leah270 Posted January 12, 2014 Posted January 12, 2014 Hey guys, i'm new on here but just wanted a bit of advice. I've heard of 'the guy pull back' that happens at the beginning of a relationship and I believe its happened to me in my current situation. Met a guy online, we've met up lots over the past 2 months and have slept together twice. After the second time he seemed pretty distant and it was up to me to initiate contact all the time. Once i did contact him, he would be his usual self, asking about my day etc, but no longer asks to talk on the phone, which I find odd. I put this behaviour down to two things; he was either only in it to get laid, and now he has he's backing off, or he got a bit confused over what he wanted and backed off? I just dont know We are yet to go a day without contact since we met. Ive recently started to not initiate contact and to be fair if i dont text him, he will contact me asking if im ok and about my day etc. Is his distant behaviour normal, should I be worried?? Surely he wouldn't text if he wasn't interested? Any advice would help as I do genuinely like this guy a lot, and have started to develop feelings. Thanks
Shashasha Posted January 12, 2014 Posted January 12, 2014 That does sound very dodgy. I think you got it right - he got what he wanted and he is slowly trying to back away.. I sugguest going no contact and never messaging him again. Next time - try no to sleep with your date too early!
Thegreatestthing Posted January 12, 2014 Posted January 12, 2014 (edited) Yes distant behaviour,not initiating contact is always bad,it indicates no interest. They are fine not speaking to you. I do it for different reasons,but most guys will contact girls they like. I've never understood why guys pull away after sex. Don't feel sad about it,there is someone out there who will be very into you. Edited January 12, 2014 by Thegreatestthing 1
Author leah270 Posted January 12, 2014 Author Posted January 12, 2014 He didnt initiate contact for a week after sex but recently he has been initiating which is what I find so confusing?? If he's not interested in anything more with me i'd rather he just never text me again so atleast I know.
Aquanut Posted January 12, 2014 Posted January 12, 2014 We men will sometimes cycle in and out rmotionally even if we sre interested. There are even books that advocate doing this intentionally. We will often go off to our caves when we need to recharge after emotional things. Women often interpret this withdrawal as a rejection when all it really means is we are procesding things. If you've only known him 2 months I'm not sure you know him well enough to interpret his behavior. And clearly no one else on this board can either. You might try something novel like asking him. It's possible he's still thinking about where he wants to go with this.
Weezy1973 Posted January 12, 2014 Posted January 12, 2014 Hey guys, i'm new on here but just wanted a bit of advice. I've heard of 'the guy pull back' that happens at the beginning of a relationship and I believe its happened to me in my current situation. Met a guy online, we've met up lots over the past 2 months and have slept together twice. After the second time he seemed pretty distant and it was up to me to initiate contact all the time. Once i did contact him, he would be his usual self, asking about my day etc, but no longer asks to talk on the phone, which I find odd. I put this behaviour down to two things; he was either only in it to get laid, and now he has he's backing off, or he got a bit confused over what he wanted and backed off? I just dont know We are yet to go a day without contact since we met. Ive recently started to not initiate contact and to be fair if i dont text him, he will contact me asking if im ok and about my day etc. Is his distant behaviour normal, should I be worried?? Surely he wouldn't text if he wasn't interested? Any advice would help as I do genuinely like this guy a lot, and have started to develop feelings. Thanks The third option is that after getting to know you better, he realized that you two aren't as compatible as he first thought. It takes at least 2-3 months to really start to get to know someone. 2
winny Posted January 12, 2014 Posted January 12, 2014 Maybe he is doing the fade away thing... u can ask him if u want... but if he has already decided he would anyways go away today or tomorrow... He got back to you after a week, maybe because he was bored and nothing to do... Which guy will stay away from a girl he just recently started dating if he is into her... That going away into cave thing is BS, at the beginning of dating when you want to spend all your time with the new person. I would say be very careful with this guy... 2
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