Eggplant Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 One thing I loved about my ex was how affectionate he was always, including when we were out at a store or the park. He was always very close, hand-in-hand. We walked as a unit. When in a club, he was always half a step behind me, in protective mode. By contrast, I went on a few dates this past summer with a guy who would routinely leave me in the dust. I couldn't keep up. Never held my hand. He probably didn't like me. My question is: when out with your spouse, how close together, literally in space, do you keep? Does one of you walk ahead of the other? Is it every man for himself? Are you affectionate? 1
Eau Claire Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 My guy always holds my hand. Opens every door, etc. However, why would you expect a fellow who is not your partner to hold your hand? I would expect him to be courteous but that's all. Many men are conscious not to be too forward. I have found that if I like a guy that I need to give him a signal...I'll hold onto his arm in a busy setting, etc. This gives him the confidence to hold my hand.
Author Eggplant Posted January 7, 2014 Author Posted January 7, 2014 However, why would you expect a fellow who is not your partner to hold your hand?I don't. He wasn't my partner. But we went out together for a good 3 months. Nothing physical.
Grumpybutfun Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 I always walk on the outside of her (protective mode) and I lope rather than walk because she is five feet tall and I am over six three. I keep one of my hands on the small of her back. My protective mode is my affectionate mode, I think. Why? G 5
Eau Claire Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 I don't. He wasn't my partner. But we went out together for a good 3 months. Nothing physical. It's always difficult to know what happened ( or didnt). I admit I'm a pushover for a man's affection in public. There is something secure about my guy taking me by the hand through a crowd...he even treats me like a 5 year old ( in a nice way) when crossing a street. Nice to stop being mom and grand mom and know that your guy is protecting you. 3
Quiet Storm Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 My husband always walks on the outside, like Grumpy. I'm short and he's tall, too. He also always sleeps on the side of the bed closest to the door. 1
Author Eggplant Posted January 7, 2014 Author Posted January 7, 2014 Why?Surveying. I do know of an apparently happy couple, married 30 years or so, where the husband always walks half a block ahead of his wife. To each his/her own, I guess...
HokeyReligions Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 (edited) I always walk on the outside of her (protective mode) and I lope rather than walk because she is five feet tall and I am over six three. I keep one of my hands on the small of her back. My protective mode is my affectionate mode, I think. Why? G Awe. This is sooooo precious! My husband was like that. Its a simple gesture but had a profound impact. I didnt realize how much I missed it until now. Now when we are out I follow behind him because he has to use his scooter and there is seldom enough room for me to walk beside him. When I do I keep my hand around his shoulder and neck and sometimes run my fingers thru his hair. Sometimes he goosses me if I get in front of him. Edited January 8, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 3
Els Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 We either hold hands, or he puts his arm around my shoulder or on the small of the back. Obviously, this isn't viable in some situations, but it's what we do most of the time. I love how he guides me around rough steps or random puddles, too. I admit that public affection is a huge thing for me; I don't think I could go back to guys like my ex who shied away from demonstrating affection in public. Excessive kissing and making out would be a turn-off, but holding hands is just right, IMO.
nescafe1982 Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 My BF has incredibly wide shoulders. It makes riding in a plane and walking two abreast down the sidewalk a bit difficult. Typically I walk one pace behind him, my hand on his crooked elbow. Makes me feel like a classy dame... and I think he feels like it's a slightly protective stance. 1
Phoe Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 sometimes hand in hand, with him leading maybe half a pace in front. Other times with his arm around my shoulders, keeping me close, guiding me. 1
Els Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Phoe, every time I read about your new R, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Good on you, girl. You totally deserve this. 1
Phoe Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Phoe, every time I read about your new R, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Good on you, girl. You totally deserve this. AWW thank you Elswyth, I'm so giddy over him. 1
Emilia Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 The last few years I've mainly dated men who are similar height as me so we usually walk shoulder to shoulder while talking. Sometimes slightly further away from each other if it's a new thing but when it's an intimate relationship then we walk with shoulders/arms/length of body touching. In a crowd I'll walk according to what he is comfortable with, slightly behind him to let him lead the way or in front so that I lead the way. Flexible gender roles I don't really hold hands or things like that. It happens occasionally but PDA isn't that much my thing. A little bit while flirting but not constantly.
jadetiger Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 My partner likes to walk by my side and hold hands. Or to be exact, he likes me to walk by his side and hold his hand. He's only a centimetre or two taller so it's quite comfortable to hold hands. But when I wear high heels (which I do rarely), it gets tiring after a while. But I tend to walk a step behind him because there have been a few occasions where we're walking through a crowd and I feel like I'm going to collide with an oncoming person, or a rubbish bin or light pole. So I walk behind him to avoid being uncomfortably close to oncoming pedestrians and obstacles.
veggirl Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 We just....walk. I have never thought about it. We don't hold hands much. If we are in a crowd or something he will guide me but for the most part we just walk however we can get about. Sidewalks here are so narrow, most the time I'm walking in front of him.
Shepp Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 Haha I've really never thought about it. I guess it kind of depends on the situation. Most of the time I just walk alongside her. I guess like cause I we were friends form early teens i'm used to just strolling beside her in a normal walking style As long as we're walking somewhere fairly open without potential hazards to be walked into, then I tend to put my arm round her shoulders. I haven't really considered why, other than that height wise its perfect, and she talks with her hands making hand holding less practical. But then like if we're getting onto a boat or walking down a really steep slope obviously i'd take her hand and walk a little infront. I cant really say I ever walk behind her, maybe if we're somewhere super busy i'd kind of put my hands on her shoulders and like steer her, or like if she gets a sudden idea that she couldn't possibly stop to explain she'll like grab my hand and pull me wherever.
pink_sugar Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 A lot of times we don't walk hand in hand, but what makes it romantic is when he spontaneously loops his fingers with mine from time to time. Most people don't hold hands 24-7.
carhill Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 My question is: when out with your spouse, how close together, literally in space, do you keep? Does one of you walk ahead of the other? Is it every man for himself? Are you affectionate? IIRC, it was generally side by side or right rear quarter, behind my exW. Only in unfamiliar places where I sensed her apprehension would I formally 'lead' her. I liked behind because, well, she had a nice ass. I wasn't super big on PDA's but holding hands or 'guiding' her wasn't unusual. That's been typical for me with all my partners.
Ruby Slippers Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 I'm a hand holder. I would feel really weird walking around with my man without holding hands with him most of the time, or with my arm wrapped through his. This just feels right
Cakess Posted January 9, 2014 Posted January 9, 2014 Oh I definitely love affection in public with my boyfriend, so I love to hold hands, fingers laced. If we're dressed nicely however, I prefer to loop my arm around his. We're pretty close in height so we walk side by side, usually in-step too!
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