Kokoro-Fan Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 This is a serious question. Please read and maybe you'll get where I'm coming from. I don't really look friendly and a lot of times I don't go out of my way to talk to people or anything. If I'm in a small group at work then I'll feel more comfortable talking and coming out of my shell. We've had new people join our group and I do go out of my way to make them feel right at home. I do this because I already feel comfortable. However if I'm at school, more than half the time I won't really talk to anyone. If someone talks to me, good. It sometimes leads to a good friendship at school. But not always because I can run out of things to talk about depending with who I talk to even if we have everything in common. A lot of times people in general can just annoy me. I hate going out shopping, to the gym (unless theres only like 2 people), etc. because of people. I don't know why. I also see many stupid people that annoy me. I have a few people I can call friends. I only hang out with them like once or twice every couple of months though. A friend named Michael is nerdy but really enjoys going out, clubbing, drinking and partying. I rarely hang out with him because I am not into any of that at all. And when I have hung out with him just because I have nothing better to do, I get bored quickly. Another friend I have is Steve. He's also nerdy and I enjoy talking and hanging out but after a while, I get bored. Deep down I do want to have friends. I want people to talk to me on the phone, text me, and ask me to hang out. But I can't make friends. I don't know how I guess. At school I 'make friends' but it doesn't go beyond classmates. Basically we just talk at school and that's it. (there was one time I did make friends with a group and we hung out like twice a week for a few months but it was because I set up the hangout; when they did something I never got invited which pissed me off and I stopped asking them to hang out). I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I remember last year a classmate and I talked for an hour straight after class. He was going to give me his email to help me with an assignment but I asked for his number instead hoping we could hangout but he avoided giving me his number and we didn't exchange any number/email. But we were still friends. I only asked once and noticed the way he dodged it so I didn't bother with it again. I rarely ask anyone for their number. This also reminds me of a girl I asked out a while ago but rejected me eventually. She is shy but she became friends with the people I was friends with in our classes. Now I recently looked at her blog and noticed she was at a convention with one of our classmates. The weird thing is, they never talked when we had the same class together. Maybe they became friends in another class. But that's not the point. The thing that I'm wondering is, how did he do this? It is something I want to do. I don't know how to be a friend or ask people to hang out or whatever. I feel stupid for asking. I'm not that young either. I'm in my mid 20s. Is something wrong with me? I do spend a lot of time alone outside of work or school. I don't really go out much because there really isn't anywhere for me to go. I don't know about ongoing events or conventions (how do people even find out about these things?) I can't relate or even like the people in my town (I am very different). I don't really do much in life and I feel bored most of the time. I don't know any more. I do feel something is wrong with me. Lately I've felt like there is a big part of me that's missing. Since high school I have felt I've been living under a rock. A lot of people find out about this tv show, this song, etc. But I don't. I don't even know how people find out about these things. That's something I often ask myself. Any advice or feedback would be appreciate it. I feel lost. Thank you for reading. I am sorry for writing this very poorly.
d0nnivain Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Not everybody is a gregarious social butterfly. You don't have to have a room full of acquaintances; sometimes a few good friends is better. Smiling is the best opener. Another is to have common interests. Is there a group or club at school you can join?
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