iaa Posted January 16, 2014 Posted January 16, 2014 (edited) I have a five, going on six, year old son with a man I was in a relationship with for six months before I got pregnant. He turned out to be terrible. He did so many horrible things to me. I left him and moved away to another city when my son was seven weeks old. I had actually left him for most of the pregnancy and had only gone back for the last month before my son was born. I moved back home after two and a half years. When my son was three, I introduced him to his father. Since then we have only been meeting up occassionally with our son for visits. The whole time we were broken up he has sent me letters or called claiming to be in love with me still. He claimed he went into a deep depression when I left him and it took years to get out of it. I always ignored him. A few months ago he admitted to me that he had been in a relationship that lasted for a while. I was very happy to hear it. He said he loved her, but I wondered about that because he had always called claiming to love me. Less than a month ago he talked me into sleeping with him. Neither one of us are in a relationship, and I remembered that he was pretty good in bed when we were together. Since then we started spending quite a bit of time together with our son. I started having feelings for him again, and he claimed to have feelings for me as usual. I told him that I did not want to be with him again, as he has no job. He told me that was fine, but he didn't want me to sleep with anyone else because it would hurt him. I don't know what I was thinking, but I agreed to this and expected the same from him. About a week ago, I found out he was still spending time with the other girl. Someone told me they had seen them together. I asked him and he told me he was with her but they are just friends. Today, the same person that told me about them told me a bit more. I questioned him about something he was texting and trying to hide from me the other day on his phone. He let me read his messages to this girl. In one of the messages I found out he had given his keys to the girl. I had been wondering what happened to his keys. He also texted her something like, If you only understood what I have for you! I walked out of his appartment and he has been calling me all day telling me that there is nothing going on between them. The thing is, I'm soooo stupid for letting myself get involved with him again. I want to cry because I already miss him now, and I am sooooo hurt. Yet, we weren't really even together. I'm too embarrassed to even be with someone who doesn't pay his child support and wont get a job for that matter. I don't even want to tell anyone I know about how I feel, but I need to talk to someone. I feel very hurt. Edited January 16, 2014 by iaa
mantlefan Posted January 16, 2014 Posted January 16, 2014 Now you know what you need to do. You know this guy is no good for you or your kid. I wish things could work the second time around too, but you need to realize he is a lost cause. Don't feel bad that you wanted to give him a second chance though. Be rid of him, knowing you are doing the right thing for you and your child. 1
LadyM Posted January 16, 2014 Posted January 16, 2014 Don't be so hard on yourself. A lot of us here have given our exes second chances. I know I did and of course it was a mistake. We so much want to believe them and think that things have changed, but most of the time, that is not the case. What's important now is that you don't let him sweet-talk you back into his arms. You know the real him now and no more chances. The reason you miss him is because of physical connection. It makes us women not think so rationally. But take out the physical component and I think you will see that there is really nothing you miss about him. You deserve SO much better. Give it a chance and someone really wonderful will find you and you'll forget all about this loser. You will be fine....promise!!! 2
LostConfused123 Posted January 16, 2014 Posted January 16, 2014 Don't be so hard on yourself. A lot of us here have given our exes second chances. I know I did and of course it was a mistake. We so much want to believe them and think that things have changed, but most of the time, that is not the case. What's important now is that you don't let him sweet-talk you back into his arms. You know the real him now and no more chances. The reason you miss him is because of physical connection. It makes us women not think so rationally. But take out the physical component and I think you will see that there is really nothing you miss about him. You deserve SO much better. Give it a chance and someone really wonderful will find you and you'll forget all about this loser. You will be fine....promise!!! I love everything you said/wrote!! I second that! Especially that you deserve so much better and you WILL get it!! Someday you Will be cherished!!! (I added that part) ((hugs!!)) 1
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