hudsonjessicat Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 I am a lesbian and 5 months ago I was dumped by my soon to be ex wife. I never thought anything was wrong with our relationship in fact we tried getting pregnant for over a year and the day after mothers day we found out we were expecting. I found out I was having twins and on her birthday we found out we were having a boy and a girl. Everything was great, yes we got into arguments and things like that but who doesn't. I lost the babies in August and 4 days after the loss of the babies she told me she didn't want to be tied down anymore and that she didn't know if I was the one she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. But she kept playing games with me saying she didn't want a divorce and then she did and she didn't want to be with me at that time but who knew if we would get back together. Then she turned really cold and heartless, got into a new relationship, I found out that's why I was dumped, she told me she wants to forget about the 2 years we spent with each other and the babies. And her mom and her came to my house harassing me yelling that's why my babies died and I killed them and I had to get restraining orders on them. Strangely though I still love her and I still feel very connected to her. but I don't want this feeling anymore. we are getting divorced and I want to stop caring so much, I have dreams about her, my heart hurts without her at times. I have not tried to ruin things with her and her new girlfriend I have not tried to get back at her. I left her alone when she said she was seeing someone new. but 5 months has passed and I still miss her. Whats wrong with me? I feel like I did wrong, like I messed up everything, and I want to apologize for how sorry I am!
Itspointless Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 You did nothing wrong as far as I can see from this story. I do see multiple lines of grief though, both leaving you with lots of emotions and hormones in your body to deal with on your own. In such a period care and understanding would be the preferred thing, instead you got a beating. I guess she has her own grief, but her way of dealing is uncalled for, also shame unto her mom. Give yourself time, 5 months is nothing. It takes time to replace the dreams you had for better ones.
iouaname Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Wow. First of all, I'm sorry for the loss of your babies. That must have been very hard I don't think she sounds very nice. To leave you just DAYS after you had lost those babies and then tell you she wants to forget about you... ew. Gross. I don't even care what she might have been going through at the time, that's just plain crappy. Her mom was also way out of line. You didn't do anything wrong, from what I can tell. You didn't lose the babies through any fault of your own and the behavior of your ex/her mother was atrocious. 1
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