility or that it ever happens, I have to wonder if you feel some degree of guilt for having crushed a few nice guys yourself. Not in the least. I have a policy of not even befriending fellows that I know I won't be interested in unless I'm positive they'll never be interested back. The ones I will make friends of who might possibly be interested are ones that I am interested in back so that if they made a move, I'd go along. I am actively avoiding being friends with a few guys right now because I know they don't just want to be friends, including a couple of married guys. In fact, that raises a question I'll ask elsewhere. But no, I have the utmost respect for people's hearts and therefore I do my best not to let anyone become fond of me if I won't be able to return the regard.
whichwayisup Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 But physically attractive people get a lot from our society. Studies have been done that reveal that physically attractive people of both sexes generally have better happiness and success and mental and emotional health. HMMM well, you ever look at George Bush?? You think HE is good looking? From a females point of view - I personally think he isn't. I understand what you're saying here but at the same time CONFIDENCE is a huge key. I remember waaay back in grade 9. I didn't have much confidence, shy and stuff...There was this one girl, who really wasn't nice - she was quite large and not so good looking either! BUT she was SO popular! Alot of the guys went out with her (no she didn't put out!) and it would piss me off because I wonder wtf was wrong with ME??!!! I was nice, giving (not sexually ) and fun....I just had no self confidence and she did. People wanted to be around her cuz she had a powerful strong energy about her. Ugly or not, people thrive and get what they want because they work their tales off. You can't go on looks forever...Looks fade after a while. Personalities don't.
alphamale Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by whichwayisup I understand what you're saying here but at the same time CONFIDENCE is a huge key. ....I just had no self confidence and she did. People wanted to be around her cuz she had a powerful strong energy about her. People get their confidence from many things. Maybe their looks, their personality, their intelligence or from being born into a wealthy family. Everyone is different in this respect but when it comes to looks, most attractive people have it a bit easier than everyone else.
georgeb Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by whichwayisup HMMM well, you ever look at George Bush?? You think HE is good looking? From a females point of view - I personally think he isn't.
rachael Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 i think its really shallow that you actually care what other people think dont you have a mind of your own and have you conciderd what ahe feels if its that bad you should of said no at the start but insted your leading some1 into faulse hope. thats nasty
whichwayisup Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 most attractive people have it a bit easier than everyone else. Agreed 100% But people with money have it good too, ugly or not! (Sorry Dubya! )
Devildog Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 All they are is uneducated guesses. A fact is something that can be proven beyond a shadow of a doubt. All else is opinion. Educated guesses are opinions too. And yes, a persons opinion is sancrosanct. At least in America where we have the right to our own opinion and have the freedom to voice those opinions. You might disagree with my opinions, you are free to try to change my opinions, but you may not classify me as an idiot or fool just because my opinion is different than yours. If you actually want to know how the world works, you need to seek out actual information; for instance studies where people are surveyed for their attitudes. What you think you see is not necessarily what's happening and if you think you understand then you fail to account for the fact that you cannot percieve the entirety of the situation. Do you know my life experiences? I base my opinions on them to a large extent. And even though I am "only" 30 I have done alot of living in those 30 years. More than most people do with 75 years. So no, I am not some poor rube who never left a one horse town making observations based on Jimmy Bob Ray and Betty Joe Sue's relationship. This is based on observations that took place on 3 continents and in over a dozen different countries. But silly me, wasting my time living instead of reading some study where they try to justify the answer they already decided was correct. "Feelings" and "attitudes" are not something that can be scientifically proven. How often have you expressed your true feelings rather than what someone wants to hear? If you say never you are probably full of crap. So how much honest trust can you put into those studies? It is no different than religion. You believe what you are told because there is no verifiable fact to base it on. I have zero faith in my 'opinion' about anything because it's an impression. So why are you trying to ram your opinion down our throats as some sort of "scientific fact"?
tiki Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by Devildog making observations based on Jimmy Bob Ray and Betty Joe Sue's relationship Hey! You know my cousins?!
moimeme Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 So why are you trying to ram your opinion down our throats as some sort of "scientific fact"? Um. I'm not. I'm saying that your bitterness is based on anecdotal evidence and does not represent the world as it actually is according to folks who have done research to prove or disprove the very assumptions you live by. I'm saying the evidence is contrary to your opinion. However you're welcome to continue believing what you like and to say it as often as you like. However, I think your life would be happier if you changed the assumptions and that's why I'm trying to persuade you to do so by seeking out information which proves that your assumptions are incorrect. Bitterness and cynicism chew up your insides, ruin your attitude, and leave a little aura of unpleasantness around you. I suggest that's not the best way to go about finding the sort of woman you say you want but, hey, why listen to me. Your method is clearly working for you, right?
Devildog Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 I'm saying that your bitterness is based on anecdotal evidence and does not represent the world as it actually is according to folks who have done research to prove or disprove the very assumptions you live by. Did you read my post? Did you miss the part about my experiences being based on observations from locations all around the world? Or was that little factoid contrary to your assumption and therefore tossed aside in your conclusion? I suggest that's not the best way to go about finding the sort of woman you say you want Really? Because being a faithful, devoted husband and father, treating my wife like a queen, and always being there to help her any time she needed it got me where? Oh yeah, it got me tossed aside so she could go bang her high school crush who stopped calling her and avoided her after he got into her pants. But that is just anecdotal evidence, not something verifiable or concrete.
moimeme Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Cripes. Do you know what 'anecdotal evidence' means? Your one story with one woman or even your twenty stories with twenty women does NOT represent the rest of the hundred-plus million women in your nation not to mention the several billion women on the planet. That you insist on believing it does is the problem. Anyway. I've done what I can. Carry on. And good luck.
Devildog Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme Cripes. Do you know what 'anecdotal evidence' means? Your one story with one woman or even your twenty stories with twenty women does NOT represent the rest of the hundred-plus million women in your nation not to mention the several billion women on the planet. That you insist on believing it does is the problem. Anyway. I've done what I can. Carry on. And good luck. Yes,I know what anecdotal evidence means. I just don't see how it is that my "anecdotal evidence" is less valid than the "scientific proof" based on a small study group in which they were analyzing "feelings" which cannot be scientifically proven. How is that any more representative than my observations of people from all over the world? I would think my "study group" was more diverse than some government funded University study composed of college kids.
alphamale Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme Cripes. Do you know what 'anecdotal evidence' means? Your one story with one woman or even your twenty stories with twenty women does NOT represent the rest of the hundred-plus million women in your nation not to mention the several billion women on the planet. It is human nature to take one's experience(s) with a few individuals and extrapolate it to the masses.
iamwalrus Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 OMG how are there all of these replies for this poll... what is it, 98? i havn't gotten past ten in my posts.... ???????
Devildog Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 This one makes 170 something. Simple, just post a controversial topic and watch the debate unfold. Kind of like politics really. You can get some long posts on that subject alone.
alphamale Posted January 14, 2005 Posted January 14, 2005 Originally posted by Devildog This one makes 170 something. Simple, just post a controversial topic and watch the debate unfold. Kind of like politics really. You can get some long posts on that subject alone. Yes DD, a few wks back I posted a topic on bad boys and why women love them and that one racked up 200+ posts within 24 hrs. Controversy is the key.
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