Serenityjojo Posted December 29, 2013 Posted December 29, 2013 My gut tells me he just wants sex but am I just being paranoid? Guys, please share your perspective... I met this guy through an online dating site. He asked for my number and texted me a couple days later. He asked me if I was free the next day. I texted him back that I wasn't but I was free the following day. I did not hear from him for next three days. The dating site sent a note to the two of us asking if we met yet. That prompted me to text him saying I never heard back from him. He texted me later that evening saying he's been very busy and asking if I was free the next day. I was a bit annoyed with his late response and I had plans already so I didn't respond until 2 days later. I said I was free that night and he was free too so we made plans for dinner. I was feeling skeptical going into the date but I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. We finally met although he was about 15 minutes late to dinner. He didn't ask a lot of questions about me but I thought the conversation was good overall and he was cute. I can usually tell if a guy is interested but I couldn't really tell with him. He asked if I wanted to grab drinks after dinner. I said sure even though I had 2 glasses of wine at that point. We had a couple more drinks at the bar and he asked if I wanted to go to another bar near my place. It was still early and I was buzzed but not drunk so I agreed. We went to a couple more bars, had a few more drinks and had a major makeout session. We were both pretty drunk at this point and he said he has never been with someone my size (I'm quite petite). He asked if I wanted to go back to my place but I said I was going to call it a night. He walked me back to my place and texted me that night with "till next time Jo". I texted him the next day and said it was nice meeting him and I had a fun time. No word from him. I texted him a few days later on Xmas day to wish him merry Xmas. He texted back wishing me the same. He texted me a couple days later asking what I was doing this weekend and that we should go out for drinks. I texted back that I was out of town (I'm in la) and haven't heard back so far... If we have a second date...is it pretty obvious that he's just looking for sex?
python23 Posted December 29, 2013 Posted December 29, 2013 I would say so yes. He's hardly showing much interest in you. If he was genuinely interested in getting to know you he would be texting more and wanted to know how your Christmas was going. From a guys point of view I would say he only wants sex. I've been there and done it. Some girls I want to get to know. Some I'm only looking for fun with. If you like this guy you should go on the 2nd date and do the same thing, call it a night when you want to, make him wait. That way you will find out how long he's willing to wait around for you. If he does like you he will respect you for making him wait. If it's only sex to him then he will walk. That way you will know 1
RedRobin Posted December 29, 2013 Posted December 29, 2013 Most people (male or female) who are looking for a relationship don't respect those who get hammered drunk on their first meeting (maybe ever). My question to you... is why would YOU want a guy who can't seem to enjoy himself without getting inebriated and... wants to get you back to his place on the first date. I'd pass on the second date. Forget the 'make him wait' stuff... He's already shown his colors. He doesn't seem like a guy worth spending anymore time with if you are looking for a relationship. 5
d0nnivain Posted December 29, 2013 Posted December 29, 2013 I don't see where he was just looking for sex although everybody who is dating is looking for sex at some point. I just don't think he's into you at all . . . too much delay between contacts, too many last minute invitations with no planning / effort & he was late for the date. While I don't think he would have turned down sex, I think he didn't really care one way or another. 1
Author Serenityjojo Posted December 30, 2013 Author Posted December 30, 2013 Thanks for the feedback so far! While he did ask about my Xmas, I agree that the text messaging is much too infrequent. I don't take it personally as I think that's how he is in general which I really cannot tolerate. I'm going to take a pass on him...
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