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First date kisses, meaningless??


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Posted

So I went on a date today with a guy I met online. It was a lunch date which was lovely as it just seemed so casual and I was more relaxed. Anyway we had a meal and chatted and we had a lot and common and got on well. He even suggested a drink after the meal which I accepted. He then walked me to my car and gave me a lovely kiss. It really was lovely. Which made me think that the date must have gone well, else he wouldn't have kissed me. Anyway 48hours since and no call. Was it meaningless or should I still expect a call??

Posted

When you are waiting for the call 2 days seems like a long time but it's not. Yes we all have the ability for instant communications but that doesn't mean all people use it or that they have to.

 

 

I wouldn't invest emotionally in this guy just yet. I'd assume he's not going to call but if he gets in touch within the week, I wouldn't sweat it.

Posted

or you could contact him? :) you never know

  • Like 2
Posted

I kiss a girl at the end of the date even if I'm only mildly interested. Its another part of the person I want to know about. Its also a privilege of being single, why not if you can? In general kissing is pretty hot with anyone your attracted to.

But yeah, you should just send him a text if youre interested and then wait for his response.

  • Author
Posted

Ok so I've just sent him a message thanking him for my meal and drinks and said that I had fun. He replied with 'no worries, it was good, I'm off to sleep now, have a good night x'

 

I'm not holding out much hope to be honest, I think he just kissed me to be polite.

  • Like 2
Posted
Ok so I've just sent him a message thanking him for my meal and drinks and said that I had fun. He replied with 'no worries, it was good, I'm off to sleep now, have a good night x'

 

I'm not holding out much hope to be honest, I think he just kissed me to be polite.

 

 

 

He just wanted to get a kiss. This text response and the lack of communication prior to you texting him just shows he is not that interested. If a guy wants to see a lady again, he will definitely let her know.

  • Like 1
Posted
So I went on a date today with a guy I met online. It was a lunch date which was lovely as it just seemed so casual and I was more relaxed. Anyway we had a meal and chatted and we had a lot and common and got on well. He even suggested a drink after the meal which I accepted. He then walked me to my car and gave me a lovely kiss. It really was lovely. Which made me think that the date must have gone well, else he wouldn't have kissed me. Anyway 48hours since and no call. Was it meaningless or should I still expect a call??

 

A kiss is usually a good sign, but it's also possible that even after a kiss it doesn't proceed further for any number of reasons that have nothing to do with you.

 

Did you guys discuss going out again while on the date? T

 

You could call him just to ease your mind, but admittedly I am old school and usually expect him to either plan for a future date during the current one or to call/message me shortly after to do so.

Posted
Ok so I've just sent him a message thanking him for my meal and drinks and said that I had fun. He replied with 'no worries, it was good, I'm off to sleep now, have a good night x'

 

I'm not holding out much hope to be honest, I think he just kissed me to be polite.

 

Saw this after my post.

 

Yea he doesn't sound interested. I also meant to add that some people seem to kiss as something to do and not always out of genuine interest, which is incredibly dumb IMO. If you're not interested why do things to make the person believe you are. If I am uninterested, I am not rude but certainly won't be touchy feely or kiss him either.

 

If he was interested he'd probably have made plans while you were saying your goodbyes or he would have gotten in touch and when you got in touch he wouldn't have been so quick to get off the phone. He is clearly being polite but making it clear there is no future. On to the next!

  • Author
Posted

I agree, I get he's not interested just wish he'd have said goodbye without the kiss.

 

This keeps happening to me, it doesn't half lower my already low self-esteem. I'm convinced it must be me, the way I look or something I did wrong :(

Posted

This is why i never kiss guys in a 1st date

  • Like 2
Posted

Kiss on 1st date always implies interest. Yes he was interested in you at that moment. But that doesn't mean he is interested in ONLY you.

 

This is what happened to me last year. One Wednesday night I had a 1st date with a lovely lady. We had a great dinner and kissed in my car. We were very attracted to each other, and wanted to have sex. But I don't push for sex on the 1st date, so we ended up just making out for an hour in my car.

 

I had lined up another 1st date with another lovely woman 2 evenings later. It was love at first sight. The kissing was a lot more intense. Again, we wanted to have sex, but I did not push for it.

 

I went home and texted the 1st lady that I think she is wonderful, but I am not interested at this time. I have been dating the 2nd woman ever since. We are going to get married this year.

  • Like 1
Posted

I rarely kiss on a first date. They're for figuring people out and whether you want to see them again. If there's a date two you both know that you like each other at least a little and that you're both comfortable going for it.

Posted

He may be playing the same game girls play, the ultimate passive aggressive obstacle course..if it's normal for girls to play with guys' emotions, so be it the other way around..but logically speaking, why would he go for the kiss if he weren't interested? And his "i could care less" attitude afterwards sounds like the first step out of a player's manual he read somewhere online..so the chances weigh towards him being interested, but he made it perfectly clear that if he is interested, he will playing this game, hard.

Posted
Ok so I've just sent him a message thanking him for my meal and drinks and said that I had fun. He replied with 'no worries, it was good, I'm off to sleep now, have a good night x'

 

I'm not holding out much hope to be honest, I think he just kissed me to be polite.

And this is why I never kiss on the first date.

 

I only kiss girls I really like, and odds are I will not really like somebody if we've only been on one date.

Posted (edited)

Kisses from strangers don't mean anything to me... It has nothing to do with you.

 

 

If a guy tries to kiss me that early, I have to assume he's kissing/making out with every woman they meet or are attracted to. Take a look around LS... that's pretty much the case. They are all 'going for the kiss' regardless of how they feel. It's not about how much they like YOU... it's about finding out if you like them... rather than going to the effort of getting to know you first.

 

 

These days, if a guy tried to kiss me that soon, I'd lose interest. For the reasons posted earlier. I think it is kind of gross to be kissing on someone who is probably going to have his hands down some other woman's pants the next day (or be trying to). I'm also not interested in guys who 'fall' that fast.

 

 

Easy in, easy out is my observation.

 

 

My advice? cut this guy loose... and stop getting emotionally invested in and reading or worrying about behavior from total strangers.

Edited by RedRobin
Posted

He is seeing someone else. Nothing to do with the kiss on the first date. Sorry OP.

  • Author
Posted

I just assumed that most men wouldn't kiss a girl they weren't interested in. The kiss made me expect another date or a call. I just don't get why a man would kiss me if he had no intention of seeing me again.

Posted
I just assumed that most men wouldn't kiss a girl they weren't interested in. The kiss made me expect another date or a call. I just don't get why a man would kiss me if he had no intention of seeing me again.

 

 

same reason alot of men sleep with women they have no intention of seeing again. Don't read anything into behavior of total strangers.

 

 

Why would you want another date or call from a guy who tries to kiss total strangers and doesn't set up another date?

 

 

Also, if he were that interested, he'd be trying to set up another date on the spot... not waiting however many days afterwards...

  • Like 2
Posted

I kiss when I feel like it. And not when I am supposed to based on some ritual. This has happened as early as the first meeting to as late as the 6th time we've spent time together. I only recall doing the ritual goodnight/goodbye kiss as a first kiss three times in my life- I'm in my 40s. When you kiss someone during the date you communicate your interest unequivocally. It can't be mistaken for going through the motions. It tells her you like her and you're willing to defy custom to express it. Obviously you don't kiss her if she isn't receptive. Body language is key.

 

I don't ever set up the next date on the previous date but I always tell someone if I am interested in seeing her again. If I can tell she's interested I tell her right away- I had fun and I'd like to get together again sometime. If I can't tell, I will send a text afterwards saying the same. This gives her a safe way to say no. If she's receptive I say ok, great- I will call you on such and such a day. There's none of this wondering whether I will call. If she contacts me before then I know she is very interested.

Posted
Anyway 48hours since and no call. Was it meaningless or should I still expect a call??

 

He could be one of those guys that religiously reads AskMen articles, or similar, following the advice that men should wait 3 - 60 days before contacting the woman for dates and sex.

Posted

I wouldn't do anything at all anymore and move on to other guys.

His text seemed pretty uninterested kind.

 

Guys can do whole lot of stuff which show they are interested, and then just disappear!

 

So don't think much about all that...

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