datingnoob93 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 I'm wondering how to handle a girl who seems like a serial dater and has a lot more experience than me. I went out with her once a couple of months ago. It was my first date ever since I graduated HS, and had no clue what I was doing and completely scewed up. I tried to get a second date but she flaked and did not respond, so I let her go. Meanwhile I dated a couple of other girls, but I've gotten nowhere, so yesterday I decided to text this girl out of the blue to say hi. She actually agreed to go out with me again. Now even though I messed up on our date months before I am really happy to get another shot. She is smoking hot (a legit 10/10) and has a great sense of humor. But I'm kind of worried about her history. On our date she mentioned repeatedly other guys she's dated recently and how much money they were spending. She was like, this guy took me to super expensive restaurant X, this other guy wanted to take me to a cruise, etc. She's a couple of years older than me (mid late twenties) and has way, way more experience. Meanwhile I'm 20, I don't have a lot of money, I'm still in school, and I live with my parents. What's the best way for me to handle her and make myself different from the other guys she dates ? I've been fantasizing about her for months now (I can't believe I even dated her, let alone get another chance) and I want to make this count. I don't want her to use me for free food and company for an evening when she has nothing else going on, like the last girl that I dated. Is it even possible for me given her history and our experience difference ? Thanks!
Phantom888 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 You shouldnt be dating someone so different from you. How are you gonna compete with all this cool older guys who would be hitting on her left and right? Do you have a lot to offer at this point? You are just setting yourself up for having to worry all the time.
d0nnivain Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Why do you want to date this woman? It sounds to me with all her name dropping she's a bit of gold digger only dating guys for what they can give her: status, meals in nice restaurants, etc 1
Author datingnoob93 Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 I don't have anything to offer in terms of money obviously. But somehow she agreed to date me twice so she must see something. I'm not experienced with dating and women so my confidence is not high. Maybe she likes my appearance ? Or more likely she just likes the attention. Why I want to date her ? Because I now have more dating experience than before. When I dated her that was my first date, ever. I had no clue what I was doing. I was missing signals, acting weak, clingly, and insecure, and letting her walk over me. It would have been bad enough to date someone of my age without experience, but this is a woman who's dated heck knows how many guys. So it was boy vs. woman. But the last few weeks I've been dating, posting, reading forums, reading books, etc and I have a bit more experience now. So I feel that its time to try again with her.
MrMeh Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 I honestly don't see what you have to lose. Do you know anything she might like in particular?
Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Obviously these guys dropped a lot of cash on her, but where are they now?? The date should not be about how much money you spend, but how much fun the two of you can have together. Try to come up with some ideas of fun things you can do that would not be expensive. I don't know this girl, but when I was dating, I grew to hate the whole dinner and drinks scene. The idea is to open her up to your personality and good qualities, NOT your wallet. The guy I'm with now took me to the city park at night. We got coffee and walked around chatting. It was the best date I'd been on. Total cost was $6 and we are still together and very happy. If this is the kind of girl that values her relationships by how much money they spend, then you are better off moving on. It takes more than looks to qualify as a 10/10.
Guitarisgood Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Honestly, who cares what every or anyone is saying about you here. You scored a date so there is a reason she feels something about you. Now is time to up your game. What it boils down to is if you give her the funnest time she will ever have on a date. Flirt, tease, the odd compliment and let her do all the talking i.e. just carry the conversation. Find something fun to do that will let you tease her or up a little competitive juices. What you have to do is show how or why you are any different to all the other guys. Don't be boring. Be bold - if the situation presents don't be afraid to grab her hand or go for a light touch. If you can feel the time is right for a kiss, go for it.
Author datingnoob93 Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 Looks like we'll be going to a restaurant. I was hoping to avoid this whole dinner / movie theme by suggesting some wintery activity but she texted me and asked if we can go to a specific restaurant. She did the exact same thing last time BTW...... makes me a little suspicious she's using me for fancy free food. Oh well at least we'll have lots of time to talk.
MrMeh Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Looks like we'll be going to a restaurant. I was hoping to avoid this whole dinner / movie theme by suggesting some wintery activity but she texted me and asked if we can go to a specific restaurant. She did the exact same thing last time BTW...... makes me a little suspicious she's using me for fancy free food. Oh well at least we'll have lots of time to talk. Tell her she can only order appetizers.. 1
BeholdtheMan Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Why do you want to date this woman? She's a 10/10 bro
d0nnivain Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 datingnoob93 I'm happy for you that you got a date. However, the fact that you wanted to do a winter activity but she said she wants to be taken to a particular restaurant is more proof that your theory is correct: she's using you for a free meal, dude. Yes, you will have lovely 10/10 eye candy sitting across the table from you but understand how much you are paying for the external view The inside isn't so lovely. This girl is a USER.
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