pickflicker Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 For the most part, this has at least stopped me from feeling heartbroken for a second and just can laugh again because this is creepy, but funny. Stop talking to him. I mean, I would string him asking for my own amusement (player gets played), bit you're too emotionally fragile for that game. 1
Volthi10 Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 He just said he put my picture as his screen saver...on his phone. Oh dear god. He sounds like he is taking advantage of your vulnerability. :/
Author BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 Stop talking to him. I mean, I would string him asking for my own amusement (player gets played), bit you're too emotionally fragile for that game. haha like what do you mean?
mercuryshadow Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 That's a good attitude to take. i.e. A guy wants you. Really, really wants you. So much so that he has succumb to behaving like a total weirdo. Take this one for the road, and continue on. Indeed, it shall serve as a boost to your morale, as well as a funny story to share in the future.
radiodarcy Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 I actually already had this conversation with him on Saturday night. He was talking about sex and I said please stop I'm not ready for that and if that is all you are looking for then to go somewhere else. He was nice about it and said he would stop till today he said, "I'll kiss you so soft and feel your body start to heat up. your legs will shake as we kiss harder. hands exploring every inch. 2 hours will seem like 10 minutes. and we lay there looking deep into each others eyes.and then you will know if I am the one or not..." The fact that a.) he is bringing up sex this early and b.) is not stopping even after you have asked you to stop completely undercuts the things he was telling you about wanting to take things slow and respecting you. Clearly he doesn't respect you at all; as he isn't respecting your boundaries. I hate for you to have to change your number again but you may had to if this creep doesn't stop. Either that or just don't respond to his texts or phone calls. And this pretty much answers the question of being friends with him. None of that - - he'll just see it as an opportunity to continue to pressure you for sex. Just from reading the stuff he's been telling you this guy gives me the heebie jeebies 1
pickflicker Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 He sounds like he is taking advantage of your vulnerability. :/ I had this similar situation. Got contacted online, dude comes on way too strong, brags about sexual prowess etc, ask before I'd even met him. By the time we got around to organising a first date, I was just going because I didn't want to be judgemental, and one date is harmless. He stood me up! Later that night, he calls, begging me for another chance. "Can we please do lunch?" I agreed, but told him to can the sex talk because he was on the fast track to none at all. The next morning, he sends me a shirtless pic. A few hours later, he texts me "Hey, I'm here at the pub, where are you?" You see, the shirtless pic was the last straw, so I stood him up. I texted back "You are never, ever getting into these pants." He called and left a voicemail screaming at me and calling me a tease. That, it's how you handle these guys. 2
pickflicker Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 The fact that a.) he is bringing up sex this early and b.) is not stopping even after you have asked you to stop completely undercuts the things he was telling you about wanting to take things slow and respecting you. Clearly he doesn't respect you at all; as he isn't respecting your boundaries. I hate for you to have to change your number again but you may had to if this creep doesn't stop. Either that or just don't respond to his texts or phone calls. And this pretty much answers the question of being friends with him. None of that - - he'll just see it as an opportunity to continue to pressure you for sex. Just from reading the stuff he's been telling you this guy gives me the heebie jeebies She doesn't need to change her number. He'll burn himself out after a week and move onto the next potential. They have no stamina to persist once it's been made clear they aren't getting any. All she has to do is ignore him.
pickflicker Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 haha like what do you mean? Sorry, I quoted the wrong post in my example - BYCS, read my story and see if it helps you...
KatZee Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 Also, he is texting me now saying, "I'll say this. I've always taken risks. And have always been lead to win. I'm taking a risk with you. Risk it. Let me prove your wrong. You have my word you will be very excited if you do. Very excited after you do. Sex will bring me so close to you. You have no idea. You think I'm sweet now? lol. Just you wait. Take the risk and get the reward." He also said, "Sex with me would bring me more emotionally connected" And then he says, "I want you to promise me something" and I say, "what" and he says, "that when you get scared of me leaving you that you tell me right then" :sick::sick::sick::sick: Are you KIDDING me? I hope you deleted this tool bag's number and never respond to him again. He sounds like a disgusting pervert! Who says these things to a person they're just starting to get to know?! The guy I'm dating? We talked for a month, we've been dating for another month after that. So, TWO months. He would NEVER have the balls to be so utterly disgusting, forward, tacky and tasteless. Any sane guy knows that if you say this to a woman she's going to get real big eyes and run 10 miles in the opposite direction. I can't, for the life of me, comprehend how this guy feels lines like these work on a woman. He's a player. Hands down. No doubt about it. It's why he's such a slick sweet talker, and it's why he has condoms from one night stands. He knows what to do, what to say, to get EXACTLY what he wants from women and then throws 'em out just as fast as he throws out those wrappers. And don't for one second believe that ONS was from two weeks ago. Maybe two DAYS ago. And don't let him pull the guilt trip or make you feel sorry for him either with the, "ohhh now I ruined things right? :(" PLEASE. This guy is so damn transparent it's actually laughable. Stay away from him. He has "DANGER" written right on his forehead. 3
radiodarcy Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 She doesn't need to change her number. He'll burn himself out after a week and move onto the next potential. They have no stamina to persist once it's been made clear they aren't getting any. All she has to do is ignore him. ahh true - - as he came on this strong this fast, he'll burn out soon enough 1
KatZee Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 Now he says, "I'll say this. Don't let one ******* actions restrict your possible future. I'm not him. I'm not an ass hole. I don't cheat. I love hard. I will tell you so much you get sick of it. I will be your rock. Your kind. And will give you a great life. You just have to take that risk. That step that scares you. It scares me too. But for me, you are worth it" This is something you say to someone after you've been dating for a long time. How does he even know he loves you, how does he even know you're worth it??? HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOU. He's a CREEP. That's what he is. He's so beyond mental and he actually is starting to act and sound like this guy who stalked me for a little bit. Stop responding to him and tell him to lose your number. Get away from this guy, ASAP. 1
Author BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 I had this similar situation. Got contacted online, dude comes on way too strong, brags about sexual prowess etc, ask before I'd even met him. By the time we got around to organising a first date, I was just going because I didn't want to be judgemental, and one date is harmless. He stood me up! Later that night, he calls, begging me for another chance. "Can we please do lunch?" I agreed, but told him to can the sex talk because he was on the fast track to none at all. The next morning, he sends me a shirtless pic. A few hours later, he texts me "Hey, I'm here at the pub, where are you?" You see, the shirtless pic was the last straw, so I stood him up. I texted back "You are never, ever getting into these pants." He called and left a voicemail screaming at me and calling me a tease. That, it's how you handle these guys. WOW! Stood you up? I wouldn't have even ever talked to him again after that. Yea, this guy sent me a shirtless picture also, and let me just tell you, it wasn't very appealing, but I am trying not to be shallow. But this was AFTER our "lets pump the brakes and slow down" talk. So that was strike one. He is on strike three now. These kind of men don't get a hint. Sweet talk isn't going to make me drop my pants. I want more than that. I need time and if you can respect my time I acquire, then that shows me you really care. I love sex and I would be more than happy to have sex 20 times a day when I am READY with the right person. But I don't like to be pressured. I had an ex once who bought me flowers, woed my family and friends, was soooo romantic, bought me things, surprised me, the whole 9 yards...he ended up cheating on me with a married woman and he also forgot to mention he had a girlfriend of 4 years too. 1
Simon Phoenix Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 Yeah, stay single for a while. You are somehow attracting -- or attracted to in the case of your exes -- some sh*t-tier men. 2
legion113 Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 WOW! Stood you up? I wouldn't have even ever talked to him again after that. Yea, this guy sent me a shirtless picture also, and let me just tell you, it wasn't very appealing, but I am trying not to be shallow. But this was AFTER our "lets pump the brakes and slow down" talk. So that was strike one. He is on strike three now. These kind of men don't get a hint. Sweet talk isn't going to make me drop my pants. I want more than that. I need time and if you can respect my time I acquire, then that shows me you really care. I love sex and I would be more than happy to have sex 20 times a day when I am READY with the right person. But I don't like to be pressured. I had an ex once who bought me flowers, woed my family and friends, was soooo romantic, bought me things, surprised me, the whole 9 yards...he ended up cheating on me with a married woman and he also forgot to mention he had a girlfriend of 4 years too. Ummm, so are you guys saying I should change my avatar?
Author BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 Ummm, so are you guys saying I should change my avatar? UMMM, yes.
Haydn Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 Yes change it. Its a lovely pic but...... UMMM, yes.
Author BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 but it reeks of narcissism. (a man who fell in love with his own image reflected in a pool of water.) Yes change it. Its a lovely pic but......
Author BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 So he says, "I don't want to have sex with anyone else, but you. But only when you are ready" So I asked him, "why do you like me so much" and he said, "because you make me smile. you want the same as I do. you're kind and funny with a "don't ***** with me attitude" haha
legion113 Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 Lot's of people make me smile...should I screw them? :-) 2
Author BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 Lot's of people make me smile...should I screw them? :-) How old are you?
pickflicker Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 Well, there's my kid then:-) And adorable, too! BYCS, I probably wouldn't have followed through on lunch anyway, but saying 'yes' actually bought me time to think about it. Sweetie, this one needs to go on the scrap heap. Once you train your 'man picker', you can give these guys some rope and watch them swing, but in the meantime, you need to steer away from any guys who come on so hot they're like a blast furnace. They are never, ever sincere. Ok? If you stop answering his calls/texts, I promise you, within a week he will have disappeared. They don't stick around long if their lines aren't going to pay off. Just be the brick wall his texts bounce off and within a week, he will have forgotten all about you. 4
Author BlessYourCottonSocks Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 It was a joke. I'm actually being serious, how old are you?
williesd Posted December 30, 2013 Posted December 30, 2013 BlessYourCottonSocks. If i can offer having been out of a 3.5 year relationship since October, knowing it was final in November. What I read from the first few posting, your right in moving on. The man whom you've now met. Yes, as other's have said, slow down, be okay with being single. Easier said than done. I get anxiety at times like I'll never see my ex again, which I probably won't, but having that pop into my mind, can be dibilitating. I then get to thinking, if I did this or that, but I did this or that and never got anything in return. Then I got to realizing, I tolerated a lot of non-sense that no one should tolerate. It brought out the worst in me and the best at times. I've now been communicating with people. I waited until a few weeks ago, put up a profile on a dating website. It's still relatively early and I know I'm rebound guy at this moment and don't have any intentions of getting into anything serious. But I've also gotten involved with an organization for dogs, started to work out again, and have looked at different things with meetup groups to get involved with and to do things I put aside when I got lost in my last relationship. Why I say that, when I looked at my online profile earlier today, there was almost a half million people online at the time. You writing about your experience, makes me realize, there are dozens or hundred of us out there all experiencing the anxiety, hurt, confussion etc from a break up right now. They are there, you just don't see the labels on their foreheads, but we exist. Your in a decent spot, reaching out and writing and exposing yourself to feedback. Continue those steps, the pain from the last relationship will subside. If new guy can take a step back, still be there occassionally to do activities, not necessarily date, and is around in six months, "without" pressure, then consider something. You need to be firm with your boundaries right now and use the time to heal, pull yourself together and sit back and think, where do you want to go, what do you want in life. Pondering now isn't a bad thing and will benefit you over the long run.
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