Eternal Sunshine Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 I agree completely:( I guess at this moment in time I just don't care. I'm tired of being responsible and always making the right choices. I've rarely been able to enjoy partners because I am constantly thinking of where it will lead and whether he will be "the one". I guess for once I just want to enjoy the ride and not make the responsible choice..I just want to be happy right now even if that means I feel pain later. I'm incredibly happy with him for now:) You will come to regret this unfortunately
soccerrprp Posted January 28, 2014 Posted January 28, 2014 I agree completely:( I guess at this moment in time I just don't care. I'm tired of being responsible and always making the right choices. I've rarely been able to enjoy partners because I am constantly thinking of where it will lead and whether he will be "the one". I guess for once I just want to enjoy the ride and not make the responsible choice..I just want to be happy right now even if that means I feel pain later. I'm incredibly happy with him for now:) Are you certain that you're incredibly happy? This is a defeatest attitude. You're already compromising who you are b/c of frustration, fatigue. Not a good sign at all. 1
Author chicaboom Posted January 30, 2014 Author Posted January 30, 2014 Are you certain that you're incredibly happy? This is a defeatest attitude. You're already compromising who you are b/c of frustration, fatigue. Not a good sign at all. I am very happy when I am with him. I figure it's only 2 months anyways before I leave the country so I'm not investing a huge about of time. Maybe it is a defeatist attitude and maybe I will regret it. All I know is that everything I have ever regretted have been the things I DIDN'T do. There is a real possibility that I will have my heart broken and that I will be sad and that I will leave this country on a low instead of a high. There is also a real possibility that I will learn from him and also come to discover more things that I do want in a life partner. Coming from someone who has not dated a lot and who's longest relationship was 10 months, I feel like with every new person I meet there is something new that I learn about myself and about what I want in a partner. As crass as this might sound, I sort of see my time with this guy as a learning experience. He teaches me a lot, is very sexually open and has been in long term relationships. I'm already learning how different he is compared to my ex and things that I thought were normal in a relationship, I'm realizing now that it isn't necessarily "normal" and that what I accepted in my last relationship, I shouldn't have to accept when looking for my life partner. That there IS someone who can give me what I want. While this guy isn't everything that I want, he is what I want right now. I've already learned a lot about myself and about what I want in a partner just being with him for 2 months. I'll suffer the pain later...or maybe I won't. I guess I just feel like if I were to die tomorrow would I have regretted not spending time with this guy? And my answer was Yes. At the end of the day we can rationalize anything I suppose. haha.
mortensorchid Posted January 30, 2014 Posted January 30, 2014 I've been there as well (not quite your circumstances, but otherwise). As long as you know where you stand, what's wrong with being with someone for a while? You might learn things about one another, you might have a good time, you might be happy. What's wrong with being happy? Although you have pointed out a few things here (which involves your moving back to your home country) which others may or may not have to deal with, I find that so many people are so bent on thinking "where is this going?" when they have barely know each other a few weeks. It could take YEARS before you see the true person before you. Unless the person does something really horrible in the first few weeks, you should take the time out to get to know one another before you do start thinking in said terms. 1
SmartDude Posted January 30, 2014 Posted January 30, 2014 Unhappiness is caused by a belief in permanency. Nothing lasts forever. Stars explode into cosmic dust, flowers wilt, day turns into night. Relationships are the same way, even long term ones. You can cause yourself a lot of grief if you sit there wondering about every lover you meet, thinking: "are they the one?". Perhaps this relationship is exactly what you need right now. 2
somedude81 Posted January 30, 2014 Posted January 30, 2014 Yup, I'd date somebody when I know there is no future. Why? I hate being single and life is so much more fun with a partner.
pickflicker Posted January 30, 2014 Posted January 30, 2014 Dating someone when there's no future is a waste of my precious leisure time I could be spending doing other things.
Recommended Posts