devastated777 Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 (edited) I broke NC again. why? why? why do I do this to myself? I told him I was sorry that things were this way and I understood he did what he had to do but I sure didn't want to be enemies and I hope he was doing well and would hope he would want to know how I was. I also told him about one of my dogs and how I needed to take her to the vet. His only response was Hope S--- is ok and I miss M---. that is my other dog. I sent him a pic of him and said I knew you would miss him, he rocks. why am I so stupid?? I just cannot believe how I worshipped this man. Everyone envied our relationship. He would even tell me how we had to watch people because they would try to break us up because we were so happy. Then, he dumps me because he thinks Im cheating (that was his excuse, I think he was) Then World War III broke out and we texted below the belt things which I regret. But before that we never spoke a harsh word and really brought out the best in each other. I know, this is how he rolls (my friends have beat that in my head) but I really had him high on a pedestal. Feels like I am back at day 1. this sucks soooo bad. btw, the reason I reached out to him is because a girl that is friends with him "encouraged" me to. Said he wasn't happy and was talking about moving away. Edited January 7, 2014 by devastated777
barky2 Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 So you broke nc to apologize and put your tail between your legs for no reason after 4 weeks nc? Than, talked about your dogs? I mean with all due respect, what were you expecting? You have to understand something about most men dumpers, they don't notice you until you're moving on and happy. You seemed needy and clingy. Kind of like a middle schooler. I mean that with the upmost respect. Find your happiness, start moving on like TRULY moving on, and magical things will happen. Barky 1
Author devastated777 Posted January 7, 2014 Author Posted January 7, 2014 FML. I wish I had not done that. So. Bad.
polynomial Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 FML. I wish I had not done that. So. Bad. Hey, don't beat yourself up too bad. We've all, well, most of us, done it. I know I have and regretted it deeply afterwards. Hell, I've done it several times, each time regretting it. Just try to learn from this. Now you know contacting him gets you nowhere, so best try to move on with your life. Good luck 1
organizedchaos Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 Hey, don't beat yourself up too bad. We've all, well, most of us, done it. I know I have and regretted it deeply afterwards. Hell, I've done it several times, each time regretting it. Just try to learn from this. Now you know contacting him gets you nowhere, so best try to move on with your life. Good luck NNext time you consider breaking nc read this thread. 1
BC1980 Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 When I broke NC after 3 months, I think I was in denial. I was facing the prospect of actually moving on, and it scared me. I didn't cope with that reality very well, so I called my ex to try to stay in the past. Of course, at the time, all I thought was how much I missed him and secretly wondered if he had changed his mind. When you want to break NC again, you have got to talk yourself down. Go through the reasons you want to break it, and I can guarantee they will all be linked to not wanting to let go of the past. It's really hard to move forward, but you've go to talk your way through it. You have to let go because he already has. 3
Zahara Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 Sometimes it's good to get one last knock down. It will help you realize the importance of NC. Don't be so hard on yourself. At least you now know not to go down this route again. 1
Author devastated777 Posted January 7, 2014 Author Posted January 7, 2014 All you guys are awesome! I got all teary reading all of your supportive replies. I think BC is right. I have some guys who are great and we have been to dinner, out and messaging, etc. I am trying to put them on pause and time is running out. I am not interested. Scared to move on and wish they were him. I will read this thread next time for sure. Thanks guys.
barky2 Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 Explain to them you just want to go out and date. Take it slow. Make your intentions crystal clear. If they run away they were in it for the nookie. Don't bog yourself down and blow these people off. You must continue living your life. Barky
polynomial Posted January 7, 2014 Posted January 7, 2014 How long has it been since the break up? I'd say give yourself some time before putting yourself out there again. I could not imagine dating anyone right now (1.5 months since BU). I'm just giving myself some time to heal right now and maybe after couple of months things have improved.
Author devastated777 Posted January 7, 2014 Author Posted January 7, 2014 Barky, I am making my intentions crystal clear. I have one who wants to be exclusive and I tell him no way but I liked texting with him and enjoy his personality but I was definitely straight up with him. then found out he has cancer so he is in hospital for next 4 weeks. He is breaking away from me because again, he wants exclusive. A couple are totally ok with it. we just chat and text occasionally and meet out sometimes. Had my only one night stand about a month ago and felt like a total ho bag so that wont be happening again. After putting all that out there and seeing it, I realize I need to keep on working on myself. poly, I moved out on 10/26/2013. So, 11 weeks this Saturday. I've read a lot and they say go out, go out, go out. I have a blast when Im out but then I crash afterwards. gotta keep on pushing through.
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