mantlefan Posted January 5, 2014 Posted January 5, 2014 I've never really got on with Facebook myself. It was actually her that encouraged me to ever use it. But yeah it is utter BS. I don't understand the need to flaunt so openly to everyone either. It's like are they convincing everyone else they are moving on or themselves? I know what you mean. I post more mundane statuses now that I am 5 months out of a 5 year RS. Stuff like "home for Christmas." It's not really me, and I know it's pathetic, but sometimes it's just nice to see the "likes" and know someone cares a little bit.
Author FortunateSon Posted January 5, 2014 Author Posted January 5, 2014 FS...I can almost feel how much this must have stung...vicariously. I have avoided FB like the plague since my split because I'm scared *****less of having to face what you've just faced. Remember though...keep the truth up front. Social media is nothing more than self-marketing. People put up the glossy, sugary pics, make a few of the right noises in the comments and status boxes, pick up a few "likes" to boot...and bam...the brains of the "followers" and "friends" do the rest, filling in the blanks and reaching the conclusion that this person sure as hell got themselves one hell of a life...sheesh...lucky them. Remember. It's. Just. Self. Marketing. Believe me, if I gave a flying f!ck about FB right now (and I don't because I've developed a serious aversion to it since the BU) you'd think my Christmas was an M & S TV commercial. You'd see my laughing and frolicking with my family, playing with my son, smiling, partying...and thanking the world for the wonder that is "my life." What you'd miss out on would be the gut wrenching anxiety I felt just before that photo with my Dad and brother was snapped on the stroke of new year (because I missed my ex more in that last ten seconds of 2013 than I have done all year), the depressed nights I spent just longing to hold her or chat to her, and the fear and anxiety I felt about whether my life is ever gonna feel as cosy as it felt with her in it. So...you'd have got a FB page of "life" minus the pain, sadness, fear and anxiety...and with the sugary ***** turned up threefold...BS in other words. Don't worry too much about social media...it's our attempt to convince ourselves life's not as petrifying and empty as we know it is deep down inside... Keep that truth up front buddy. Brilliant advice Sambo, I great appreciate yours and everyone else's reply. I had a conversation with my friend about this tonight and we came to the same conclusion: people really attempt to glorify their lives on FB, trying to portray something they are not. I've noticed the happiest people I know rarely post on Facebook if they are on there at all, while the most unhappy, emotionally needy tend to post the most. My ex was this person who posted constantly for the attention and perceived emotional support. 1
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