deniable2150 Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 So I am 22, I was together with a guy for 3 years. He's very religious (on and off) and for the first year there was barely any touching. The reason I stayed is because I genuinely fell in love with him, even without all the affection. It was very strange! It slowly got better to kissing and holding hands. Lol. But by almost 3 years, it was boring, I felt so deprived of love/affection, I kept looking at other guys, it was just horrible. Then he was treating me bad, come Christmas I got him so many gifts and he literally got me nothing at all. Not even a card. I began to despise him because of everything put together. So I travelled to another state for 2 weeks to do a short thing for uni, while I was there I became very stressed out from studies, and low and behold, one of his old friends adds me on facebook and tells me he's cheating on me! At this point I am absolutely raging and crying, but I strangely just send him a text saying I just want to be friends. I didn't say what his friends told me. I felt he didn't deserve a call. So he replied, gladly accepting to be friends but saying he wants to keep in contact. I thought to myself, "really? how could he so easily accept it" By now, I'm just so built up with anger and emotions, I text him saying how much of a user he is and I hope I never see him again. He never replied to me ever again from that day. A week goes by, and his 'old friends' messaged me saying they were only playing a joke on him because he stopped talking to them and it was all made up. I instantly felt immense guilt for the way I reacted. I started texting him and calling him, to tell him what had happened. But he didn't reply, he doesn't want a bar of it. I told him what his friends did/said to me and either he's too afraid to respond or just doesn't care. He never replied, ever. So 8 months later I messaged him on facebook just to say how are you going? He replied a week later, saying I'm going well spending time with family and friends. Thats it, no how are you, or anything. So I try again to start up a conversation, I said I'm sorry for what happened, but it wasn't 100% my fault and I Hope we can still talk or just put it behind us so we can move on with closure/no hate. He doesn't reply, he just simply doesn't reply! Then I walk past him at the shops, he freaks when he sees me, STOPS in his tracks and goes to turn the opposite direction. He's so scared. But he just waved and kept walking. So in my dilemma, I want to achieve this; I want to talk to him to some degree so I can have closure. I need this. I am crying every 2-3 nights in regret, guilt, and missing him. If I'll never be with him again -fine. I just need this closure. I need to talk to him, or get something. The silent treatment, he had no reaction, no nothing. Just no reply. I can't handle not knowing what he thinks or feels. I just need to know, for my mental stability. Yes, I should move on, but no. I can't until I get something. someone please help me figure him out. 1. Is this complete silent treatment show he 'hates' me entirely, or he's pissed off, or scared? 2. I need to converse with him just once, even if he yells at me I will be happy.. so I can live my life with some closure.. Anger, happiness, scaredness, any kind of emotion from him will be enough closure for me. I just NEED to know what it is. Can you help me? (I know some will say just move on. Which I will be doing, after I find this closure. And I know some will say it is all my fault, thats fine I take 80% blame yes, but we've all made mistakes)
CrystalCastles Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 Silence is the closure of cowards. He is a coward. Silence is your closure.
BlametheIrish Posted December 28, 2013 Posted December 28, 2013 So you broke up with a guy who treated you like crap and ypu still want contact with him? You need a counselor not closure from him. You need to figure,out why you thought it was okay to stay in a relationship with a loser like that. Emptionally healthy people dont put put what you did. I could use this answer to so many questions posted on LS.
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