udelgirl Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 hi! i'm a college student and i've been dating this really conservative & sensitive guy. he's treated me out to dinner several times even though his budget seems very tight. (there's already been some uncomfortableness with how i'm sort of better off financially and how he isn't that much, frankly). now i want to treat him out somehow without seeming too much like a money spender. there's the idea of cooking him dinner (which i would LOVE to do) but my dad is uncomfortable w/ our relationship moving so fast. and we won't be seeing each other for a while (going off to our separate colleges) so i want to make it special, but he shares a car and asked very politely if i could pick him up so we can hang out together tomorrow afternoon. i can't really pick him up and then drop him off at his own house and expect anything romantic to happen, but that's another issue i have... so when evening rolls around, what to do for dinner? i don't want to create a situation where his manliness is silenced (by me paying for dinner etc)... mainly because he's already not very confident (i think he has the impression i just want to be friends or something? he seems insecure, even though i tell him i truly enjoy spending time with him). is there a way to create another good opportunity for him to feel secure and confident so he can make a move (he's very traditional and conservative, and i think he'd ultimately prefer to make the move- he's already shown much satisfaction with treating me and doing other 'manly' things...) what do you think?
iceisles Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 If you are really concerned about paying for dinner, then I definitely would cook. Why does your Dad think that is moving too fast? I don't see any big deal with cooking for someone - in fact, I think it's a great gesture if you know how to do it. Because you have to eat, cooking or going out to eat are your only two options. Of course, you could do something romantic, like pack a romantic dinner (something simple, like chicken or sandwiches) to take down by the lake or somewhere secluded where you two could be together. The main priority will just be to make him focus on you, not how much money you're spending - if that does indeed make him uncomfortable. Some of the best things in life, like going for a long walk hand-in-hand and talking, are absolutely free. Definitely think of things like that. Even little ideas can mean a lot to someone who really cares about you. Good luck.
alphamale Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 Originally posted by udelgirl is there a way to create another good opportunity for him to feel secure and confident so he can make a move (he's very traditional and conservative, and i think he'd ultimately prefer to make the move- he's already shown much satisfaction with treating me and doing other 'manly' things...) what do you think? ummm...hows about "I would really like you to kiss me..." making him dinner is a good idea but this is not time to experiment. make a dish you are good at and one you know he will like. maybe like pot roast and mashed potatoes with mac & cheese. mmmmmm...
Cecelius Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 Say the following as you are walking somewhere with him: What you like about him is that he is so confident and manly, but reserved and controlled, which is so rare these days. And you especially like that he knows exactly when to make his move... If he doesn't get the hint, help him out and dump him -- in puzzling over it, he'll figure out what happens to men who move too slow.
alphamale Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 Originally posted by Cecelius If he doesn't get the hint, help him out and dump him -- in puzzling over it, he'll figure out what happens to men who move too slow. well, this may be a bit hasty but when a dude is a bit slow or dense the gurl needs to be a bit more assertive, esp if she likes him a lot. otherwise nuthin' will happen.
Bronzepen Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 Originally posted by Cecelius If he doesn't get the hint, help him out and dump him -- in puzzling over it, he'll figure out what happens to men who move too slow. He who hesitates, masterbates. Just forget the whole dinner thing. Do things that don't require money. Like going for walks, hike, etc... Some museums are free.
Author udelgirl Posted January 7, 2005 Author Posted January 7, 2005 thank you everyone for all your great ideas! my dad is STRONGLY against having him over for dinner (i tried persuading him again- although he likes this guy, he still thinks it's going too fast), so i guess i will just have to take him out someplace casual for dinner tonight (since eating eventually is going to be inevitable).. i might make up some excuse for not eating at my place, like 'my mom is having her friends for dinner' or something.. anyone else have a better idea? thanks again
alphamale Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 Originally posted by udelgirl .. i might make up some excuse for not eating at my place, like 'my mom is having her friends for dinner' or something.. anyone else have a better idea? thanks again yes i have better idea: 1) go thru taco bell drive thru and pick up a coupla combos, don't forget hot sauce 2) rent a room at some cheap no-tell motel 3) rip his clothes off and have wild sex, don't forget protection 4) eat the food you procured in step 1
iceisles Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale yes i have better idea: 1) go thru taco bell drive thru and pick up a coupla combos, don't forget hot sauce 2) rent a room at some cheap no-tell motel 3) rip his clothes off and have wild sex, don't forget protection 4) eat the food you procured in step 1 He's conservative. Better go with Wendy's and a makeout session in the parking lot.
alphamale Posted January 7, 2005 Posted January 7, 2005 Originally posted by iceisles He's conservative. Better go with Wendy's and a makeout session in the parking lot. Yes WENDYS would be good too. I just heard an ad on radio yesterday that said if you buy and combo you can substitue a side salad or chili or some other item for the fries for no extra charge. That is totall cool. I'll hav e to start going more often cause their chili is pretty good.
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