Difference between asking someone out vs. a date

[DarkNoel]

I've been wondering about this question for a while.

 

What exactly does it mean to ask someone out? Is it the same as going on a date or not?

 

What are the differences between the following questions if they were asked to you?

- Would you like to grab some drinks/lunch/dinner sometime?

- Want to get some coffee with me?

- Would you like to go out to lunch/dinner sometime?

- Would you like to go out on a date?

[Mariposa10]

If one gets together with a new guy to grab some coffee. It's not a date, is it?

[d0nnivain]

A date is a single one time event. You will get together at a specified time & place for a definite activity.

 

 

"Going out" meant you were in a relationship . .. multiple & varied meetings with no specified end.

 

 

The only differences in the 4 scenarios you mentioned were the nature of the activities.

[FitChick]

If the person doing the asking is romantically interested, it's a date.

[Pretty.in.Pink]

Both can be used to ask for a date. But I also go out or hang out with my buddies and friends. I only agree to a date if I (might be) romantically interested in a guy. Currently, the only person I'm dating is my boyfriend.

 

I've been wondering about this question for a while.

 

What exactly does it mean to ask someone out? Is it the same as going on a date or not?

What are the differences between the following questions if they were asked to you?

- Would you like to grab some drinks/lunch/dinner sometime?

- Want to get some coffee with me?

- Would you like to go out to lunch/dinner sometime?

Context becomes very important with these three requests because those are the same questions you would ask of a new buddy you met in your sports league, the locker room, work, or wherever.

 

Have you been flirting? Did the request include an offer to pick the person up at home? What exactly are you doing to make it clear that you are looking for a date rather than to build a platonic friendship or hang out with a new buddy?

 

- Would you like to go out on a date?

Now, this leaves zero doubt in anyone's mind about your request. If the person goes out with you, it's obviously intended as a date!

 

Clear communication limits the time you waste going down rabbit holes and sitting at dead ends waiting and hoping for things to pan out and develop romantically. Yes means yes to dating. No means, no I don't see you in a romantic way. Yes, it sucks if the answer is no, but not as much as wasting six months trying to figure out where you stand when the answer is nowhere. Who knows what yes means to the other three questions unless there are other very clear signals that you both see the request as a date? With the fourth question, you know when it's a dead end. You can pick yourself up and move on to more promising options much more quickly.

Edited December 30, 2013 by Pretty.in.Pink

[MalachiX]

Honestly, there's often a gray area to "is it a date?"

 

Especially early on, you're sometimes feeling your way through things and trying to protect yourself (on both sides). Often you'll do something kinda casual on a first date that doesn't have to be excessively romantic.

 

There's nothing wrong with starting slow and seeing if you two have chemistry. You may know someone from work or mutual friends and have hung out in that environment but you don't know how you guys would be in a more intimate setting.

 

Sometimes having a casual "date" lets you just feel each other out (no pun intended). If you're sensing some chemistry, you go out again and the second time tends to be more clear. If you're not feeling chemistry, you're just two people/friends getting to know each other. No one has to feel rejected.