I think she is cheating and/or lying. Shes begging me to take her back?

[AntiSocal]

Been seeing each other since september known her since middle school

 

A couple weeks before christmas she started acting kinda distant. Said nothing was wrong so i ignore it.

 

Then she starts going christmas shopping EVERYDAY. Anytime i ask her to go out shes too busy christmas shopping. And she always claims they didn't have what she was looking for so she has to go out again. This continued up until christmas. Asked my friends and they said maybe she was just shopping, if it kept happening after christmas i should dump her.

 

Then after christmas she saw me once. Haven't seen her since. And didn't see her for almost a week before that. She always claims she is with her family. 24/7 for the past two weeks shes been with her family for the holidays. Or thats what she says.

 

On new years eve i broke up with her. After She texted me this "i was gonna ask you if you want to hangout, but since you aren't texting me back i'm just gonna spend the night at my sisters house." and then she went on to ignore me for the rest of the night.

 

When she contacted me again the next day i told her it was best if we just broke it off because she didn't seem into it. She gets really upset and tells me that she was with her family. And it wasn't up to her. And blah blah blah. She did send me some pictures of her with her family. But IMO thats not really proof of anything. She could have taken those pictures any day of the two weeks that i haven't seen her.

 

She keeps texting me telling me i'm being stupid. Its a dumb reason to dump her and she really loves me and would never lie. Shes called me crying multiple times and keeps saying that i'm just being paranoid and that shes sorry and would never lie.

 

On the one hand i feel bad and i want to take her back because she seems genuinely upset. But then on the other hand i feel like its just an act or something to get me to stay with her while she cheats on me. Any idea what i should do?

[blackpajamas]

How much do you know about her family/family activities? Some people do have very long and drawn out holiday functions, especially if people are coming in and out of state to get together.

 

Is there any real evidence that she's cheated other than she couldn't hang out for two weeks and was Christmas shopping a lot?

[twinkie0]

It all comes down to how well you know her. She seems genuinely upset, so I say give her a chance. But make it very clear about what she did to bother you.

 

Also, consider you might in fact have been a little paranoid. Maybe she really did want to spend time with her family, so let her. Don't expect her to be around you 24/7, girls need their space. Good luck

[salparadise]

It's your life and your relationship, but I think (based on what little I know) it's not likely that she was cheating...

 

still, if it were me I'd be pissed about not being considered even a moderate priority during the holidays. I'd tell her that you intend to find someone who places time together as high on the list as shopping, family, office parties or whatever... because your needs are important, and you aren't in this thing just to sit on the sidelines for the whole friggin month of December.

Edited January 3, 2014 by salparadise