mhm407 Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I get so nervous around my crush - I get tongue-tied and I feel like I act like a complete spaz/idiot in front of him. I hope it's not quite as bad as I think but I'm positive it's noticeable to him. Is it a turn-off to a guy if a girl is clearly nervous around him? 1
DorkBreakfast Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I find it sort of endearing. But seriously, just relax. Most of us guys don't care if you're nervous. 2
acrosstheuniverse Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I wouldn't worry. Most people are nervous about first dates, hanging with people they have a crush on. It'll get better with time. Luckily I don't get too nervous and when I've been on dates with visibly nervous guys I can usually make us both comfortable, know what to talk about and how to make them laugh until they relax. I think that just comes from spending lots of my working life talking to new people! You might want to rethink using the word 'spaz' around him though. I'm not even the most politically correct person in the world but it is very offensive, referring to somebody who has cerebral palsy. It's no different to calling somebody a 'retard' or a racially offensive word. I'm not trying to be mean, just pointing it out in case you never saw things that way. You are of course free to speak however you like BBC NEWS | UK | Magazine | The s-word 1
MrCastle Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Absolutely love it. But then again, I like being in a position of control/power. What the nervousness relays to me is that I'm in a position of power. That this girl is into me without me having to do much. It makes me feel comfortable as I know she likes me for me and I don't have to jump through hoops to get her interested in me. Why is that good? Because I can truly be myself. Knowing that I have her highly interested, I can better take command of the situation. Instead of me being like "well uh, I don't know -- I want to suggest this date idea to a girl but she might not go for it," I say "this is where I want to take this girl and I know she'll love it because she digs me and no matter what I do she'd enjoy it." 6
Author mhm407 Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 (edited) I wouldn't worry. Most people are nervous about first dates, hanging with people they have a crush on. It'll get better with time. Luckily I don't get too nervous and when I've been on dates with visibly nervous guys I can usually make us both comfortable, know what to talk about and how to make them laugh until they relax. I think that just comes from spending lots of my working life talking to new people! You might want to rethink using the word 'spaz' around him though. I'm not even the most politically correct person in the world but it is very offensive, referring to somebody who has cerebral palsy. It's no different to calling somebody a 'retard' or a racially offensive word. I'm not trying to be mean, just pointing it out in case you never saw things that way. You are of course free to speak however you like BBC NEWS | UK | Magazine | The s-word Wow, I'm sorry. Didn't mean to offend anyone. I had honestly never heard that word used as a reference for someone with cerebral palsy. Thought it was just slang for a clumsy/nervous person. Edited January 13, 2014 by mhm407
acrosstheuniverse Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Wow, I'm sorry. Didn't mean to offend anyone. I had honestly never heard that word used as a reference for someone with cerebral palsy. Thought it was just slang for a clumsy/nervous person. No need to be sorry, that's kinda why I mentioned it. So many people use words like 'spaz' and 'retard' without even thinking about it, similarly when people say something is 'gay' when they don't like it. It's become such a part of our colloquial language that a lot of people don't even put two and two together and see where it comes from. Hence I figured I'd point it out because most people don't want to come across that way and aren't bigoted at all! Didn't mean to thread jack and you didn't offend me at all
regine_phalange Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 When I have feelings for someone my decollete becomes red and itchy. I usually say it's an allergy to my fabric softener.... 2
gaius Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 decollete Second thing I had to Google this month after cankles. You weren't the only one. I get the urge to be fatherly and relax the girl with some lighthearted humor if she seems nervous. If I even notice that is. PS Spaz is not offensive, carry on with it's usage. 2
regine_phalange Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Second thing I had to Google this month after cankles. You weren't the only one. I get the urge to be fatherly and relax the girl with some lighthearted humor if she seems nervous. If I even notice that is. PS Spaz is not offensive, carry on with it's usage. It seems that women have a broader vocabulary than men. That's nice of you!
Eau Claire Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 My boyfriend said I would look at him and then look down. I was over 50 but he says I acted like a 13 year old. He says I laughed at most things he mentioned, even those that weren't funny. 1
isisisweeping Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 You might want to rethink using the word 'spaz' around him though. I'm not even the most politically correct person in the world but it is very offensive, referring to somebody who has cerebral palsy. It's no different to calling somebody a 'retard' or a racially offensive word. I'm not trying to be mean, just pointing it out in case you never saw things that way. You are of course free to speak however you like BBC NEWS | UK | Magazine | The s-wor d Wow. I would never use gay or retard, but I've never thought about spaz. I had absolutely no clue that was its origins. I never really considered its origins. Thanks. 1
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