Jjk Posted January 11, 2014 Posted January 11, 2014 (edited) me and my ex met in 7th grade and we dated all the way until our freshmen year of college, college was not a distance problem for us, as we still lived in our houses which is about 15minutes away. she broke up with me 4 months ago because she said she lost feelings and wanted to experience her college life. (she was a bit of a loser in high school, not much friends, never partied, etc.. so when she broke up with me she really became a party animal) and for the first 2 months of that we barely talked, i tried talking to her but she would ignore me, send me one worded texts and completely brush me off. after a while we started talking again and hanging out like we usually did, things were going well and then we started really hooking up and we became friends of benefits. a couple weeks ago she took a week long trip, and during that trip she kept saying how much she missed me and how she felt like she might want to get back together but not to get my hopes. the day she got back was new years eve, she came over to my house and celebrated with my family and i surprised her with a couple gifts from tiffany & co. well things were good finally and i asked her if we were back together and she said that we will be together when she decides that its time for us to try things out again. and then a couple days after that we were at her house and her sister asks us what we are? and she responds saying that we're dating again that kinda caught me off guard but i asked her after if we were together and she said yes. we were together for like 2 days and then we got in an argument about something, i was getting all mad and she was laughing and saying "dude its not a big deal" to me it was a big deal and by now really should have known that. so basically she texted me the next morning and i was still pissed and then we made up the morning after that we talk on the phone and she breaks up with me AGAIN saying that she really does not want to commit and deal with the arguments that come with being in a relationship. which completely broke me down again. so i tell her that this time i really cant be doing all of this and that i NEED to move on because i just keep getting hurt. she agrees says shes sorry and that she doesnt want me to cry because me crying makes her upset and all that ****. so we hang up the phone im like **** all this head down to my buddies house and get completely zooted and then she texts me saying im sorry idk what i was thinking this morning i take it back. and then im like uh what and she says read what i said and she said she wants to take it slow. and im like alright i forgive you because im a ****ing ****head and i guess i want to get ****ing played again. and i thought we were good again and then she tells me that we arent together but we're taking things slow and she'll see if she wants to commit and be in a relationship but for now she likes being independent and all that. so im like alright i understand and **** then we get in another argument and im like this time im really ****ing done and then we dont talk for a day and i cave in and text her and call her saying how much i miss her and all that ****, and we go back to hanging out and ****ing and all that but last night i told her how i felt about all of this and she said we'll talk about it later because she had to sleep. and now im lost because i really do love her, she was my first love. i want us to be together, all we talked about for 4 years was our future together and how we were gonna get married and **** like that. I want to move on because of how much ive been hurt so far, but at the same time i dont want to because i dont want us to just become a memory i want us to actually achieve all of our promises we made of being together forever. honestly not talking to her, and hooking up and talking to her knowing she doesnt feel the same same way both hurts so much, i know i have to move on but idk how too.. ive tried no contact and i just cant do it, and when we talk all my old feelings just gather right back up. Idk what to do. I love her i feel as if i always will love her, and she'll always have a special place in my heart. what do i do and how do i move on.. Edited January 11, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Author Jjk Posted January 11, 2014 Author Posted January 11, 2014 i NEED to move on, i know that deep inside i dont want too because she's still the love of my life, but i know that she doesnt feel the same anymore. no matter how much i want her she will never want to be with me again. so i need to move on, i just dont know how to
mantlefan Posted January 11, 2014 Posted January 11, 2014 Get rid of everything that will remind you of her, INCLUDING and ESPECIALLY talking to her or communication in any form. Block her on social media, block her cell number, consider blocking her email. Take away all pictures, letters, gifts she gave you that remind you of her. Throw out what you can, put what you can't throw out yet in a box in the attic or basement or something. Ignore her whenever possible, and if she confronts you, get out of there as quickly and coldly and politely as possible.
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