SameOldFear Posted December 27, 2013 Posted December 27, 2013 Hi, so we'll call this guy, "Steve." Anyways, my friends met Steve at a convenient store he was working at a few months ago. He had recently moved from Iowa and didn't have any friends, so we invited him to places with us. Well he liked two of my friends and then found out they were in relationships, but remained our friend. Steve became extremely clingy and needy. He went everywhere we went, eventually we started ignoring him. Well, I ran into him at the store and he asked me for my number. I'm trying to be his friend, hoping maybe I can be up front with him instead of abandoning him, because he seems really lonely, but I can tell he's trying to hook up with me and I'm really bad at telling someone just straight up, "No." But I know I'll eventually have to. But the weirdest part about Steve is everything about him seems like he shouldn't be so clingy and desperate. He's a fairly cute guy, he's really good at soccer and volunteer coaches little league, graduated last year top of his class, at a good college, good job, his own apartment, good singer and guitarist, and on his Facebook he has all sorts of friends from his previous home in Iowa liking and posting comments on his wall. It's so weird. Additionally, I was hanging out with him the other night and he pulled a gun out of his bag (unloaded) and then took the bullets out and put it in a drawer next to his bed. He told me it was just in case there was a break in. But it seemed so unnecessary to do. I don't know if he was trying to impress me or scare me, but either way it was such weird timing to be doing that. And he's never done anything particularly mean or wrong, but everything he says seems so insincere, like a salesman or something.
evagisele Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 Is all this good stuff---graduated top of his class, goes to a great school, etc...---even true? Say he is telling the truth about all that stuff; it doesn't mean that he still can't have insecurities, be mentally unstable, or even downright dangerous. I cut off communication with guy many years ago who was always trying to "sell" everyone on how great he was. He was in a PhD program at an Ivy League school. BUT, he was still mentally off balance and socially inept. He tried to latch onto anyone who showed him any attention. I don't know this guy you're talking about, but I would say go with your intuition. The longer you let this go on, the harder it will be to get him to leave you alone should you decide to distance yourself.
evagisele Posted January 1, 2014 Posted January 1, 2014 One more thing: honestly, the gun thing would make me nervous, especially within the context that he seems clingy and "weird." Even if he has a permit for it, blah, blah, blah...it would still make me uneasy. Go with your gut.
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