Mondmellonw Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 ..But I'll keep going. Today I've been feeling a little low. Tomorrow I will be finally back to college... I met my ex there, and his another ex also got graduated from this same school. Once you get graduated you still have to do some business in there to get your title. Chances are I'll see them there. Maybe together, maybe not. I hope, I really hope I don't see them never again. It's making me a little nervous to think about it. The background the my story is: Well, she cheated on him , he left her, he try to convinced me he was over her, that wasn't true at all, he still stalked her during our relationship, I broke up with him, he got drunk and slept with her, and now he is dating a "girl friend" of mine who supported me during the BU, and is friends with his other ex... Oh, and he hates me... I don't know why but I don't hate him. I feel a lot of anger for everything he did, specially during and after the break up, but I don't feel hate. It's almost like I try very hard to feel it but then I discover that I can't, and start feeling sad. Like I said... Yes, I feel very, very angry. I curse him a lot, so to speak.. But at the time, I feel sad. Maybe, the only hate I have now is towards me. I always blame myself for have being insecure during our relationship, being demanding. I also feel my worst mistake was to be naive and rush onto having a serious relationship with him. He also went very serious about it. I tought he was over her, because he never talked with hatred of love, he only told me the "truth" about their relationship. It seems it wasn't the truth. Or, it seems I am just trying to find answers and I'm making theories about this whole mess... I'm very busy with my music lessons, and I keep myself healthy, try to look nice, etc. But I am still a little confused on my mind. I need to have the courage to be on that school, were everybody knows him, his other ex, and well, me... Idk, just needed to vent, to let this feelings go. Thanks for everything!
fixing Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Your doing excellent so far! Yeah, sounds like your trying to reason with what happened. He's a liar, and a cheater. He's worthless. If and when you see him and her, dont hide or walk away but put on a front and give an indifferent smile if you make eye contact. Act like you do not give two ****s about them, that will hurt him a little lol. Good luck 1
JDPT Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Be strong, hand in there think about your future, the endless possibilities and opportunities. Take advantage of every single one and expand your horizons. 1
Author Mondmellonw Posted January 22, 2014 Author Posted January 22, 2014 Thank you both, fixing and JDPT. fixing: I am a little afraid they may want to approach me. If I see them and they don't try to have a conversation with me, it's gonna be easier to ignore them (hope so...). But I have this feeling, I hope I'm wrong. JDPT: Thank you I will. My career and learning music are passions now. I just gotta get completely rid of this passion I had for him, or for I thought he was, and everything is gonna fall into place. 2
fixing Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Hey, whatever happens happens. Your getting worked up over this and that will be evident to them if you cross paths. Do not give them the satisfaction of seeing you uncomfortable. Put it out of your mind. You know what to do. Your just gonna reciprocate a nod, a smile, a wave and be on your way. Your not going to initiate it. If they want to speak to you, you say, 'sorry i have a meeting with a tutor, GOODBYE MADAFAKAS!' Then be on your way 1
Author Mondmellonw Posted January 22, 2014 Author Posted January 22, 2014 Hey, whatever happens happens. Your getting worked up over this and that will be evident to them if you cross paths. Do not give them the satisfaction of seeing you uncomfortable. Put it out of your mind. You know what to do. Your just gonna reciprocate a nod, a smile, a wave and be on your way. Your not going to initiate it. If they want to speak to you, you say, 'sorry i have a meeting with a tutor, GOODBYE MADAFAKAS!' Then be on your way Thanks again. Actually everything went normal, (better than expected) on this first day. The only thing was that his brother (who is also at this school) insistently looked at me.
Recommended Posts