simple_name Posted January 5, 2014 Posted January 5, 2014 I have a very close female friend, we lived in each others pockets for a year until we had a massive argument (never a bad word before). I called her out on some of her bad behaviour. I told her a bit too frankly that she is sometimes so focused on getting what or who she wants and absoloutely nothing will get in her way, unfortunately it came out far too harshly. After giving me the cold shoulder for a few weeks she came round to mine and asked me if I had feelings for her like it was a really gross idea. I replied I did, but never got the chance to explain that whilst I love her as a friend I wouldn’t want to be her boyfriend. Mainly due to her ‘grass is always greener’ issues and being overly flirty with most men and then wondering why ‘situations’ always occur. I admit I did have a bit of a crush on her at the time because she’s damn cool, I’d just never have done anything about it. Six months later I sent her a Christmas card which was basically a long letter that explained a lot of things and was an apology for how things came out, not what I actually said. I obviously told her that I miss her as a friend too. After about another six months we started hanging out most days/evenings we’re both off work, it was really cool to have my best mate back. Things were totally fine until a few months ago. We went out on a ‘non-date’ night out. It was a great night and we both had a really good time. Then we didn’t speak or see each other for a week, I got the impression she had been avoiding me. A few days later things seemed fine again. Over the last few months a new male friend of my friend has popped up. He’s a nice bloke and a good laugh but before Christmas I felt like a gooseberry a couple of times when around them, her flirting has been off the chart when we’re all together. I really don’t know if she knows she’s doing it or not, she does it a lot. Just before Christmas she got a txt from him after they’d hung out the previous day (I was not invited) saying ‘I miss you’ and that ‘its a problem’. She didn’t reply to it. Several time she has told me she’s absolutely not interested in him ‘in that way’ both before and after receiving the txt. She’s told me she has dropped big hints that she’s not interested but not had a proper conversation with him about it. I said I think a proper conversation may be required if hints don't work. Fast forward to Christmas Eve, Her new friend spent all of Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day at her place just getting stoned instead of seeing his family, he only stayed on the sofa though. The poor bloke is obviously nuts about my friend but she is choosing to ignore it. When I got back from seeing family over Christmas she invited me over and whilst sharing a spliff she told me how much she appreciated the card I sent last year and that she was sorry. My friend is incredibly stubborn, never thought I'd get an apology! Like an idiot I fumbled a pathetic rambling reply. She also told me she was horny, I didn’t really reply, it’s not the first time in the last few months she’s said it. Each time not sure if it’s a test, statement of fact or a come-on. Fairly often she jokes about her ‘v’ having cobwebs when we’re all hanging out and when its just the two of us. Pretty sure each time hasn’t been a come-on because I’ve she’s always made it clear that I’m not her type and I don’t get any complements from her about my looks (many other complements sure, I give the same kind back because we get along like a house on fire most of the time). On New Years Eve we all hung out together again, it was cool for a while but then the flirting with our other friend started again and it just felt super awkward. Again she told me she quietly that she was feeling horny, then while playing with Scrabble fridge magnets she spelled out ‘horny’ when just the two of us were looking. We both left at about 2am, I then rocked off meet up with a small group of my friends at a mates place and stayed up partying well into the afternoon Now my close friend is on holiday for three weeks and I’m glad to be honest. Not sure what to do when my friend gets back, I don’t like seeing people strung on in front of me wether she realises she’s doing it or not. WOW that was a much longer ramble than intended! Any thoughts or advice?
Frank2thepoint Posted January 5, 2014 Posted January 5, 2014 I think your female friend wants to have sex with you. Maybe become friends with benefits.
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