snowyangel Posted January 17, 2014 Posted January 17, 2014 Ok we have been friends for quite a while. I thought we were building to more but he said he only wants a friend with benefits. I told him I couldn't do that. How do I get him to want more. I really care for him. He has been through a divorce in the past and I think he is afraid to travel that path again.
CarrieT Posted January 17, 2014 Posted January 17, 2014 How do I get him to want more. You don't. You cannot *get* another person to want or feel anything they don't want to. I really care for him. I think you care for what you HOPE you two could be as a couple. If he has no feelings for you, then it is one-sided and just having sex with him will only backfire. He has been through a divorce in the past and I think he is afraid to travel that path again. Then it is a path he has to travel alone... Or with any girl that is willing to give it up without a commitment. Don't be that girl or you will be the one he throws over when he does decide to commit to someone. 6
nescafe1982 Posted January 17, 2014 Posted January 17, 2014 You don't. You cannot *get* another person to want or feel anything they don't want to. This. You can't control other people. What you can do, though, is control your actions here. If you don't want what he's offering, put some distance in this friendship. Protect your feelings until you can move on to someone who is more available to you. Never settle for less than you want.
Eggplant Posted January 17, 2014 Posted January 17, 2014 Forget about him, move on, date other people. If you mean anything to him, he won't let you go. If you don't, you'll be on the right track. It's a win-win.
saltyfishhead666 Posted January 17, 2014 Posted January 17, 2014 Ok we have been friends for quite a while. I thought we were building to more but he said he only wants a friend with benefits. I told him I couldn't do that. How do I get him to want more. I really care for him. He has been through a divorce in the past and I think he is afraid to travel that path again. You can't MAKE someone want the same thing that you want. He's been quite clear. He want's you in bed and nothing else. Don't make excuses for him about his past he quite simply doesn't want any commitment at least not with you anyway. Not soomething you want to hear however we women make far too many excuses for men. He say's one thing and concoct another idea he's actually meaning. We've all done it. Listen to exactly what he is saying. If you go about trying to convince him to "want more" the only one that will get hurt is you
nescafe1982 Posted January 17, 2014 Posted January 17, 2014 Give his offering a shot, after a while he will start to see that you mean a lot to him and he will develop feelings for you pretty fast. -_- (10 characters) 2
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