Crazy Crab Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 Here's what I plan on sending "I have no interest in getting back with you, but I would like to know the truth. you said you didn't leave me for someone else, but I know too much that you're with this new person. I care for you, and want nothing more than happiness for you, but please don't leave me with questions unanswered. I want to be at peace with this."
Simon Phoenix Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 http://yelperswhosuck.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/12.gif Closure comes from within, not from another person. She's not going to answer the questions in a way that will satisfy you. Either she'll avoid them or give you answers so vague that it causes you to ask more questions that she has no interest in answering. This would be a bad thing for you to send, as would anything. 5
Haydn Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 No No No No. Nem nem.(Sorry i switched to Hungarian) Bad idea. (Rossz!) 2
Author Crazy Crab Posted January 1, 2014 Author Posted January 1, 2014 does it seem like I'm psycho? I'm driving myself insane with overthinking, all I want is for her to say, "yes I left you for him." then I'll be at ease.
pickflicker Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 I am deliberately posting my reply before reading your post, because I want to say - never, ever, ever, send a letter to your ex. Ever. Now I'll go and read it... 1
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 does it seem like I'm psycho? I'm driving myself insane with overthinking, all I want is for her to say, "yes I left you for him." then I'll be at ease. Yes.....it makes you look pretty bad. You may THINK you will be at ease, but you wont be I assure you.
pickflicker Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 No No No No. Nem nem.(Sorry i switched to Hungarian) Bad idea. (Rossz!) Nyet, nada, nein... 1
lollipopspot Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 does it seem like I'm psycho? I'm driving myself insane with overthinking, all I want is for her to say, "yes I left you for him." then I'll be at ease. What about that would that put you at ease? 1
Author Crazy Crab Posted January 1, 2014 Author Posted January 1, 2014 What about that would that put you at ease? I want kill hope of ever getting back with her...
pickflicker Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 OP, it doesn't matter why she left you, only that she left you. Whatever the reason, none of it is going to make you feel better. 2
Haydn Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 You are dead to her. harsh but the reality. She has another life now and really owes you no explanation. Dont go looking for more pain because that what you will find if you ask her and she replies. `Yes i left you for a another guy who was better that you`. Would you have another question or would you find peace with that answer? I want kill hope of ever getting back with her... 3
StyleOnEm Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 DO it if you want to feel even more miserable. That I promise will happen. 2
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 I want kill hope of ever getting back with her... Its already killed. Anything done after makes you look weak and envious.
Author Crazy Crab Posted January 1, 2014 Author Posted January 1, 2014 Can you guys give me advice on how to find closure within? It would be nice to find a new girl, but holding on to my ex is making it impossible.
pickflicker Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 Can you guys give me advice on how to find closure within? It would be nice to find a new girl, but holding on to my ex is making it impossible. Why would speaking to her suddenly change you from holding on, to letting go?
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 Can you guys give me advice on how to find closure within? It would be nice to find a new girl, but holding on to my ex is making it impossible. When it comes to moving forward, it's, sadly, not easy nor usually quick. Closure comes from within. When you accept it fully, it gets easier. You may or may not be there, but when you realize your only option is to keep moving forward, it gets easier. It always does......but it takes time. Sometimes a short time, sometimes longer. Everyone heals differently. Time heals all wounds man. One thing I can tell you is rushing to other relationships before repairing yourself will just hurt worse. The phrase "You have to love yourself before you can love anyone else" is a great phase, especially now for you. Being comfortable with yourself and being okay with not having a significant other is key. Once that happens, you will be good. Again, it just takes time. Enjoy the New Year. This is YOUR year
Author Crazy Crab Posted January 1, 2014 Author Posted January 1, 2014 When it comes to moving forward, it's, sadly, not easy nor usually quick. Closure comes from within. When you accept it fully, it gets easier. You may or may not be there, but when you realize your only option is to keep moving forward, it gets easier. It always does......but it takes time. Sometimes a short time, sometimes longer. Everyone heals differently. Time heals all wounds man. One thing I can tell you is rushing to other relationships before repairing yourself will just hurt worse. The phrase "You have to love yourself before you can love anyone else" is a great phase, especially now for you. Being comfortable with yourself and being okay with not having a significant other is key. Once that happens, you will be good. Again, it just takes time. Enjoy the New Year. This is YOUR year Wish I could tell my ex that, leaving me for this other guy while still hurting from our relationship. seems like she's dependent on men, when she says not
Haydn Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 She is with someone else, she is not hurting. Just you because you think she is hurting. You are scared to face up to the truth that she has moved on. The quicker you do this then the quicker you will be ok. No closure. You dont need it. Wish I could tell my ex that, leaving me for this other guy while still hurting from our relationship. seems like she's dependent on men, when she says not 1
Author Crazy Crab Posted January 2, 2014 Author Posted January 2, 2014 She is with someone else, she is not hurting. Just you because you think she is hurting. You are scared to face up to the truth that she has moved on. The quicker you do this then the quicker you will be ok. No closure. You dont need it. last time we spoke, she told me she's in pain still, depressed and all that.
Kilty Posted January 2, 2014 Posted January 2, 2014 Sending this letter will be the worst thing that you ever do on so many levels. Trust me. For starters she could show it to the new guy and even worse show it to someone else as evidence of harrassment. Letters proclaiming your undying love and apologising are bad enough but this type of letter is the worst As stated she is most likely not going to reply and if she does it wont be anything you want to hear. Sending it makes you lose your self respect and appear desperate and there is nothing more off putting in a woman's eyes than that. Sending the letter will not achieve closure for you - the only way you get that is not contacting her ever again. Also man up - would you really want her back now that she has been with someone else ? Deep down you know the answer
Mondmellonw Posted January 2, 2014 Posted January 2, 2014 Give me a little hope on myself, and STOP. Don't ask her. She left you.
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