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Posted

so i was going out with a guy for about two months. he knew that i wads a virgin and that i wasnt sure wheni would be ready to have sex. he seemed totally fine with it in the beginning and was very supportive. but then as things went farther along he told me that he was scared because he was falling for me and that it was good because i was a nice girl but bad because we couldnt have sex. a little while after that he started pestering me about having sex more and more.we had only been going out for about seven weeks around that time. i didnt like the shift and i told him. i kept telling him that i wasnt ready. then he tells me a few days later that we have to go back to being just friends and not touching each other at al or kissing because he felt like he was teasing himself with me. he went on to say that he couldnt make me his girlfriend because we might not eve get the chance to have sex and that he wasnt used to being in a committed relationship without sex. when i asked him if he wanted to have sex with other girls he said no and that he wouldnt be having sex with anybody else.

I am confused. I feel like if he likes me as much as he says we should be able to be together without sex. it hasnt even been that long. i stopped talking to him but i really liked him. do i settle for being friends? was he just lying the whole time about liking me? did he ever really like me?

 

if more info is needed ill supply it

Posted

Once you have sex, it becomes an expected part of dating. When you date a new partner who hasn't had sex yet, some people think they will be OK abstaining. Your guy probably tried

 

 

His hormones were really raging & it became harder for him to abstain. He tried pressuring you, which is a typical response. When you stuck to your guns he figured out that he respects you too much to force you but doesn't love you enough to wait until you are ready. Translation: he's thinking with the wrong head.

 

 

I'm sure he did like you but he likes his own pleasure more. You two are just not in a compatible place right now.

 

 

Do not give it up to him to make him stay. As much as he uses the "if you loved me, you would" line, if he truly loved you, he wouldn't pressure you.

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Posted

I'm so proud of you for sticking to your guns and not giving into the pressure he's put on you. So many others would have given in and lived to regret it. You did the right thing. If he needs to be on his way because you won't have sex, you haven't lost much.

 

Keep waiting until you are really sure and very much loved. :)

  • Like 1
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Posted

thank you for the support but i really like him and i want him back. do you think he will ever come back to me. he said he doesnt want anybody else but i cant just be friends with him. will he ever come around to seeing things the way i do?

Posted

Probably not because he has his own agenda. Or he may come back and see if you've changed your mind. He might keep trying until he finds someone else who will give him what he wants most.

 

You are SO young and there are so many other guys out there who will respect your wishes and wait for you because they care more for you than their own needs. I know it's hard to imagine, but one day, you'll look back and be glad that he's out of your life.

Posted

If he comes back it would be for only one thing.

And no, he doesn't deserves that from you.

Keep saving it for someone who you really love and care about, and who makes you feel the same no matter what.

(I'll save it too). :)

  • Like 1
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Posted
You are SO young...

 

how do you know how old i am?

Posted
how do you know how old i am?

 

I assume if you're a virgin, you are in your teens or twenties and to me, that is young.

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Posted

oooh ok i thought there was like a place where they tell your age or you were like psychic or something lol.

i am young but i feel old for a virgin...

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