HeartinPain Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 With ex for nearly 15 years and he left me for his coworker which he denies. They had went out behind my back saying that it was platonic when we had an argument and didn't speak for 4 days. After his 'date' he started to distance himself from me and eventually broke up with me saying he didn't want to try anymore and he wanted to be alone to concentrate on his career. He got with the coworker a week later who had a 2 year recently long distance boyfriend. Begged, cried and pleaded to work things out and he refused saying he had feelings for her. The coworker broke up with her bf to be with him. I went 30 days NC and broke down and called him. He said he did miss me and wanted to reconcile, but I had to be patient because of the sensitive work situation. He said she was young and didn't have a connection with her. For 1 month he strung me along while he continued to be with the coworker.. arguing it was a "process'. He would call me nearly everyday and we would go out to eat on a few occasions behind her back. He would hug and kiss me, but say he was 'confused."He would tell me he still loved me and wanted to be with me. I got tired of waiting and being hurt every day and started pressuring him to break up with her. All he was doing was saying words I wanted to hear with NO action. We got into an argument over it and he said he would call me later. It has been over 40 days of NC since then. He started slowly turning into a person I don't even recognize. Suddenly, he is becoming a Christian because his mom and new gf is. He was never religious before. He goes to all her events and hangs out with her friends when he never wanted to go to any of my events. I have finally accepted the break up and that he is no longer the person I fell for. His actions post-BU really damaged any chance for a friendship later in life. I mostly get waves of anger now, but maybe its because of the holidays that have really got me feeling sad. I do not know if this is considered a rebound since he did have her lined up before he broke up with me... It hurts me to see that through his actions he disrespected our relationship and probably did not even love me the way I loved him.. It hurts really bad. Link to post Share on other sites
LostConfused123 Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 I really don't have any advice to give but I am so sorry you're hurting so badly. 15 years is a long time. I hope you don't find this offensive but he sounds like a total weasel!!! Best of luck to you!! Keep posting here when you feel down. Lots of really great people here to help. ((hugs!!)) 2 Link to post Share on other sites
iouaname Posted January 1, 2014 Share Posted January 1, 2014 4.5 months is simply just not enough time for you to get over a 15 year relationship, and that's okay. I'm sorry for what you went through, but you're doing the right thing by accepting that he is no longer the person that you knew and that it's time for you to move forward with your life without him. Stay strong - you'll make it through this a much stronger person! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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