confused83 Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 This is really confusing but i'll try to keep it short and thanks for any SERIOUS advice. Basically whenever my GF wants to do anything because we are in the early stages of the relationship she always says things like 'I dont want to go tbh i just want to see you' which is really nice and i feel the same way, then the other day we had an argument when we was apart and she started saying things like 'i am scared to be apart because i think youll overthink things and leave me' and 'i need time to do my own things and you need time to' like shes trying to convince me to have time apart when i dont really want to. We dont live in each others pockets and she does have a kid which i great with, we spend id say around 4 days together a week and have been going out properly now for near on 3 months. We both say we're soul mates and cannot believe how lucky we are yet when she says things like the above i cant help thinking she wants more time apart but for some reason daren't ask for it. Her ex did keep leaving her for no reason and not come back for months sometimes so guess i no why she worries but i now am just confused as to whether she actually wants to see me or not?? I tested her earlier (which i no is immature and stupid but needed to try it) by saying 'lets just meet tomorrow instead as could do with looking for a new car' sort of hoping she would say she really wanted to see me today and she just said 'yh ok ill go shopping then cya tomorrow' we now havent text for 2 hours and i just dont know where i stand with her, when i ask out right she says it was heat of the moment stuff and that she loves seeing me yet i feel now if i dont text her she doesnt text me. I feel shes growing bored of me already and as much as i know me concentrating on other things will probably save us i cant help but feel i love talking to her and miss it. I know people will say just do your own thing but sometimes thats easier said than done when you love someone a lot
WrinkledForehead Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 "I think you'll overthink things and leave me" is a sign of insecurity on her part. Her stating she wants time apart is healthy and normal. You see each other four days a week after dating for three months, which is also healthy and normal. I wouldn't be concerned unless her requests for time apart start detracting from the total sum of time already spent together. I think my concern lies with the fact that she's introduced you to her child so early on. You say you're soulmates; how old is the child and does s/he know you're mommy's boyfriend? That's a step that shouldn't be taken for several more months--most relationships end around 3-4 months and stability for children of any age is very important. I'd be concerned about mom's willingness to compromise her child's psyche by exposing the child to her intimate relationship while the R is still in the fledgling stages.
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