VenusJ4F Posted January 8, 2005 Posted January 8, 2005 My husband and I have been married for three and a half years, He has a six year old daughter form a previous marrage. Lately things between us have not been great. On my birthday he told me he wanted a divorce, we have talked about and decided to try to work things out. But now he has taken his daughter for the past 8 weekends, and when she is here he does not pay an attention to me. I know this is a soar subject for him and I was woundering if anyone has some advise on how to address this with him. I am so scared that if I say anything it is going to push him over the edge and He will leave. Please help I love him so much and I want to make this work.
uriel Posted January 8, 2005 Posted January 8, 2005 My guess is that he's using his daughter's visits on purpose as a way to avoid intimacy / spending time with you. He could pay attention to you when she's there and you could all three do things together (emotionally) as a family. So, she's an excuse for him to avoid you. I wouldn't confront him about his daughter's visits. I'd try to talk with him about the larger issues in the marriage. Why would he want to keep you at a distance? What can you do as a couple to close that distance? Don't focus on the symptoms -- get to the underlying causes. -- uriel
Author VenusJ4F Posted January 8, 2005 Author Posted January 8, 2005 Thanks for the advise, that sounds good. I will try to talk to him today and we will see how things go.
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