Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 It's almost 1:30a and I can't sleep. I haven't heard from my guy since 8:30p and I'm really worried. Around 4:30p this afternoon he messaged me that he got in an altercation with his neighbor. The guy was drunk and talking noise and tried to wrap a string around his neck. My guy said he shoved him and told him if he ever touched him again he would kick his ass. The guy went inside, but he always has a bunch of really shady characters at his house. I'm worried because we message each other through Kik and we were in the middle of a conversation when all of a sudden his responses just stopped. Kik shows that your messages have been read, and he hasn't read ANY of my messages since his last response at 8:30p. This is SOO not like him. Because we are somewhat LDR (85 miles away), we chat throughout the day. If we're not working, the longest he'll go is maybe an hour or hour and a half without sending me something. Even if he's busy, it will show the message has been read. He had his daughter's tonight and took them back to their mother's around 7p. I'm worried that something else may have happened with this neighbor and some of his friends. Crazy thoughts are racing through my mind, like maybe they were waiting for him to take the girls home and come back.He lives with his brother, so if something had happened to his phone, he could've used his brother's phone to message me or got on the computer and messaged me. I just feel sick to my stomach. I don't know his brother's number or how to contact him. I don't know if he's okay. I can't think of any reason he would not have contacted me by now other than that he's hurt. I have kids here, and he's too far for me to just jump in the car and drive over there. What can I do??
OpheliaSong Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 Can you alert the cops that there was an altercation and you need someone to check because you are so far away and frantic with worry? 1
Author Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 Can you alert the cops that there was an altercation and you need someone to check because you are so far away and frantic with worry? But would they let me know if something was wrong over there??
OpheliaSong Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 You wont know until you ask. I mean, just call the local sheriffs office or whatever, not emergency lines. Just tell them you were unsure of what to do and if they could to please call you back or even e-mail you. My dad is a cop and he would do it for someone who is scared for a loved one. 2
Els Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 But would they let me know if something was wrong over there?? The cops here will if you tell them that you are his partner, not sure about where you live. If his messages had just stopped, you'd usually need to wait at least a day before you can report a 'missing person'. But given mention of the altercation, it seems reasonable to contact the police. 2
Author Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 Thanks! I'm going to try and find a number. 1
Author Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 I got an answering machine.
MissBee Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I know the feeling. Sorry about it If it makes you feel better, none of the times I thought something catastrophic happened was it really the case. However, I know you won't feel better until you hear from him, so I'd wait it out and give a few more hours and see if he contacts you. If not, you can go the police route again. Hopefully he is okay and if he is, it's unacceptable for you to not have his brother's info, and you need to get that right away. How long have you been together? Esp when you're long distance it's only responsible and just makes sense, esp for situations like this, that your SO has some way of getting in touch with you via other people esp if the person is a relative who also lives with them. I always have emergency contact info for SO's - their bestfriend, parents, sibling, roommate, something, just in case and I always give them my sister and bestfriends' info as I am either gonna be around them or they will know my whereabouts or have ways to check on me. Again I really hope he is alright and if and when he contacts you please sort out the "emergency contact" info for the future so that you don't have to feel totally helpless but can shoot someone a text or give them a call if anything. 2
Author Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 He messaged me just after 6am. The a**hole fell asleep on me!! I'm relieved, but mad as hell now cause I stayed up till 4am thinking he was dead or in the hospital somewhere. We usually text one another and say, "Hey, getting sleepy," and say our goodnights. Now I have to start my Monday morning at work with 2 hours sleep and I have year end financial reviews to get through!! I just messaged him and told him to give me his brother's damned number and that I'm not speaking to him today. It's juvenile, but I'm super tired and cranky as sh*t now! He keeps sending me apologies. I think I'll let him marinate awhile to make up for it. Thanks for the tips everyone!
mutualove Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I for the life of me can never understand how some people can just "fall asleep" when in the middle of texting,PMing,... . To be honest since it has happened to me only once (way too tired,but had been way too tired many times before as well and still managed to reach the finish line) I just think they're lying.I wonder if this is normal for some people and it just tends to happen sometimes? Anyways I'm glad he's ok OP.And personally I won't tolerate this kind of behavior anymore if it happens more than a couple of times.I used to,in hindsight they came off as having a lack of respect.
whichwayisup Posted January 13, 2014 Posted January 13, 2014 I for the life of me can never understand how some people can just "fall asleep" when in the middle of texting,PMing,... . To be honest since it has happened to me only once (way too tired,but had been way too tired many times before as well and still managed to reach the finish line) I just think they're lying.I wonder if this is normal for some people and it just tends to happen sometimes? Anyways I'm glad he's ok OP.And personally I won't tolerate this kind of behavior anymore if it happens more than a couple of times.I used to,in hindsight they came off as having a lack of respect. If he was drunk, then yes he could pass out while texting. Olivia, he's sorry and has apologized, accept his apology and move on. Holding grudges and staying angry at him for this isn't good for your relationship. talk to him about being more considerate instead of ignoring his messages. 3
Author Smthn_Like_Olivia Posted January 13, 2014 Author Posted January 13, 2014 I couldn't really ignore him. He apologized profusely for making me worry. He said his back was hurting and he was tired and just lay down for a moment and somehow he was out like a light. This was the first time it had ever happened and was very out of character for him, and that's why I was so worried. He did message me the moment he woke up at 6am and gave me his brother's number in case something like this ever happened again. They are roommates right now. He would never just ignore me. Trust me. This man ADORES me like nothing I've ever experienced. I often say I could pick my nose and flick a booger at him, and he would say, "You are so cute!" I did tell him that he will most likely get a taste of his own medicine tonight since I'm functioning on only 2 hours of sleep today! He apologized again. He's a really good guy.
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