meadow19 Posted January 5, 2014 Posted January 5, 2014 My boyfriend and I are both 20. We were both each others first for just about everything, first relationship, lost virginity to one another etc. My boyfriend of a year and a half broke up with me. We broke up because all we did for 2 months straight was argue about anything and everything. We really began to resent each other. Other then the arguing, we both agreed we had a great relationship. We had great trust, we both were close with each others families, it was just over all a good relationship. I gave him some space, but we agreed to spend our monthly anniversary with each other to say "goodbye" we had a great time and at the end we both started crying said we should of just taken space but we ended things, etc. We went out on anniversary dates for the next two months, every time was a great time. However, throughout all of this he blocked me on social networks and i knew he was trying to talk to other girls. Finally, it got to a point where I was trying to make things work for real and he wasnt, he wasnt fully committed into trying and it showed. I called him out on it and he said he was trying to try but didnt actually want to try, he said he didnt care, it wasnt there, chances of us ever getting back together ever were improbable. Then the next day we spoke and he apologized, he said he went the wrong way about it, that he was being mean because he wanted me to stop trying and give up. He told me he still loved me and cared and he still had a thing for me and liked me but he didnt want a girlfriend anymore. and At first he was telling me he hooked up with someone else and he felt so guilty and thought of me, and then a few weeks later he said he meant that then, but not anymore because he thought we were going to get back together, but then he got used to being single and he wants both of us to see other people. During the few months of us dating and then not speaking for weeks and then dating again, he would try to look through my phone when I'd walk out of the room and I've walked in multiple times on him trying to go through my phone, he'd see a box of our things and go through his old letters and read them. Even the last days of us taking, he would ask questions about who I'm doing things with and if its with another guy. Confusing behavior to me. Stupidly, we decided to spend one last day together. We started it off by arguing and crying, then once we talked things out, the rest of the day was fine.. kind of. He was so cuddly and hand holding and kissing me, he was very sweet and affectionate. Then of course my emotions got the best of me and I started crying about how I didnt want this at all, he was the only one who wanted it. He told me to give him his space, he doesnt know about the future, he's not a fortune teller, he said he still cared and liked me, but not enough.. it said it was different and it wasnt enough to be with me anymore or want to commit to me. We went on with the rest of the date and it was a lot of fun. He drove me home after the date and as I was walking inside he opened the car window and screamed he loved me and smiled, I returned it and that was the last time we spoke. He deleted all our pictures on social networks after that night, he blocked all my friends from seeing his stuff - I guess so i cant see it. I just dont understand his reasoning exactly. I asked if there was another girl and he said he was talking to other girls, but not one girl in particular had his attention. I asked if he fell out of love and he told me he still loved me. I asked for a reason and he didnt have one, all he kept saying was that it wasnt enough anymore. He said he doesn't know if its over forever, but he's sure it's over right now. He said he hoped somewhere down the line we could do it all over again, just better the second time around... but he doesnt know if that will ever happen. He said it wasn't me at all, I was a great girlfriend, Our relationship wasn't that bad either, but he just didnt want to stay anymore. I don't understand how he could take me out on all these dates and do all this stuff and then just be done. Is it that he's just young and I was his first so he wants to experience life and other girls? Is he just sugar coating something and I dont see it? I've been digging into my brain like crazy trying to understand, have some sort of explanation to why. I told him to tell me he fell out of love, he met someone else, anything for me to understand and he wouldnt say either. Some type of explanation? Does anyone think he's going to miss me and come back? Something like the grass isnt greener on the other side? Anyone have any thoughts or experiences similar?
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted January 5, 2014 Posted January 5, 2014 U two are probably always going to have a thing if u were each others first, however u are both young and both of u should experience the world. If u were to settle down now it would more than likely fall apart... it sounds like he wants to experience other things before settling down which I know is very hard on u but u do only live once. Use this as an opportunity for u to experience things and see what happens in the future... u have to walk away now... x x
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