LLQ1986 Posted January 6, 2014 Posted January 6, 2014 Hello all, I posted the following topic awhile ago and I would like to update the on progress of our relationship. As you might have read in the title bar, things did not work out the way I was originally planned and expected. AT ALL. So after his exam and with him going back to work, he wasn't that depressed anymore as work is a great distraction. Although he didn't talk as much as he used to, I took it as he was still in the recovery stage but everything was still alright. We talked throughout the days and until my bed time. Just 2 days ago, he asked for a skype session. I was glad that he finally initiated the webcam session. When I first saw him on the screen, he was sobbing like mad and he told me he's done something wrong; that he fell in love with another girl of whom he met over a colleague's party. She's still studying (a master's student) and is 2 years younger than both of us. He told me that sparks flew over a dinner; and they both have feelings for each other. Over the past 2 yrs + of our relationship, I had total trust in him because he would tell me things and girls who rumored to have a crush on him. He would tell me every single detail of his social life, where did he go, who did he hang out with (i know most of his close friends- even met them and are friends on social networking sites). His track record was flawless then. SO when he told me that, I was in tremendous SHOCK. I couldn't even cry because I couldn't really see the signs as we are 6000+miles away and we still talked like normal. He told me his heart asked him to go for her while his head said me, I know at that moment: THIS IS IT; we are officially finished. When I asked further, he said he has feelings for both of us and that he couldn't choose and let go either one. He even had this hilarious metaphor to describe his situation now: it's as difficult and impossible to choose between your parents. HOW LAME, I KNOW RIGHT. He kept telling me that they did not do anything; just strong feelings for each other. She knew that he had a gf but that didn't stop them for meeting up and sharing feelings. Up until yesterday, he told me when he's decided to confess to me, he stopped responding to her texts and calls. I was telling him, since they haven't started dating, why can't he just let her go and come back to me, he then said the feeling is there and can't be done so easily. Then I stopped talking and deleted off his contacts. We are due to meet up next month together with my dad after ONE YEAR of waiting. And crap like this happened. Instead of staying at his aunt's house, I'm going to stay in a hotel with my dad. And we are supposed to spend our first Valentine's day together in Italy and I guess it's not happening right now. He offered to pay me back the air ticket money and asked if it's possible for us to travel together when I'm there. I said no; I don't want to see his face. Truth is, I can't stand traveling with him, and HIM not being my bf anymore. I even suggested to him that I would change my flight date to fly over to him earlier but he told me it wouldn't help him to make any decision. I'm still very much in love with him though he cheated on me but I don't hate him at all and don't plan to either; we even had plans to close the gap mid this year and get married eventually. So I guess this it it. My bf and I have been in a LDR for 2yrs+, although we have 8hours of time zone difference, we will text each other (Whatsapp) everyday, the moment he wakes up and gets ready for work (about 5pm my time) till my bed time (12am my time). We usually just Skype once a week (30-40mins) or just once every 2 weeks because we both prefer texting and sending each other pictures/videos/voice notes. Just recently the bf is suffering from tremendous stress at work (organization reform and his pay might get cut), taking an exam for his ACCA qualification (it's his 3rd attempt of re-sitting the same exam) and his grandpa has just passed away a few days ago. During his study period in preparation for the exam, we will text very little because he doesn't want to be distracted. But this time around, with so many things happening at the same time, he got very depressed, to the extent he doesn't bother to text me, reply my messages. In my messages, I kept trying to cheer him up, encourage him and constantly telling him that I'll be there for him and I'll love him no matter what. And he would thank me and tell me that he loves me too. I told him that the fact that he's read my msges and didn't bother to reply hurts me like hell. Because I was very worried about his mental health (his emotions) and if he's eating and sleeping alright. He kept apologizing to me, saying he's shutting down on everyone who cares about him because he's so sad that he doesn't want to talk to anyone. I asked him if just sending me one msg in the morning to assure me that he's okay is too much, he said it isn't at all. At last, I told him I will give him space so he will go do whatever he has to and come back to me once his exam's finished (Dec 10). I know I might sound silly but I haven't heard from him for 1.5 days now; I know he's been checking his msges on whatsapp (from his last seen online time) but he just didn't send me any texts. I'm visiting him with my dad next Feb and I really hope that he's gonna be fine and he will eventually come back and talk to me if I stop talking and pressing him to talk. Should I be worried at all?
justwhoiam Posted January 6, 2014 Posted January 6, 2014 I stopped talking and deleted off his contacts. ... we even had plans to close the gap mid this year and get married eventually. So I guess this it it. I am so sorry. And speechless.
Author LLQ1986 Posted January 6, 2014 Author Posted January 6, 2014 I am so sorry. And speechless. What a shame and what a waste. We were so in love. And he even made plans and bought gifts to surprise me just a few weeks ago.
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