sickoflove11 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Hey guys So I'm having a really low day today maybe it'll pass but what I can't seem to get over is the fact that he is over it.. I know it's done and we both need to move on, it's for the best. I want to be over it also and I'm really working on it but what's in my head the most out of everything is that after 6months of staying in contact after the BU he's just over it, done contacting me or anything. We are on good terms and then all of a sudden the new year came around and its like we both made the resolution for strict NC hah.. Don't get me wrong I know its probably whats best for the both of us to move on, go NC, and I feel like he already is talking to a new girl so I really need to get past this phase. Right now what's hurting me the most, what I'm stuck on, is knowing he is over it and has moved on. How can I get over that part when that's all I think about, and move on also..
Author sickoflove11 Posted January 8, 2014 Author Posted January 8, 2014 Maybe it's just something I have to figure out on my own, I don't have anyone I can talk to about all this. I was just hoping for some support. I don't know how to move past this right now.
LostConfused123 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Maybe it's just something I have to figure out on my own, I don't have anyone I can talk to about all this. I was just hoping for some support. I don't know how to move past this right now. You have come to the right place! We are all here for you and can understand your pain because we are in it too. You are not alone! I know it probably seems impossible but you should really stick to hardcore NC. Get rid of all reminders and triggers. You will have enough of those that are out of your control. No need to add to them. Block him from FB (if you have that) emails, phone, everything!! Disappear!! It's the only way. I'm not going to lie. It is going to be difficult and extremely painful for the first few weeks, maybe even months but it really does get easier. I NEVER thought I would feel better but it is magically happening and it feels so great. Kinda like I have been under water for weeks and can finally breathe. The anxiety is pretty much gone now (Thank God!!) That was awful!! We are all here for you!! You can message me any time. Best of luck my friend! ((hugs,!!)) 2
Author sickoflove11 Posted January 9, 2014 Author Posted January 9, 2014 Thank you LostConfused I hate that its so hard in the beginning it's hard to believe it will ever get better but I you are RIGHT. It will in time I just wish it didn't take so long or hurt this much to get there. I really will stick to NC because I already see him disappearing from me, he suddenly has stopped trying to contact me and I wish I had been the one to stop it. Today I still wake up thinking of him, but hoping it will fade soon enough I'm glad to hear that you are feeling much better! I will keep positive and remain NC!
margot13 Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 The worst part is accepting it's over!!! That moment when you realize those tiny little fantasies that linger in the back of your head about getting back together, when you realize it is just that, a fantasy... But hang in there you will be ok, it really is just a part of it all.
williesd Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 It will be easy one day, then it will be difficult. Ultimately, it's a slow process, but if you spend time with friends and family and improve yourself, it will get easier. The NC works to heal your loss. For me, there was a huge void at first, then weeks went by and it got easier. Reinventing yourself after the fact takes some creative thinking, but it can be done. Don't sweat it if it feels like two steps forward, one back on some days. I finally put up a profile on a dating site, thing that was interesting, it shows how many are online. Interesting, it said close to a half million people the other day. So remember, there's at least a dozen in the exact same scenario your in, different names and different exes, but they all feel the way you do. Also, write here, people here are in similar situations and here for moral support. Eventually you WILL heal. Also take the time to reflect and discover what it is you want for your future.
Sharpender Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 Everyone's advice is very good..."give it time, it will get easier." The only thing I would add is to try to stay busy, every minute of every day. It's the only thing that helps me. The second you feel yourself starting to think about him, do something. Workout, listen to some mind numbing music...Slipknot or Five Finger Death Punch works wonders, read a book, scream into a pillow...do whatever it takes to break the thought process.
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