Hargrove Posted January 11, 2005 Posted January 11, 2005 Hi there. I am 19 years old and have never really dated before. I've met this guy who is actually very nice and has seemed interested in me and I want to get to know him better, maybe work toward a friendship. The deal is that he is my ferrier's (guy who trims my horses hooves) son. He is learning the trade and so I see him whenever he comes out to tale care of my horses hooves. Weird I know. He's pretty handsome but that is not the reason I like him. Actually the first time I met him he seemed to have no personality what so ever so I really thought nothing of him. After that first time he loosened up and started talking to me and I just felt really comfortable around him. Not to mention he is so great with my horses and I don't know many gentle men. I am never really myself around guys, but around him I feel just fine. He always starts conversation and I swear whenever I look up I catch his eyes already there. So he has recently asked me a lot of questions about trail riding. Like do I ride alone, where do I ride, etc. I thought this may mean he was interested in riding with me or something. I've been really holding off initiating anything because I have to see his father so much and I don't want to make the sitaution weird. But I really like what this guy is about and I finally just got up my nerve. So Sunday afternoon I finally called him and casually ask if he would like to go on a trail ride with me this weekend while some neighbors with extra horses are away. To many this may sound like a romantic date, but to horse people this is just what we do...we ride. Anyway, I got his machine and left a message. He called back that night and thanked me for keeping him in mind, that he had been wanting to go on a trail ride sometime soon, and that he would go. He said he was about to sit down and watch a movie and that he would call me back the next day (yesterday) and set up the details. He never called. I am kind of flipping out and feeling hurt. I know it's only been a day but why didn't he call? Did he forget? Or is he just trying to give some time? Is he going to call? Should I call back? What should I do and do you think he will ever call? Please help me! Amanda
Pocky Posted January 11, 2005 Posted January 11, 2005 I'd give him a few more days then call again. I'd leave a very casual message. "Just wanted to know if you still wanted to go riding. Let me know either way. My number is XXX-XXXX"
Author Hargrove Posted January 11, 2005 Author Posted January 11, 2005 Thanks a lot Pocky. Everyone keeps telling me not to call but I feel like after a few days I should be able to. I don't think it sounds desperate but a lot of people are telling me it is.
iceisles Posted January 11, 2005 Posted January 11, 2005 Originally posted by Hargrove Everyone keeps telling me not to call but I feel like after a few days I should be able to. I don't think it sounds desperate but a lot of people are telling me it is. I would do whatever feels right in your gut. People tell me not to call all the time, but it's just their own perspective based on limited information regarding my situation. If you have any doubts, then I would hold off. Just my two cents.
Hund1976 Posted January 11, 2005 Posted January 11, 2005 If its going to drive you crazy wait a few days and then call again."Just wanted to know if you still wanted to go riding. Let me know either way. My number is XXX-XXXX" This is a pretty good line. If he doesn't respond after that then try to forget about him. Hope stuff works out for you.
Author Hargrove Posted January 11, 2005 Author Posted January 11, 2005 Thanks a lot guys. I just don't see why he would have responded the first time and especially said yes if he then planned to never call. Especially knowing he has to see me again. Maybe he's honestly forgetful, but I always have my doubts. Thanks for the advice.
Author Hargrove Posted January 12, 2005 Author Posted January 12, 2005 Ok so he didn't call tonight either. Everyone is saying don't call, he's a jerk. I think I should just call again and remind him and get a straight answer.
iceisles Posted January 12, 2005 Posted January 12, 2005 I say go ahead and call. It looks like you're going to get split opinions on here, so just call if it's driving you crazy.
SoleMate Posted January 12, 2005 Posted January 12, 2005 Go ahead and do one more call, and keep it casual. The suggested wording is perfect. Keep telling yourself, "There are other men in the world, if this one doesn't work out I will be able to move on to another". But he sounds cute, and at least somewhat interested. Don't call more than one more time though, or you will start to feel rejected. He has been given notice that you have a friendly interest in him, so don't do all the legwork yourself. BTW, congrats to you for having the nerve to ask him out. It actually sounds like a perfect first get together - a way to develop a friendship, and then you two can see if you are interested in anything further. Shared interests like this are wonderful r/s glue if you get that far...
Eddie Lopez Posted January 12, 2005 Posted January 12, 2005 I say call just one more time and casually ask him if he still wanted to go. Just remember if worse comes to worse it's not like you asked him out on a romantic date.
Author Hargrove Posted January 12, 2005 Author Posted January 12, 2005 Thanks everyone. You've made me feel better about this.
Author Hargrove Posted January 13, 2005 Author Posted January 13, 2005 Thank you so much everyone. I called tonight and he was definitely still into going. He appologized all over himself and we made plans. I am exstatic.
Hund1976 Posted January 13, 2005 Posted January 13, 2005 Well good luck, hope he got over whatever was making him so wishy-washy.
Author Hargrove Posted January 15, 2005 Author Posted January 15, 2005 Yeah I think he is over whatever made him wishy-washy. Thursday night he called as promised. He was just supposed to say if the day we picked Wednesday night still worked since he had to check is schedule. He wound up talking to me for about an hour. I am not a talker especially on phones but he just kept everything going and it was great. We talked about everything under the sun and he's even invited me over. I hope the get together will go just as well.
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