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Friend likes me, but I don't feel the same.


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Posted

I recently made new friends (2 guys in their 40s who are roommates), both whom I think are really wonderful to hang out with. Though we only met a month ago, we've spent a lot of time together.

 

One of the guys, recently called me before his birthday and told me he likes me. Being a 37 year old woman, I am pretty clear about the type of guy I want to be with, plus I am in a complicated situation with my ex. Needless to say, I am just not interested in him. So I told him that I wasn't interested and that there would never be any potential.

 

Whats even more confusing is that he recently said he was in love with a married woman, another girl he dated and also has a booty call (whom I've met). He also publicly announces to friends that he hates sex because he thinks it's gross. So, I don't understand why in dear lord he would also like me.

 

It's been nearly 2 weeks since this conversation happened and he has not talked to me. I wished him a happy birthday, but did not contact him on New Years. He hasn't said anything. I am wondering if this friendship is over?

Posted
I recently made new friends (2 guys in their 40s who are roommates), both whom I think are really wonderful to hang out with. Though we only met a month ago, we've spent a lot of time together.

 

One of the guys, recently called me before his birthday and told me he likes me. Being a 37 year old woman, I am pretty clear about the type of guy I want to be with, plus I am in a complicated situation with my ex. Needless to say, I am just not interested in him. So I told him that I wasn't interested and that there would never be any potential.

 

Whats even more confusing is that he recently said he was in love with a married woman, another girl he dated and also has a booty call (whom I've met). He also publicly announces to friends that he hates sex because he thinks it's gross. So, I don't understand why in dear lord he would also like me.

 

It's been nearly 2 weeks since this conversation happened and he has not talked to me. I wished him a happy birthday, but did not contact him on New Years. He hasn't said anything. I am wondering if this friendship is over?

Sounds like it is, just like it should be.

 

Once feelings are involved, it's pretty much impossible to maintain a friendship with somebody who does not want to be with you.

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Posted

Like the poster above said, it's most likely over. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing because once feelings are involved, the "relationship" dynamic changes anyway

Posted

If it's not over, it's at least on hold for a while. Sometimes, rarely but sometimes, a person can come back to friendship after unrequited love. He has to come to you. You can reach out with texts like Happy Birthday, would you like to come to my Super Bowl party but they must be very neutral, not flirty & sporadic.

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