snooplama Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 I have a friend who I met through a job where I worked for her. Her company closed several years ago and we remained friends. She had a baby and a couple of months ago she asked me if I would watch the baby when she went to school or the gym. It's twice a week and she pays me for my time. While having extra money is nice, I don't really need to do this for the money and it's not a lot of money either. I guess I keep doing it for the heck of it. My problem is when she introduces me to people the last couple of times she called me her nanny. I have known her on a personal level for so long and she makes it sound like she found me from some agency. I don't know what to say when she does this. Any ideas?
CC12 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Hm. I think I see what you mean. She's probably just using the word "nanny" as shorthand - an easy way to introduce you instead of saying, "This is my friend snooplama, she babysits for us." I doubt she means any offense. I can understand why you're not fond of her calling you that, since it sort of implies that you're hired help, rather than a valued friend. She is paying you to look after her kid, though, so by definition, you kind of are the nanny. And there's nothing wrong with being a nanny. It's an important job. But if you'd prefer a different title, then tell your friend you'd rather go by that instead of "the nanny."
Confuddled1983 Posted January 22, 2014 Posted January 22, 2014 Is she trying to "brag"? As in "Hey look I can afford a nanny" type of thing? It seems odd that she would refer to you as the nanny! Personally I'd stop looking after her child and tell her to find a nanny - if she asks why I would just say you think it's coming between your friendship as she often refers to you as hired help rather than a friend. 1
MaryJiltz Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 I would feel insulted if it were me.. I might be a little upset because she would rather say I'm a Nanny than a friend..
GG3 Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 I would feel insulted if it were me.. I might be a little upset because she would rather say I'm a Nanny than a friend.. I agree. I would feel insulted as well.
Ronni_W Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 I don't know what to say when she does this. Any ideas? "We-ell...she's not really paying me enough to be called a nanny but I do babysit for her when she needs one because I consider her a friend." Of course be all smiles and sweetness when you say that
preraph Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 I think if that's all you are to her, I'd stop being the nanny. Then see if she still wants anything to do with her. If you think there aren't plenty of mothers out there who make friends with babysitters in mind, you'd be naive. As my friend with kids says, You're really my only friend -- oh, well, I mean, I have to be friends with lots of other mothers for the kids, but I wouldn't be friends with them I didn't sort of have to.
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