deal breakers?

[superb]

I'm 35 first of all. What are your deal breakers when it comes to a relationship?

 

I found out that the man I was seeing had multiple sex partners in his recent past that were 19 ys old and it turned me off and freaked me out.

[Philosoraptor]

I have few deal breakers. I didn't date smokers, drug users, or addicts of any kind. I also didn't want to raise anyone's kid.

 

Most things outside of that are just judgement calls. Trust yourself to make the right decisions for you and your future.

[superb]

I won't date drug users or heavy drinkers also. I also can't cope with a man who isn't willing to share details of his life or past with me. Someone with multiple Facebook accounts that I cannot be on and someone who has secrets in general. (all relative to my recent relationship and break up)

 

I think women get so stuck on fixing the relationship that they ignore the red flags....I know I have.

[GoreSP]

As soon as a man says the words 'not' 'ready' and 'relationship' in a sentence, I'm out.

lol

[superb]

As soon as a man says the words 'not' 'ready' and 'relationship' in a sentence, I'm out.

lol

 

 

 

lol...yes...it's important to listen to what they're really saying....I've been there too and kept trying and it didn't turn out well.

[PegNosePete]

Some I've had recently...

 

Didn't have any friends except her exes

Never made eye contact

Kept a praying mantis as a pet (yikes!)

Constantly talked about weirdos she'd met on OLD

Had been everywhere and seen it all (and had a strong opinion about it all)

Wouldn't tell me which country she was from because I'd hate her (WTF?)

[superb]

Some I've had recently...

 

Didn't have any friends except her exes

Never made eye contact

Kept a praying mantis as a pet (yikes!)

Constantly talked about weirdos she'd met on OLD

Had been everywhere and seen it all (and had a strong opinion about it all)

Wouldn't tell me which country she was from because I'd hate her (WTF?)

 

Hmmm...wonder where she was from...lol

[salparadise]

I don't maintain a clearly defined list, just a good understanding of what I prefer. So after this I guess they will be more defined.

 

• honesty, openness, authenticity
  
• empathy, compassion, not judgmental
  
• flexibility; ability to see things from multiple perspectives
  
• strong sense of self, compatible values
  
• intelligence, emotional and intellectual
  
• carries her own water
  
• sexual compatibility
  
• doesn't freak out when we scrape the pegs a little
  

[superb]

Would it be weird to you guys if your partner who was in their 30's...had mostly sexual relationships with 19 year olds? Whether they're male or female.

[salparadise]

Would it be weird to you guys if your partner who was in their 30's...had mostly sexual relationships with 19 year olds? Whether they're male or female.

 

Yes. A woman in her 30s who has sexual entanglements with teenagers would definitely be suspect. A guy who does the same would be as well. It's possible he was just sewing his wild oats and now he's done and wants a real relationship with a woman near his own age, but I think you're right to view it as a red flag.

[Shepp]

hmm dealbreakers for me would of been...

• Doesn't get on with my family - like really get on with, not just tolerate
  
• Doesn't like my friends
  
• Doesn't like sport
  
• Is too uptight about everything / can't laugh at herself / freaks out about a little mud
  
• Doesn't like animals
  
• Doesn't want kids
  
• Looks down on people
  
• Cheating
  
• Drugs
  
• Doesn't look after her body