seekingpeaceinlove Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I've fantasized about this day since the break up but you know? He'll have to wait. I'm open to friendship but not right now. I'm not ready. How do I know? 1.) I still want him to bang me silly 2.) It would kill me if I found out he was dating I'm in a great place right now, 5 months post-BU. I've accepted that my ex is not the right man for me and I'm back to my old confident, ambitious, positive self again. As much as I want to show him how well I'm doing and show off my newly toned body, I just can't. I still have love for my ex and I can't risk doing anything that'll hamper my progress. A few months ago, I would've jumped at the chance to see him again. Here's to progress! 10
Haydn Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 no no no no. Good good good good. PM me before you do anything that will set you back.........And tell me about your new toned body and how i can get one?! I've fantasized about this day since the break up but you know? He'll have to wait. I'm open to friendship but not right now. I'm not ready. How do I know? 1.) I still want him to bang me silly 2.) It would kill me if I found out he was dating I'm in a great place right now, 5 months post-BU. I've accepted that my ex is not the right man for me and I'm back to my old confident, ambitious, positive self again. As much as I want to show him how well I'm doing and show off my newly toned body, I just can't. I still have love for my ex and I can't risk doing anything that'll hamper my progress. A few months ago, I would've jumped at the chance to see him again. Here's to progress! 2
flightplan Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Are you nuts? Throw away 5 months of loooong, hard work? IMO, give it more time. If he's serious, he'll wait. Just imagine all the garbage he put you through. If you can imagine him dating someone right now and know it'll kill you, then you're not ready.
pickflicker Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I've fantasized about this day since the break up but you know? He'll have to wait. I'm open to friendship but not right now. I'm not ready. How do I know? 1.) I still want him to bang me silly 2.) It would kill me if I found out he was dating I'm in a great place right now, 5 months post-BU. I've accepted that my ex is not the right man for me and I'm back to my old confident, ambitious, positive self again. As much as I want to show him how well I'm doing and show off my newly toned body, I just can't. I still have love for my ex and I can't risk doing anything that'll hamper my progress. A few months ago, I would've jumped at the chance to see him again. Here's to progress! Great work! High fives to you!
Author seekingpeaceinlove Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 Thanks, Pickflicker! (HIGH FIVE) I feel great that I'm able to resist meeting ex. I've come a loooong way and there's no turning back! Flightplan, agreed! I'm not meeting my ex! I posted to show that progress! Haydn, thank you, I will def PM you if I'm feeling weak and tempted to do something stupid. lol. In regards to the toning up..I literally worked my *ss off. I basically battled all of my emotions from the break-up by getting active. When I was sad, I'd go on a hike at the beach or my fave park and when I was angry, anxious, frustrated or yes, horny, I hit the gym HARD. I began eating well (cut out fast foods, increased veggie/fruits) to compliment my workouts. The results? I'm 25lbs lighter and have literally re-sculpted my body. Endorphin rushes are no joke. I'm not only happier but my energy is off the charts. 2
JDPT Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Save yourself future grief, you already know what do.
jphcbpa Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 how did the invitation come about? what is his intent with the lunch?
pickflicker Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Thanks, Pickflicker! (HIGH FIVE) I feel great that I'm able to resist meeting ex. I've come a loooong way and there's no turning back! Flightplan, agreed! I'm not meeting my ex! I posted to show that progress! Haydn, thank you, I will def PM you if I'm feeling weak and tempted to do something stupid. lol. In regards to the toning up..I literally worked my *ss off. I basically battled all of my emotions from the break-up by getting active. When I was sad, I'd go on a hike at the beach or my fave park and when I was angry, anxious, frustrated or yes, horny, I hit the gym HARD. I began eating well (cut out fast foods, increased veggie/fruits) to compliment my workouts. The results? I'm 25lbs lighter and have literally re-sculpted my body. Endorphin rushes are no joke. I'm not only happier but my energy is off the charts. In all seriousness, you're an example to others who are tempted by the first flash of their ex trying to get their attention. If there's anything meaningful to be had, he can wait until you're ready. This entire thing is on your timetable. And if you never want to speak to him again, then that's fine too.
lolitahaze Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I've fantasized about this day since the break up but you know? He'll have to wait. I'm open to friendship but not right now. I'm not ready. How do I know? 1.) I still want him to bang me silly 2.) It would kill me if I found out he was dating I'm in a great place right now, 5 months post-BU. I've accepted that my ex is not the right man for me and I'm back to my old confident, ambitious, positive self again. As much as I want to show him how well I'm doing and show off my newly toned body, I just can't. I still have love for my ex and I can't risk doing anything that'll hamper my progress. A few months ago, I would've jumped at the chance to see him again. Here's to progress! I'm your fan right now, I just read the thread you started when you were suffering from your BU and seeing what you posted today makes me hopeful. Maybe in a couple of months I'll be there too. i would like to be in your shoes...being strong enough to say NO to him. My ex and I also had the strongest sexual attraction, so I get you...you did great ignoring him because I saw my ex just once after the BU and I got burned! we ended up having sex, it was amazing though... but the next day i felt like crap because I was just that...sex, no second chance no nothing...So yes, good for you! Keep it up!
Author seekingpeaceinlove Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 Ex has been initiating light contact since the break up. Nothing big, just Hi, Happy B-day, Merry Christmas etc. In the last month though, the tone of the messages have changed a bit..little more than just cordial. I have no interest in getting back with him so the messages give me an ego boost but nothing else. I have no idea what his intentions are but I suspect that he's missing the sexual connection we had. As much as I want it too, I know myself and how much it'll mess with my emotions, so I'm choosing to stay away. how did the invitation come about? what is his intent with the lunch? 1
ponchsox Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Why not find another great guy to date and bang silly?
Author seekingpeaceinlove Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 Thanks, Lolita, you will get here too. I have to say, the fact that my ex also kept NC for a while helped so much. I'm not sure where I'd be if he was saying he missed me, etc. Although my ex broke up with me, I am thankful that it happened the way it did. I wasn't happy in the relationship but I wasn't able to walk away. It's crazy when you love someone so much but know they can't possibly be the right person for you. I love him but I cannot be with him and I doubt he will ever change enough to be the man I need. So, I have no choice but to move on. Acceptance is freeing. Keep reading and posting, Lolita. This site was the best support system for me through my hardest times. I'm your fan right now, I just read the thread you started when you were suffering from your BU and seeing what you posted today makes me hopeful. Maybe in a couple of months I'll be there too. i would like to be in your shoes...being strong enough to say NO to him. My ex and I also had the strongest sexual attraction, so I get you...you did great ignoring him because I saw my ex just once after the BU and I got burned! we ended up having sex, it was amazing though... but the next day i felt like crap because I was just that...sex, no second chance no nothing...So yes, good for you! Keep it up!
Author seekingpeaceinlove Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 (sigh) I wish it were that easy! I'm far from being ready to date. Why not find another great guy to date and bang silly?
devilish innocent Posted January 14, 2014 Posted January 14, 2014 It's refreshing to hear from people who are objective about their own emotions and take the right steps to healing. I'm glad you're seeing dividends. I'm sure there'll be even more in time.
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