saltyfishhead666 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Random question but would love to hear opinions. I am on an online dating site, usually this progresses to texting prior to arranging a date. I talk with 2-3 guys at the same time some lead to dates others don't. My question is if you've been talking with a guy, and he just stops replying (having not been on a date yet) when is appropriate to delete their number? I have been asking myself this for a good while now and I'm not sure actually! I don't fancy them texting out of the blue saying hey and I'm like hey who the heck are ya lol.
WP4046 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Random question but would love to hear opinions. I am on an online dating site, usually this progresses to texting prior to arranging a date. I talk with 2-3 guys at the same time some lead to dates others don't. My question is if you've been talking with a guy, and he just stops replying (having not been on a date yet) when is appropriate to delete their number? I have been asking myself this for a good while now and I'm not sure actually! I don't fancy them texting out of the blue saying hey and I'm like hey who the heck are ya lol. There is no set rule when to delete someone's number, if you are not feeling it then move on. I just deleted a woman's number last night
radiodarcy Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 I've experienced this as well. I usually assume they met someone else who was a better fit for them. The way I see it, if they couldn't be bothered to keep in touch and then send me a text weeks or months down the road because they bored or whatnot; then they've confirmed my decision to delete their number. And a response is not warranted
mammasita Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 I say a couple weeks and be done. Thats more than enough time. 2
Author saltyfishhead666 Posted January 22, 2014 Author Posted January 22, 2014 That's what I'm thinking. I mean sure you text someone and sometimes they are busy... If they don't respond in like 5 days you think hmmm... I think a few weeks is a good idea! Although I recall changing my number in November and not giving some people my new number mainly because they hadn't bothered replying. One messaged me on said dating site the other week saying hey why aren't you replying to my texts. Yeah dude, now you wanna talk 2 months later lol:lmao:
SYLLPalmer Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 That's what I'm thinking. I mean sure you text someone and sometimes they are busy... If they don't respond in like 5 days you think hmmm... I think a few weeks is a good idea! Although I recall changing my number in November and not giving some people my new number mainly because they hadn't bothered replying. One messaged me on said dating site the other week saying hey why aren't you replying to my texts. Yeah dude, now you wanna talk 2 months later lol:lmao: I keep contacts to make educated decisions only. I change the name to suit my consensus. If I am feeling playful it is a nice reminder to proceed with caution. A jackass could get me at the wrong time and either I forget he's a jackass or someone else is a more prominent jackass then I am at risk for upping my jackass load. Men who do recirculate seem to do so every six weeks if I allow it. If there was "hurt" involved and I am past it I take great pleasure in toying with their manlihood initially. Once the names elicits a feeling of boredom they get deleted cuz I don't care one way or another how they perceive my receiving of them. I happen to have alot of Ted's right now and they are all duds/tools. Don't want to get sucked into that. 1
Author saltyfishhead666 Posted January 22, 2014 Author Posted January 22, 2014 I keep contacts to make educated decisions only. I change the name to suit my consensus. If I am feeling playful it is a nice reminder to proceed with caution. A jackass could get me at the wrong time and either I forget he's a jackass or someone else is a more prominent jackass then I am at risk for upping my jackass load. Men who do recirculate seem to do so every six weeks if I allow it. If there was "hurt" involved and I am past it I take great pleasure in toying with their manlihood initially. Once the names elicits a feeling of boredom they get deleted cuz I don't care one way or another how they perceive my receiving of them. I happen to have alot of Ted's right now and they are all duds/tools. Don't want to get sucked into that. LMFAO!!!! Now this made me chuckle! Luckily none of mine are teds... Maybe they will become bobs though ;-)
curlygirl40 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 This might seem really silly but this is what I do. Typically if I haven't met the guy I will just erase him as a contact unless I have a hunch he'll be back. With guys I've met who then fade away, I keep a list on my phone. Like in a notepad ap I put their name and the last 4 digits of their phone number. This way if I get a random text (which happens often!) I can look at that list to see who it is to know if I should even bother replying. Yet they aren't in as a contact. And this is why I know I've been on over 50 first dates, lol, because I've done this from the beginning 2
newmoon Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 wow, you guys are all pretty generous. if I met the guy i will go maximum 7 days before I delete the number. if we haven't met and we're just talking/texting, then 4 days of no contact = delete. I don't have time for time-wasters and I won't even remember someone weeks down the line. 1
MixedUpChick Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 I say a couple weeks and be done. That's more than enough time. I don't keep numbers around for more than a couple weeks if there's been no contact - except there was one weird guy I dated a while back, I kept him in my phone for a couple months just so I could block him easily... otherwise I don't see any reason to keep their number. If they happen to text me after I've deleted them, I always ask who it is, so they know they weren't important enough for me to keep their number after all that time. Can't have some random guy who dropped off the face of the earth thinking he was special enough for me to hold onto his number just "in case" he decided to grace me with a text after a long time.
salparadise Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 And this is why I know I've been on over 50 first dates, lol, because I've done this from the beginning I do the almost the same thing except I move the contact to a group rather than keeping a list. There is a nice little app called Groups that creates and manages groups. Active women are in Friends, and when I deactivate one she moves to Black Book which I keep switched off so they're not visible. I have 96 in the Black Book at the moment. I've thought about just running through the whole list sometime and seeing how many would be open to meeting again. Most of them I faded on after the initial coffee date. Many of them I can't even recall.
PegNosePete Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Why do you need to delete them, does your phone have limited memory or something? I doubt it, these days... unlike the old days where the SIM can only store 100 contacts, most phones have multiple GB's of storage space. If you hear nothing for a week just rename the contact "OLD Dave" (see what I did there..? ).
Frank2thepoint Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 When you receive that nascent idea about deleting someone's phone, and mulling over how long you should wait before deleting it, you shouldn't even wait or hesitate. Just delete it in that moment. You'll feel a rush, a guilty pleasure, maybe some doubt, but a few moments later, calm and relief.
Phantom888 Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Isnt it okay to just keep the number so when the name pops up, you know to just ignore? I mean with the phones these days you can input unlimited contacts, and it's always good to know who is texting you. You can respond at your own discretion. My GF was getting texts from people she dated last year. These men didn't know she is in a committed relationship now, so they text her hello every 6-8 weeks to see if she's available. She just ignores them because she knows who they are.
Arieswoman Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 When I was single and dating and I didn't hear anything from a guy after a week then his number would be gone. If I was so forgettable, why should I keep his number? Occasionally, I had a call from a guy after 2/3/4 weeks after a date who said he was sorry he hadn't 'phoned me but he had been "busy". My response was always the same - " if you are 'too busy' to 'phone me then I am 'too busy' to see you, byeeee" If guys are bothered they will call smartish and fix another date. If they don't, why clog up your phone/ life with their numbers? 2
SoonMyFriend Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 I keep them in my phone only so I can remember who it is when they inevitably pull the line mentioned above "ohhh sorry I've been SOOO busy" I just deleted numbers from a year ago that I figured were safe to get rid of. Honestly, just delete them when you feel like it. I'm just a bit OCD about keeping things organized otherwise I'd just delete them.
Frank2thepoint Posted January 23, 2014 Posted January 23, 2014 Isnt it okay to just keep the number so when the name pops up, you know to just ignore? I mean with the phones these days you can input unlimited contacts, and it's always good to know who is texting you. You can respond at your own discretion. My mentality is the opposite. If it's an unknown number, I ignore it. Now if I receive a text or a voicemail and the person identify themselves, and I had bad history with the person, I still ignore it. The other day I received a text from an unknown number. The person just said "Hi", no identification. I never responded and deleted the text. Life is simpler this way for me.
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