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Is a man more desirable if he already has a Girlfriend?

barbossa

By barbossa
in General Relationship Discussion

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barbossa Established Member

barbossa

Posted
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If a guy already has a girlfriend and talks to you/ flirts with you is he more desirable than a single guy?

 

1 girl already can stand him and wants him to be with him-- so he must be somewhat desirable VS the single guy that no one wants?

 

We all want things we can't seem to get so, if a guy is unavailable (to you) Is it not more of a challenge to see if you can get him?

 

Guys have you experienced this?

Woggle Established Member

Woggle

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To many women yes.

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BlametheIrish Established Member

BlametheIrish

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Men who.are in a relationship hold zero appeal to.me. Why would I want to.steal.a man.ftom someone, I.would never be happy with a cheater.

 

The type of man who has a woman yet flirts with other women.constantly or tries to screw other woman doesn't deserve to be in any kind of relationship. Men and women like that simply disgust me.

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Philosoraptor Established Member

Philosoraptor

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Men, particularly men with issues obtaining a relationship, show a renewed confidence and happiness when in a relationship. Which in turn makes them seem more desirable to a woman.

 

He's not really any different than before. Just happier and in some cases much less bitter.

 

On the other hand some people do find desire in a challenge and with someone who has already shown the willingness to commit. But why would any woman think a man they could steal away couldn't be stolen away by someone else?

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mammasita Established Member

mammasita

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More confident, even more attractive. More desirable, i.e. desired by me.....heck no.

todreaminblue Established Member

todreaminblue

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if a guy has a girlfriend and flirts with me i feel uncomfortable...ill ask about the girlfriend bring her into the conversation...to me thats giving notice....you are taken...its a turn off for me....no chance no future....so being taken means hands off......mind g rated...dont flirt with me ...deb

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Hopeful30 Established Member

Hopeful30

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To me he would be LESS desirable. I don't find it an attractive quality when a man flirts and hits on other women when he's consciously made the decision to be in a monogamous relationship.

 

It's attractive when a taken guy is committed to his girl. It shows maturity. And THAT'S desirable to me.

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Sweetheartt Established Member

Sweetheartt

Posted
Posted
If a guy already has a girlfriend and talks to you/ flirts with you is he more desirable than a single guy?

 

1 girl already can stand him and wants him to be with him-- so he must be somewhat desirable VS the single guy that no one wants?

 

We all want things we can't seem to get so, if a guy is unavailable (to you) Is it not more of a challenge to see if you can get him?

 

Guys have you experienced this?

 

 

As a girl I get it all the time & its ****ing ridiculous. Sometimes I don't even have a bf but I say I do & gawd it doesn't work at all so saying I'm single is only gonna make it worse I think.

BlametheIrish Established Member

BlametheIrish

Posted
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I wouldn't make such a blanket statement as him but I can attest to the fact that since I have a wedding ring I get more women blatantly hitting on me than I ever did when I was single.

 

Well some women lack morals, as do some men. Just because.there are so many awful.bitter men in this world doesn't make me hate men in general. Just makes me love the good ones even more :)

ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

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No. I don't bother with men in relationships. If he approaches me, he looks sleazy, not desirable.

regine_phalange Established Member

regine_phalange

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Ive met twice shameless engaged guys who see me as an "idea" rather than a person. I can't respect someone who is taken and flirts around. I mean, really? What kind of impression do they think they make?

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Mrlonelyone Established Member

Mrlonelyone

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Yes. Late last year, for a time, I wore a peculiar hair clip belonging to my ex on a chain around my neck (along with keys). Women would give me their info without me asking.

 

 

As one dating guru puts it "Kitty Kats Kompete"

Scales Established Member

Scales

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Absolutely yes. The fact that other girls have proved this guy to be valuable just increases their mating value. Girls want the best guys. The best guys are usually taken. Other factors why they are the best guys obviously play a large roll, but them being taken only fuels the fire that they are special and better than "all the other guys".

  • Like 1
todreaminblue Established Member

todreaminblue

Posted
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Yes. Late last year, for a time, I wore a peculiar hair clip belonging to my ex on a chain around my neck (along with keys). Women would give me their info without me asking.

 

 

As one dating guru puts it "Kitty Kats Kompete"

 

 

 

 

no not all the time.....like all men won't compete.......not all women want to compete for a man.......reminds me of strip club owners actually .......wife at home while they sit back and collect thousands and cracking on to anything with a kittykat...which is my word for vagina....like it better than pussy....and to me vaginas dont need to compete or share or jump hoops....they have their own magnetic ability hopefully attached to a woman of discernment and substance who doesnt need lamb off cuts....and waits for the prime sir loin

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RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

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Lots of men assume just because a woman is nice to them, that she is hitting on them.

 

 

Hence the myth that having a girlfriend makes them more desirable.

 

 

I agree with the other poster, that a guy with a girlfriend is generally happier and more pleasant. Less likely to try to get my phone number or hit on ME when I'm just trying to be nice... which makes it easier for me to relax around them.

 

 

If someone is happy, it makes it easier for other people to talk to them. Not to be construed with hitting on them romantically.

 

 

I've never competed for a man, and don't imagine I ever will. Even when he is single, I don't compete with others. He needs that kind of attention, he can get it elsewhere.

  • Like 1
Haydn Established Member

Haydn

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Well its odd this one. When i am in a relationship, (Like now). I do get huge amounts of attention from other women. Yes Robin i understand what you are saying about it been mistaken for something else. But to me the signals are pretty clear. `You are with another girl but i want you`. But thats just my experience, others may be completely different. But i am never swayed i am by all accounts loyal and faithful. (I am, no irony intended)

  • Like 2
iris219 Established Member

iris219

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No, having a gf makes a man I might be interested in undesirable.

 

Most men have gfs or wives so it's not some huge accomplishment.

Haydn Established Member

Haydn

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It is if you`ve seen who i managed to pull. (Joke). But this does happen. When i have been single its like being invisible. So yes what Robin said has some truth. Confidence and ease when with someone. I have always found women in relationships more attractive than single ladies. I dont think i am too strange.

I hope.

 

No, having a gf makes a man I might be interested in undesirable.

 

Most men have gfs or wives so it's not some huge accomplishment.

Eau Claire Established Member

Eau Claire

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No. Perhaps some girls 16 and under.

Haydn Established Member

Haydn

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Sorry, thats a response to? Lost in this thread now!!!!!!!:confused:

 

No. Perhaps some girls 16 and under.
Haydn Established Member

Haydn

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Ok i take that point but the women who know i am in a relationship flirt with me. I do not flirt back. This has been obvious to me since i was 14. Is every woman who flirts with me lacking something? I dont think so. But then what do i know.....:confused:

 

Ive met twice shameless engaged guys who see me as an "idea" rather than a person. I can't respect someone who is taken and flirts around. I mean, really? What kind of impression do they think they make?
Thegreatestthing Established Member

Thegreatestthing

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No I'm not interested in someone who is in love with someone else and therefore only mildly in to me.

ascendotum Established Member

ascendotum

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Well its odd this one. When i am in a relationship, (Like now). I do get huge amounts of attention from other women. Yes Robin i understand what you are saying about it been mistaken for something else. But to me the signals are pretty clear. `You are with another girl but i want you`. But thats just my experience, others may be completely different. But i am never swayed i am by all accounts loyal and faithful. (I am, no irony intended)

 

My experience and a number of my friends is the same as yours. Most of the times the women have known the guy is now attached. In these instances I'd say what scales's said ' other girls have proved this guy' would apply. Some of us were not exactly a smash hit with women, and could go for periods greater than a year single, but when we had a gf, and now go back to clubs/bars we struck out at many week when single, and in short time now get a lot more attention/flirting. I agree with RR that friendliness is not flirting, but the jump up 'friendliness' and conversation initiation was so noticeable. Its like WTF, where were you with this spirit the last 12 mths I've been coming here. Some of us have had women that rejected us when single now come back and show definite interest (even just for sex when there was numerous opportunities when we were single...and again its WTF, where you with this enthusiasm when I really needed it). Surprised SD did not get this last year. That would have pissed him off. lol

 

Sometimes the interest came when the woman did not know one of us had a gf. I guess they somehow picked up that we were getting regular sex and was more contented/happy, but it was not overt. We weren't strutting around with chest puffed up with big grins. Nor did we change the way we looked much, and it certainly wasn't a case of not being bitter.

 

At many of the companies I worked at there was affairs going on (sometimes just supposedly) and pretty much it was always attached M with single F. The women were reasonably attractive and to me tended to be the fussy types, and I guess preferred to be a bit on the side for a good catch guy or try and steal him than wade through the single losers/players at venues.

  • Like 1
Ruby Slippers Established Member

Ruby Slippers

Posted
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I think it works both ways. When I'm a relationship, suddenly way more men are hitting on me! I guess it's because I feel happier and more relaxed and confident when I'm in a good relationship, and that's magnetic.

  • Like 2
StanMusial Established Member

StanMusial

Posted
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Yeah I doubt any women on here would admit it.

 

Any guy will tell you if you go out with a girl or two to the bars/clubs you will see a radical change in your treatment by other girls (vs going out with the guys). I think I figured that out by my first junior high dance.

 

Just pay attention and observe what is going on around you, guys. This stuff ain't rocket science. Dang.

  • Like 2
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