Hoosfoos Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 I got it on Christmas day. She dumped me 6 weeks ago and she texted me 6 days post breakup to tell me about her upcoming convocation for which I offered her congratulations, just to take the high road. Anyway, I had no intention of texting her on Christmas day, as I am so hurt, but woke up to find that she texted me at 930AM. It went something like this: "Merry Christmas Axxx, I hope you are having a good time visiting your family up in Cxxxx. Happy New Year too! Thank you for sending me that letter. It was very thoughtful and sincere (I had mailed some of her stuff back and enclosed a letter in which I expressed regret how I made her feel at times when we were together, thanking her for what she brought into my life, and that I was in the process of detaching from her). I want you to know that I have nothing but good thoughts about you. You are truly the sweetest man I know. All the best! Love, Sxxxx" I responded an hour later: "Merry Christmas to you too. Thanks for your generous thoughts and sentiments. Have a great 2014." I know that these are breadcrumbs. I know that it is an attempt by her to make me feel better about things but it didn't. And I know I had the option not to reply. I am hoping my bland response was a polite way of making her go away. To be honest, despite some fantastic times and chemistry, when we were together she was often quite controlling, critical, bossy, and complaining and unappreciative, despite the fact that I treated her like a queen. We grew apart - I didn't feel like she was in my corner, and she didn't feel I was challenging enough for her, and did not want to wait around for another stint of school I am about to put myself through - she finished her master's degree and has found secure, well paying employment. I have not. Our conflict was escalating, and despite my wishes to take the relationship to therapy, she didn't go for it. We had been together almost 2 years and had spoken of marriage previously. I am pissed that she didn't have those unconditional "good thoughts" when the relationship still had a chance. And I resent the fact that she considers me the "world's sweetest man" yet dumped me. Friendzone city. The dagger in the heart was to sign the text with "love." The way I see it, if she truly loved me, we'd still be together. Let me know what you have to say about any of this.
notthathard Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 she was often quite controlling, critical, bossy, and complaining and unappreciative, despite the fact that I treated her like a queen. and she didn't feel I was challenging enough for her And I resent the fact that she considers me the "world's sweetest man" yet dumped me. Friendzone city. Nothing in that message. But have a look at the above at what you wrote, this is not what she was looking for in a man.
StyleOnEm Posted December 31, 2013 Posted December 31, 2013 You seem to have a good grasp of what's going on, and you made the right reply. I'm sure you'll do better with the next girl.
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