nicole9758 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Hey everyone! Please help me. My mind is so screwed up. I literally feel like taking my brain out and replacing it with a new one without my ex being included in it. The breakup has affected me badly. Probably because I'm the type that loves deeply. I broke up with my first love because of many different reasons. >>If you guys are interested in knowing why, I posted a thread about it: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/coping/455126-how-cope I hope you guys can read it, I don't wanna post the same thing a billion times Anyway, funny thing is, he seems like he isn't affected at all by the breakup, and I'm the one here being miserable a year after the breakup. He's out there talking to different girls and just moving on and I'm all here asking for advice about this. It kills me that he moved on so fast after the 2 whole years we were together. I mean did that not mean anything to him? I personally am not ready to go out there and start meeting other guys because I want to be fully healed when I do so. How could he forget me so fast? Are guys just always like this or what? How do I move on completely? Even until now I still stalk him online which seems so impossible to stop. Why do I have so much feelings for him UGH. I'm going through major self esteem issues because of this. I don't even know if I'm making sense I'm just so upset at the moment. Please help I really want to forget all the pain. It's been a year and I think I'm gonna go crazy.
d0nnivain Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 A year is kind of a long time to be still feeling these acute pain. People do grieve & heal at different speeds but perhaps consider professional help. He did not forget you. He's jut put you in a compartment called "memory" & moved forward with the rest of his life. He may seem to be "over it" because he was emotionally done with the relationship before the official break up. What have you done to help yourself heal? Have you taken all the mementos from the relationship & put them away or thrown them out? Have you deleted all social media ties from him & taken his contact info out of your phone? If not, you need to do those things. Also try adding new things into your life. Redecorate your living space. Change your hairstyle. Make yourself into a better you . . . somebody that you weren't when you were together with him.
Author nicole9758 Posted January 23, 2014 Author Posted January 23, 2014 A year is kind of a long time to be still feeling these acute pain. People do grieve & heal at different speeds but perhaps consider professional help. He did not forget you. He's jut put you in a compartment called "memory" & moved forward with the rest of his life. He may seem to be "over it" because he was emotionally done with the relationship before the official break up. What have you done to help yourself heal? Have you taken all the mementos from the relationship & put them away or thrown them out? Have you deleted all social media ties from him & taken his contact info out of your phone? If not, you need to do those things. Also try adding new things into your life. Redecorate your living space. Change your hairstyle. Make yourself into a better you . . . somebody that you weren't when you were together with him. Well tbh, I was seriously over him after I broke up with him. Then 7 months later, I got a message from him on fb saying that he was sorry and misses me etc. Which made all my feelings come back :/ I wish he hadn't talked to me. So it's not like I was miserable for the whole year, only for the last 5 months. But I stopped all contact with him after that because I didn't wanna get hurt anymore. I didn't wanna be a 'safety net' if you know what I mean. I never broke NC ever and I have done all the things the you suggested. How do I get my head together like I did at the start of the breakup?
TXGuy Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Stop internet stalking him. That is only making things worse for you.
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