truth_seeker Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Edited to add:.She does sound like a total b word for stringing you along though. But you still did ut to.yourself The OP was very into her and the girl wasn't into him as much but enough so to let him spend his money on her. The best the OP can do is learn from this experience and not get used again in the future. The girl should have been direct with the OP and not use him for dates to get dinner and entertainment out of it. OP was a sucker and the girl is a shallow b-tch. If the OP is hellbent on getting revenge (which I do not recommend) he should take her out to a very expensive restaurant, order expensive items off the menu for dinner and dessert, and when the dessert is brought to the table, excuse himself to the bathroom and walk out. Leave her with a $200-300 bill to match all he spent on her for their previous dates.
d0nnivain Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 No I'm not unbalanced. Just not very experienced (look at my name). And this just happened to me earlier in the afternoon so I am still seething. I could have done something else tonight, but I cleared it for her only for her to do this to me. You can have all the revenge fantasies you want. Wish heaps of bad karma on her. Just do not actually take revenge on her. Walk away. It's still relatively early; hopefully you can find some buddies to hang out with tonight. Go out. Have fun. Forget her & move on. Happiness & success are the best revenge. Find a new GF who does make you happy.
lollipopspot Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 The OP was very into her and the girl wasn't into him as much but enough so to let him spend his money on her. The best the OP can do is learn from this experience and not get used again in the future. The girl should have been direct with the OP and not use him for dates to get dinner and entertainment out of it. OP was a sucker and the girl is a shallow b-tch. I don't see why she's a "shallow bitch," and I don't really see why he's a "sucker" either. But I especially think calling her a bitch is uncalled for. They went out 3 times, and at some point she apparently decided she wasn't that into him. I don't get that she was stringing him along. She might even like him but she's working and going to school so she's really busy. He doesn't have to pay in the future, or if he wants to, he doesn't have to take her to expensive places. Any time a female allows a male pay for her while she's trying to figure out if she's into him, she's a "bitch?" 1
FitChick Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 If you take revenge, don't you think she will tell every woman within ten miles what you did? You will never get another date with anyone. I agree with posters who said don't spend a lot of money on someone you've just met.
Barbarossa Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 And that right there is my issue with dating. After a guy spends money on her it doesn't even mean that she will feel the same. And now I guess the OP is supposed to spend even more money on someone else where the same thing can happen again? I would say yes the OP is supposed to spend more money on someone else. You have to spend some cash if you want to play the game. She didn't ask him to drop bills he decided to. I don't particularly like the financial expectations of dating but what other choice do we have
Author datingnoob93 Posted January 19, 2014 Author Posted January 19, 2014 eh youre right I shouldn't have posted all that stuff a lot of it was in rage. I still need to get even though it feels terrible to be strung along and get absolutely nothing out of it. Main lesson I learned is never pay 100% anymore at least if it doesn't work out they are also loose.
MidwestUSA Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 OP, is this the girl you've posted about numerous times? The one who wanted an ice cream date for date #4? I understand that you were into her, spent a lot of time trying to figure her out, and are therefore disappointed and frustrated. Make a list of inexpensive things to do in your area. You don't have to spring for dinner/movies every time. You're gonna be in school a LONG time, so get on board with budget friendly date ideas now. I won't even tell you how bad it's gonna be in residency. Where I worked, residents often dated (and married) other residents. I'm sure the hospital cafeteria often sufficed as a 'night out'. And there was plenty of sex in the call rooms. Good luck on your career path.
NYC-BigKat Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 I need to figure out how to get back at this girl I have been dating. I've spent over $200 taking her out 3x over the last SIX WEEKS and all I've gotten is a quick kiss. She is very nice in person and she's hot but between dates her behavior is downright disrespectful. She never calls or texts first. I almost never reach her by calling. She takes forever to respond to text, and gives me one word answers. She flakes and cancels dates over and over again. There was a period of 2 weeks of complete non-contact last month when she went out of state without telling me, and was completely rude when she finally responded to all my texts asking her if she's okay, merry Xmas, Happy new year, etc. I feel like she is just using me and treating me like a doormat. I was supposed to meet up with her earlier in the week but she canceled because she had to "stay over at work". So instead we made plans for today but the very last minute (while I was driving to her house) she canceled again because she has to "take the dog to the vet." Its great how she likes her stupid dog more than me. I've put up with it so far cause I know she has 2 jobs and also goes to school with a full credit load. We are both pre-health majors and have to study extremely hard to maintain 3.7+ GPA's. So yes I know that free time is at a premium for her. But it's also at a premium for me, and it's insulting to me how she thinks her dog is more important. I responded to her last text with "hope ur dog's okay maybe we can go out later?". But I'm done with this chick. Not only that, I feel so incensed that I looking to take revenge. I don't mean physically or anything illegal, just looking to give her a hard time. I'm thinking about taking her out to a really expensive restaurant next time, ordering the most expensive dishes on the menu, and then just leaving her there. She'll have to pick up the tab and take a cab home. Or maybe posting her full name, picture, email, and phone number on websites of ill repute. That's sure to haunt her when she applies to professional school ! Any other suggestions on how to mess with her ?? I need to teach this disrespectful chick a lesson. I know u feel terrible about being used by a really really pretty girl 'cause I had it done to me a bunch of times & it sucks a lot. What I do is just cry & then eventually I start over again even though it doesn't get better but I cant live with hurting someone u know. The most I did to hurt a girl was I smacked a cell phone from a girl's hand a few yrs ago. I felt really bad for doing that so I know I'm not capable of much harm.
WP4046 Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 OP the only revenge you can do at this point is scheduled another date and if she agrees to go just don't show up and don't answer her calls when she calls to fins out why
angel.eyes Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 (edited) eh youre right I shouldn't have posted all that stuff a lot of it was in rage. I still need to get even though it feels terrible to be strung along and get absolutely nothing out of it. Main lesson I learned is never pay 100% anymore at least if it doesn't work out they are also loose. Sorry you're hurt, but the lesson is don't pursue to the bitter end women who clearly show by their actions they have no interest in dating you. She never took your phone calls. She was erratic in getting back to you when you texted her. She went silent on you for weeks. She avoided finalizing dates, and when you would occasionally corner her into one, she generally flaked anyway. Two people have to like each other. It's not just about how you feel. Your enthusiasm can't make up for the other person's disinterest. If you're constantly struggling and fighting to get someone to date you, abort. That's the lesson. Not get pissed and waste time plotting revenge for your bad choices. All you're doing right now is hurting yourself further. Go study or go out with your friends. Edited January 19, 2014 by angel.eyes 2
MrCastle Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 OP I have an alternative to just ignoring her and moving on. You can tell her the f*ck off. This will burn a bridge, but: 1.) At least you get your frustration out 2.) Maybe it'll give her the kick in the pants to change her ways for the next guy. I mean, really, when the last time a man stood up and let a girl know what she did was unacceptable? That almost never happens. Anyway, if you do decide to do that, don't call her names, or do anything else offensive or uncalled for. Tell her very plainly "you know, I don't appreciate going out of my way to see you and do these things for you, when your ability to text me back, set up dates, etc etc is lacking. If you want to end things, let's just end things. I don't care for the situation we have going now."
InnocentMan Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 MrCastle seems to be losing his **** in this thread. Have you just spent $200 on a broad, bro? Let it all out. Why should the OP care how she treats the next guy who can't take a hint? He needs to sort his own **** out, not worry about how some woman behaves, that he's had 3 dates with. 1
MrCastle Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 MrCastle seems to be losing his **** in this thread. Have you just spent $200 on a broad, bro? Let it all out. Why should the OP care how she treats the next guy who can't take a hint? He needs to sort his own **** out, not worry about how some woman behaves, that he's had 3 dates with. I'm trying to come up with a happy medium for this fellow. My first post to me, is plan A, but if that's not an option, I think plan B is a nice middle ground. Tell her off, blow your steam, and move on. As long as it's not "revenge" or something else extreme, it's alright, in my opinion. Don't underestimate how incredibly awesome it is to tell someone exactly how you feel.
Author datingnoob93 Posted January 19, 2014 Author Posted January 19, 2014 OP, is this the girl you've posted about numerous times? The one who wanted an ice cream date for date #4? Yep that's her. I keep posting about her. She's that difficult one. Again I haven't dated many girls but nobody acted like this. Many posters told me before she's not interested and I really should have listened. But then again she does throw a bone in my direction every now and then just to whet my appetite. don't pursue to the bitter end women who clearly show by their actions they have no interest in dating you I really wish that girls would make it known. I mean, what's wrong with saying, "It was nice meeting you but I don't think we're right for each other" ?? That's what I say when I'm not interested. I don't string people along. And I'll gladly back off if she says something like that.
BlametheIrish Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 (edited) MrCastle seems to be losing his **** in this thread. Have you just spent $200 on a broad, bro? Let it all out. Really? All I see is a different prospective. Why should the OP care how she treats the next guy who can't take a hint? He needs to sort his own **** out, not worry about how some woman behaves, that he's had 3 dates with. OP.while this is put rather bluntly, it makes a lot of sense, ehat you might want to.gather from a goid portion of these posts is... You choose how her attitude affects you, you also choose how much you're willing to put up with. Women who treat you like that are not worth chasing And life is full of moments where revenge might seem.quite appealing but it's not the mature way to.go about things And a bunch of other valid points in this thread you should take to heart. I'm not summing them all up because my clear onion soup is done Edited January 19, 2014 by BlametheIrish
MrCastle Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Op also remember -- always judge people by their actions. Not their words.
lollipopspot Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Yep that's her. I keep posting about her. She's that difficult one. Again I haven't dated many girls but nobody acted like this. Many posters told me before she's not interested and I really should have listened. But then again she does throw a bone in my direction every now and then just to whet my appetite... I really wish that girls would make it known. I mean, what's wrong with saying, "It was nice meeting you but I don't think we're right for each other" ?? That's what I say when I'm not interested. I don't string people along. And I'll gladly back off if she says something like that. She may not know herself what she wants, so is unable to be clear about it or just wants to see if any more interest develops. If YOU were clear about your character though - wanting to punish her by posting crap on the internet about her so it would hurt her future school chances - I'm sure she would get very clear on you very quickly. She is OBVIOUSLY not that into you if she can't make time for you though, even if she's conflicted. And other people told you too. Yet you by your own choice spent money on her, and now are riling people up to call her a bitch and you're thinking of ways to damage her life. Good job guy. Reconsider the helping field.
Author datingnoob93 Posted January 19, 2014 Author Posted January 19, 2014 MrC-I probably should have made my displeasure known the minute she texted me. Instead I left the door open for her by saying "maybe we can go out later." Its gonna look kind of weak if I follow that with a rant she's probably going to think that I've been brooding over this all day (which I have been). OP the only revenge you can do at this point is scheduled another date and if she agrees to go just don't show up and don't answer her calls when she calls to fins out why Yeah man thats a great idea. Get her to go on another date, or better yet, meet me somewhere. I won't show up. And she'll call and call and text. And an hour later I'll text back: "what goes around comes around !" Still won't be as satisfying as leaving her with a bill at an expensive restaurant right before dessert though.
isisisweeping Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Yeah man thats a great idea. Get her to go on another date, or better yet, meet me somewhere. I won't show up. And she'll call and call and text. And an hour later I'll text back: "what goes around comes around !" Still won't be as satisfying as leaving her with a bill at an expensive restaurant right before dessert though. You're going to look just as weak and brooding doing that, just so you know.
WP4046 Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 MrC-I probably should have made my displeasure known the minute she texted me. Instead I left the door open for her by saying "maybe we can go out later." Its gonna look kind of weak if I follow that with a rant she's probably going to think that I've been brooding over this all day (which I have been). Yeah man thats a great idea. Get her to go on another date, or better yet, meet me somewhere. I won't show up. And she'll call and call and text. And an hour later I'll text back: "what goes around comes around !" Still won't be as satisfying as leaving her with a bill at an expensive restaurant right before dessert though. you don't have to say anything, just ignore and fade away
deathandtaxes Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 You don't teach her a lesson. You need to teach yourself a lesson. You need to ask yourself why you kept asking her out after her continuing flakes? You have nobody to blame but yourself in this situation, OP. 1
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