Keenly Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 (edited) There are always a few things I keep seeing that are just utterly laughable. Let's have some fun and share some common or obscure ridiculous things we have all seen in profiles. Here are some of my favorites; Money or shopping listed as an interest or hobby " I'm a country girl " with the obligatory " I'm holding a gun " photo ( this is 90% of my choices , all of these " Sacramento country girls " ) The one or two sentence profiles. Usually " hi! Message me if you are interested !" The disclaimers (the " I dont usually do this " or " my friends made this for me " The ten page long list of requirements or disqualifications ( I want to know about you, not go down a checklist evaluating myself ) Da iz talkn lik diz cuz Im 2 cool 4 u The classic " I don't play games " ( who is going to admit they do ? ) The Marilyn Monroe quotes ( gag ) Those are a few recurring cliches that make me cringe. I'm actually very interested to hear the ladies experiences with men's profiles. Wait I can't forget ! " I want a man, not a boy " Edited January 23, 2014 by Keenly 1
Lady2163 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 What is the Marilyn Monroe quotes? Profiles that turn me off I love hunting, fishing, camping and NASCAR. I am a huge football, basketball, baseball fan and then list all the teams they follow...when do they have time for a relationship? My kids are my life and are everything to me (where does dating fit in?) Selfie pictures only All pictures with face obscured or wearing a baseball cap. Obese, but lists himself as average Any pictures with any woman that is not his grandma or child Obese, but wants a slender woman Over the age of 50, but still wants to have kids...that means the woman probably has to be under the age of 36 ish. Incomplete profile
SYLLPalmer Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Dudes hugging old ladies and kids and pets.... these shots look contrived and they tell me nothing unique about you. Oh my god this guy loves his mother...plllllllllllllllllllll. Unless your mother is super adorable and the shot is both dynamic and compelling save it. As for the kids I get it that I am gonna be second fiddle but the burden is on you not to let me feel that. I take these daddy shots as lazy disclaimers and 9 times of ten it is a rule out. People in front of their cars.... If someone snaps you under a Lotus and you are all cute and sexy covered in grease I wont hold it against you if I can ID the make of the vehicle. If you post yourself standing in front of any vehicle with the intent of selling yourself it is going to set off my cheese meter. I don't care who manufactures it. Photos without dates. Chronology tells me nothing especially living in southern California where 26 can look 38 and so on. I hate when there is like 5 shots and in 4 of them he is somewhat hot and the last one he seems to have hit the wall. No dates. Ok so the first four were you twenty years ago and the last one.... is.. you ... now. Thanks for late wake up call and wast of time. It behooves you to keep your face strictly recent. We can walk down memory lane to a time when you were hot as **** after I fall for you. Otherwise I am hearing Cher's horrible voice singing "if I could turn back time" Ubiquitous use of the drinks socially descriptor. If you drink every day but never alone that doesn't make you a social drinker. If it is a deal breaker that I don't drink you are not a social drinker. Get familiar with the USPSTF levels of alcohol misuse and properly describe yourself. Screening and Behavioral Counseling Interventions in Primary Care to Reduce Alcohol Misuse For men, risky or hazardous drinking is often considered as having more than 4 drinks in one day or more than 14 drinks a week. For women, risky or hazardous drinking is often considered as having more than 3 drinks in one day or more than 7 drinks a week. Kill the opener "looking for my best friend" and insert "looking for that special drinking buddy" if the venue doesn't allow you to slate yourself as an "often" or "desperate" drinker. 2
Eternal Sunshine Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Lame, generic profiles. "I am an easy going guy that enjoys hanging out with friends." Men having pics with women that are visibly cut out or even worse, still in the picture. Men pictured with big fish (wtf) Men without a shirt on or semi-naked. Too sleazy.
Eternal Sunshine Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Oh and men that have 69 in their username. C'mon you are not 15 anymore. 2
Author Keenly Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 Lame, generic profiles. "I am an easy going guy that enjoys hanging out with friends." Men having pics with women that are visibly cut out or even worse, still in the picture. Men pictured with big fish (wtf) Men without a shirt on or semi-naked. Too sleazy. I think I have this problem, because I am AWFUL at talking about myself to a blank slate. Just terrible.
MixedUpChick Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 One of my favorite's in a man's profile, was "I'm looking for my sole mate" :laugh: Sorry dude, I'm not your other shoe... 10
MixedUpChick Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Oh yeah, here are a few other favorite things I see in men's profiles (these men are usually in about the 43-59 yr age range: 1) Listing all your interests & then mentioning how great it would be to find a woman with the same interests (apparently looking for a clone of himself) 2) Listing in your profile that your kids are grown, but at least one of your pictures is you with little kids, no caption on the picture... is it a 10+ year old picture & you look a lot older now, too? 3) Pictures in profile all have datestamps on them that are a few years old. What the heck do you look like now?? 4) Pictures from really far away so you can't really see what the guy's face looks like. 5) Pictures that make Nick Nolte's mug shot look like a Glamour Shots photo (guys with crazy hair, crazy eyes, grumpy expression, etc). I always think "wow, if I rolled over in bed & saw THAT face in the night, I'd probably have a heart attack!" 6) Listing almost no interests or information, & just saying "if there's anything you want to know, just ask" 7) Men trying to find a creative way to say they don't want to date a heavier girl, but trying to be polite about it. I've seen something along the lines of "must be height/weight proportionate", and just yesterday I saw a guy's profile where he specified "your waist size can't be larger than mine"
happykat Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 I think it's lame when they write things that are so cliche, like- I love my kids more then anything (what parent doesn't) I love to laugh and have fun (duhhh, really?) I live every day to the fullest (no you don't) .. lol also, speaking of kids - I don't know if it's just me but I think it's kind of weird to even mention your kids on OLD sites (I never have - other than to state yes I have children), let alone post pics of them with you.. yah, and like stated above- automatic rejects are shirtless guys, guys with 69 in their user name, guys standing in front of an expensive car 1
Lady2163 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Never mind 69 in the title...I just came across a user name of: Blowmeright Yeah, I'll be sure to message you... 2
Author Keenly Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 Never mind 69 in the title...I just came across a user name of: Blowmeright Yeah, I'll be sure to message you... Now that is pretty funny. 1
antonio1149 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Over the age of 50, but still wants to have kids...that means the woman probably has to be under the age of 36 ish. If he still wants to have kids, what age range would you suggest?
antonio1149 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 7) Men trying to find a creative way to say they don't want to date a heavier girl, but trying to be polite about it. I've seen something along the lines of "must be height/weight proportionate", and just yesterday I saw a guy's profile where he specified "your waist size can't be larger than mine" If he doesn't want to date a heavier girl, and wants to discourage them from contacting him so he doesn't have to face a constant stream of inappropriate, discouraging and time-wasting responses (which WILL happen), how do you suggest he get this point across?
Lady2163 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 If he still wants to have kids, what age range would you suggest? Well, my dad was 38 when I was born and he was too old to play catch with me or shoot baskets, yet he did it with my older siblings... I would say men should not be retirement age 62 and older before the child graduates high school. While in theory, women can still have babies until menopause, don't health risks increase for them after age 35? I haven't checked the literature lately. I can honestly say, I had my tubes tied at 43, because even if I met the man of my dreams the very next day, it would still have been a year before marriage and nine months after that before I would have given birth. 45 is too old to have a first baby.
antonio1149 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Well, my dad was 38 when I was born and he was too old to play catch with me or shoot baskets, yet he did it with my older siblings... I would say men should not be retirement age 62 and older before the child graduates high school. While in theory, women can still have babies until menopause, don't health risks increase for them after age 35? I haven't checked the literature lately. I can honestly say, I had my tubes tied at 43, because even if I met the man of my dreams the very next day, it would still have been a year before marriage and nine months after that before I would have given birth. 45 is too old to have a first baby. I understand your opinion about guys not having kids at an older age--many share your views. But that wasn't your original objection. You didn't say "Over the age of 50, but still wants to have kids...that means he'll be too old to do sports when they're teenagers." You said "Over the age of 50, but still wants to have kids...that means the woman probably has to be under the age of 36 ish." So it seems your objection was more about him desiring a younger woman (driven by the need to have a fertile mate) than other potential issues. Yes? Wouldn't you agree that *if* a 50+ man makes the decision to have children (whether anyone thinks it's wise or not), finding a 36ish or under partner is not unreasonable ... ?
PegNosePete Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 "Ask me anything I don't bite" and that's all they write. OK... do you believe that free choice is simply an illusion created by the many-worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics? Can you explain why the Nash equilibrium of prisoners dilemma is a pareto-suboptimal equilibrium? I mean WTF do you expect me to ask you about when you have told me NOTHING about you?! 5
BikerAccnt Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 When women list salary requirements that are stratospheric when it appears they live in a shack from the pictures. Women (and I am sure men do this to) have no idea how much they really weigh any more! People list themselves as avg. when they are clearly carrying extra weight - though, I suppose that is average these days - Fit, when they aren't heavy but don't look as if they've lifted anything heavier than a grocery bag in years, and Curvy, when all the curves kind of mold into one another in one big blob. Please people ..look in the mirror!
isisisweeping Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Well, my dad was 38 when I was born and he was too old to play catch with me or shoot baskets, yet he did it with my older siblings... I would say men should not be retirement age 62 and older before the child graduates y. My dad was 40 when I was born and I'm not the youngest and he wasn't too old to do any of that for any of us, even my youngest brother. My mom was 24 when I was born and she didn't do any of that with us. And they were married 25 years until my mom died. My dad is still alive. People can have kids whenever they want .. Risks increase at women over 35 and men over 45 but that's just risks, not what kind of parent they will be. 1
isisisweeping Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 When women list salary requirements that are stratospheric when it appears they live in a shack from the pictures. Women (and I am sure men do this to) have no idea how much they really weigh any more! People list themselves as avg. when they are clearly carrying extra weight - though, I suppose that is average these days - Fit, when they aren't heavy but don't look as if they've lifted anything heavier than a grocery bag in years, and Curvy, when all the curves kind of mold into one another in one big blob. Please people ..look in the mirror! I listed myself as overweight with realistic pictures and got argued with about me being average not overweight! 1
PegNosePete Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Arguing with a potential date, now that is a strategy I probably wouldn't recommend... 3
Lady2163 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 I understand your opinion about guys not having kids at an older age--many share your views. But that wasn't your original objection. You didn't say "Over the age of 50, but still wants to have kids...that means he'll be too old to do sports when they're teenagers." You said "Over the age of 50, but still wants to have kids...that means the woman probably has to be under the age of 36 ish." So it seems your objection was more about him desiring a younger woman (driven by the need to have a fertile mate) than other potential issues. Yes? Wouldn't you agree that *if* a 50+ man makes the decision to have children (whether anyone thinks it's wise or not), finding a 36ish or under partner is not unreasonable ... ? I think a 14+ year age span is pretty unrealistic and selfish. Yes, yes, I know it can and does work. A 50 year old man in average health want to have children. Maybe he is a reformed smoker, minimal drinker and eats well. I still say the odds of him living to walk his daughter down the aisle are less than 50%. In my opinion and experience, in most cases, he will die and leave a widow who has to retool her life and a child who is without a parent too soon. I recently met a 21 year old, who had a much older father. His mother died in a car crash several years ago. He was trying to enjoy the college experience, but had to deal with placing his father in an assisted living facility. None of his peers could relate. He had some conflicting emotions. While he was glad to be born he felt his parents left him with a huge burden and no support system.
BlametheIrish Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 How about the people who say they want a drama free person. Those are usually the most dramatic people on OLD per my experience. 2
PegNosePete Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 How about the people who say they want a drama free person. Those are usually the most dramatic people on OLD per my experience. Yeah, but then it makes sense that they want a drama-free person, since they are bringing enough to the table for both of you! 2
Lady2163 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 How about the people who say they want a drama free person. Those are usually the most dramatic people on OLD per my experience. I lead the most drama free life possible. Yet, I removed a comment similar to that from my profile, because evidently any mention of that brings it into doubt. Seriously, no kids, no lunatic exes, low-maintenance friends, slightly higher maintemce aging parent, no money troubles, no addictions, love my job. It really is drama free!
Author Keenly Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 " I just got out of a long/bad/horrible/abusive relationship. " Aka I'm rebounding.
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