Short Guy

[MalachiX]

Ok, I couldn't find a motivational poster but I found an awesome de-motivational poster!

 

http://p.bfram.es/trying-is-the-first-step-towards-failure-kids-you-tried-your-best-an.jpg

[ThaWholigan]

Every time ......

 

There are difficulties for short men, but it's really not as widespread as made out. In fact, this wasn't even that much of a problem until the internet gave the topic a platform. My stepfather never had a problem with women and he's 5 foot 7. His son (my brother) is even shorter at around 5 foot 6. Many girlfriends and he's younger than me. I know plenty of short guys who do well with women, almost all of them.

 

Contrast that to me at 6 foot 3 who only lost his virginity last year . Trust me, being tall ain't exactly the elixir either! An advantage, sure. A guarantee? Not so much.

Some people are shallow - that's OK though. Not everybody can be deep.

 

--------------------------------------

 

OT - OP, I agree with Castle that if it is a soci etal problem for you, then you should really be trying to ignore it. Nonetheless, I understand that a lot of people are attuned to their social circles quite strongly and if it is an attraction factor for you then don't force it.

[edgygirl]

I'm one of those women who are into really tall guys, I admit. Like, I feel 6' for a man is okay but I really like 6'4 etc.

 

But even for me, when there's chemistry, everything changes. I made out yesterday with a really charming guy who is possibly 5'7 or 5'8 and I was HIGHLY attracted to him.

 

So... after all I think it does depend on how cute you are and if you carry yourself with confidence.

[ascendotum]

I seriously doubt any man would turn down a woman just because her breasts were too small or too big.

 

I find the analogies that some women use as being the equivalent of being short when it comes to effecting their prospects in the dating market to be a bit ridiculous. Having freckles, having size B boobs, being 5'10 or having curly hair does not wipe out near the same % of the opposite sex as does being short does for a guy. Guy's don't view such women as lower quality with those characteristics as many women do when it comes to smaller guys. The closer equivalent imo would be the overweight woman (of course though she can diet/exercise/take meds & supps to improve her image)

 

I'm average height, and to me 5'7 guy is not short. He is shorter than average, and will find it less easy than if he was on the other side of height spectrum. Below that and it starts becoming a definite negative trait for so many women, that a guy has to offset with other aspects of his personality/life to improve his prospects. An ordinary looking, unexciting lifestyle, introverted, short guy will struggle and just because he might end up with a gf/wife at some point does not erase the fact that he got ignored or rejected a lot, never had any NSA sex or spent long periods single and had to lower his expectations in a gf/wife.

 

I don't find it shallow by any means for a girl to prefer a guy that is bit taller than them. I think its shallow though when short girls reject short guys for their height. The thing is you can't tell someone at a personal 1 on 1 level that, because as some women here counter, "its just my preferences to prefer a much taller guy. That's just me and there are millions of other women there who can think otherwise." With the OP here, she has jumped past the guy's height when it comes to a attraction attribute, but is stumbling when it comes to how she thinks other people (more likely women I suspect) will view her for dating a short guy. A secondary negative aspect.

[lollipopspot]

I think its shallow though when short girls reject short guys for their height.

 

Why should the shortness of the female impact her preference in a male, in terms of being called "shallow" or not? It's not her fault she was born short either. It doesn't seem to me to be any more shallow if a short female prefers taller males than if a taller female does.

[somedude81]

I find the analogies that some women use as being the equivalent of being short when it comes to effecting their prospects in the dating market to be a bit ridiculous. Having freckles, having size B boobs, being 5'10 or having curly hair does not wipe out near the same % of the opposite sex as does being short does for a guy. Guy's don't view such women as lower quality with those characteristics as many women do when it comes to smaller guys. The closer equivalent imo would be the overweight woman (of course though she can diet/exercise/take meds & supps to improve her image)

 

I'm average height, and to me 5'7 guy is not short. He is shorter than average, and will find it less easy than if he was on the other side of height spectrum. Below that and it starts becoming a definite negative trait for so many women, that a guy has to offset with other aspects of his personality/life to improve his prospects. An ordinary looking, unexciting lifestyle, introverted, short guy will struggle and just because he might end up with a gf/wife at some point does not erase the fact that he got ignored or rejected a lot, never had any NSA sex or spent long periods single and had to lower his expectations in a gf/wife.

 

I don't find it shallow by any means for a girl to prefer a guy that is bit taller than them. I think its shallow though when short girls reject short guys for their height. The thing is you can't tell someone at a personal 1 on 1 level that, because as some women here counter, "its just my preferences to prefer a much taller guy. That's just me and there are millions of other women there who can think otherwise." With the OP here, she has jumped past the guy's height when it comes to a attraction attribute, but is stumbling when it comes to how she thinks other people (more likely women I suspect) will view her for dating a short guy. A secondary negative aspect.

I agree with absolutely everything.

[PJKino]

I think the point is yes women are shallow and vain as hell but dont complain about it or it will make things worse for you.

 

Love women for who they are on the inside but they will not do the same for you.These are double standards men have to live with

[MrCastle]

I find the analogies that some women use as being the equivalent of being short when it comes to effecting their prospects in the dating market to be a bit ridiculous. Having freckles, having size B boobs, being 5'10 or having curly hair does not wipe out near the same % of the opposite sex as does being short does for a guy. Guy's don't view such women as lower quality with those characteristics as many women do when it comes to smaller guys. The closer equivalent imo would be the overweight woman (of course though she can diet/exercise/take meds & supps to improve her image)

 

I'm average height, and to me 5'7 guy is not short. He is shorter than average, and will find it less easy than if he was on the other side of height spectrum. Below that and it starts becoming a definite negative trait for so many women, that a guy has to offset with other aspects of his personality/life to improve his prospects. An ordinary looking, unexciting lifestyle, introverted, short guy will struggle and just because he might end up with a gf/wife at some point does not erase the fact that he got ignored or rejected a lot, never had any NSA sex or spent long periods single and had to lower his expectations in a gf/wife.

 

I don't find it shallow by any means for a girl to prefer a guy that is bit taller than them. I think its shallow though when short girls reject short guys for their height. The thing is you can't tell someone at a personal 1 on 1 level that, because as some women here counter, "its just my preferences to prefer a much taller guy. That's just me and there are millions of other women there who can think otherwise." With the OP here, she has jumped past the guy's height when it comes to a attraction attribute, but is stumbling when it comes to how she thinks other people (more likely women I suspect) will view her for dating a short guy. A secondary negative aspect.

 

I think some of this is a little extreme. When I look at the men I know who struggle with women or who at one time struggled with women -- they're not all short. Some are average and some are even tall. There is no physical correlation between being bad with women and height. These men did have similar personality traits though -- introverted, bitter, shy, socially awkward, lacked social connections to meet women (i.e. Only a few friends, all of whom are male, a male dominated job, etc)

 

If it was as hard as some of you on here think it is for a short man to get a date -- this would be a much bigger issue and not one relegated to forums and online dating.

 

Do most women prefer a taller man? Sure. But a few things to be noted

 

1.) "Taller" is subjective and dependent on who's saying it.

2.) "Preference" means they would rather date someone tall, but it's not a deal breaker if he's not. They are capable of seeing everything the man has to offer and make their decision based on the whole of the man and not his height.

 

The ones you have to watch out for are the ones who say they only date tall men, or only date men over x height. These women are placing a physical limitation/filter on their dating prospects that you must pass before you can even get put in the running. Those women are shallow, but they are also a small group.

 

In short (lulz), most women prefer taller men, but most women date all kinds of men.

[Sand Man Dan]

At Sandman -- I live in New York. I've seen every romantic pairing you can think of. Also, in terms of physique, I'm skinny. Slight muscle definition -- but ultimately, more skinny than anything else. So it's not like I'm ripped or anything.

 

I was just being a pus5y earlier my bad

[BlametheIrish]

I think the point is yes women are shallow and vain as hell but dont complain about it or it will make things worse for you.

 

Love women for who they are on the inside but they will not do the same for you.These are double standards men have to live with

 

What a horribly jaded response. If women are so.much more shallow then why di you see pretty women.with ugly men often enough but rarely if ever a hoy guy dating an ugly women?

 

I think having specific taste and preferencr as to what you finfd attractive isnt universal to all people. It varies by the individual. I petsonally dont consider it vain that I'm more attracted to certain types of people, we cant help.what we find attractive. Its part of who we are.

Edited December 29, 2013 by BlametheIrish

[Imported]

What a horribly jaded response. If women are so.much more shallow then why di you see pretty women.with ugly men often enough but rarely if ever a hoy guy dating an ugly women?

 

I think having specific taste and preferencr as to what you finfd attractive isnt universal to all people. It varies by the individual. I petsonally dont consider it vain that I'm more attracted to certain types of people, we cant help.what we find attractive. Its part of who we are.

 

"Many" women have check list that include:

 

-How much $$ does the guy make?

-What career field is he in and how likey will he advance?

-Educated? (related to $$ earning potential)

 

Not hating, just saying being strong in your ability to provide will offset a lot of other "short comings" for guys.

 

I think women are right to be concerned here. Some guys are as well, but many are not.

 

Many guys....is she attractive? Do we get along? Will she be faithful?

 

And that's about it. We're not that complex. A girls money earning potential doesn't mean much to many guys.

 

Ugly rich girls? Pfft. Pass

 

I think Kanye West said it best

i ain't sayin she's a gold digger but she ain't messin wit no broke

Edited December 29, 2013 by Imported

[Sand Man Dan]

@imported

 

I disagree that women are all motivated by money. Most women I believe are motivated by emotion when choosing a partner. Men are motivated by beauty and like you said, faithfulness (in most cases). I think a man likes his woman to be flatly faithful, never so much as batting an eye towards the opposite sex, while women like to feel as though their man is promiscuous and could cheat if he wanted to, but chooses them and only them.

[Kate9292]

"Many" women have check list that include:

 

-How much $$ does the guy make?

-What career field is he in and how likey will he advance?

-Educated? (related to $$ earning potential)

 

What's wrong with wanting a guy who makes some money? You can't buy food or diapers with all the love in the world...

[Imported]

What's wrong with wanting a guy who makes some money? You can't buy food or diapers with all the love in the world...

 

Directly under what you read was

 

Not hating, just saying being strong in your ability to provide will offset a lot of other "short comings" for guys.

 

I think women are right to be concerned here. Some guys are as well, but many are not.

 

What's wrong with reading the whole post?

 

 

I have sisters, neices, cousins and I want them to have a happy life. This will generally take a man that is willing to put in the effort to make that **** happen.

Edited December 29, 2013 by Imported

[Kate9292]

And what's wrong with being a good provider being an advantage?

 

You say your not hating, yet I can sense some bitter undertones in your post.

[Sand Man Dan]

And what's wrong with being a good provider being an advantage?

 

You say your not hating, yet I can sense some bitter undertones in your post.

 

Seriously.

 

A man who has put in the effort to develop himself and push himself will likely be a good provider as a byproduct of such. Emotional health doesn't always go with this, but it does more often than with a man who has gone job to job the past ten years, or has been unemployed longer than a few months.

[Imported]

And what's wrong with being a good provider being an advantage?

 

You say your not hating, yet I can sense some bitter undertones in your post.

 

Sure, I guess I am a bit bitter here.

 

Just stuff like this that I find hard to swallow without speaking up

 

[ If women are so.much more shallow then why di you see pretty women.with ugly men often enough but rarely if ever a hoy guy dating an ugly women?

 

I just wanted to point out that a "hot guy" that only dates hot women is not any more shallow than a "hot women" that also dates an ugly dude. You'll find in most cases, that ugly dude is a solid provider. Most/many guys, hot or not, will provide for themselves and have no expectations of women providing for them.

[Lei Ping]

....and here I thought Randy Newman sorted this all out a generation or two ago....

[BlametheIrish]

Sure, I guess I am a bit bitter here.

 

Just stuff like this that I find hard to swallow without speaking up

 

 

 

I just wanted to point out that a "hot guy" that only dates hot women is not any more shallow than a "hot women" that also dates an ugly dude. You'll find in most cases, that ugly dude is a solid provider. Most/many guys, hot or not, will provide for themselves and have no expectations of women providing for them.

 

About half the men ive dated were average or ugly by socieites standards, and none of them made more than me (I'm not well off btw).

 

I really think women take personality into.considration more. Ive never dated a hot guy because he was hot and had no other redeeming qualities, but I cant tell you the amount of men I've seen do that.

[silicone]

I don't know what good it would do any short man to be "wary of it," just like I don't know what good it would do for a flat woman to hear how much more desirable curvy women are, and so on and so forth.

 

I really think your state of mind dictates a lot of what goes on in your life. I truly believe the reason I've gone 26 years without being rejected for my height is because I grew up believing it wasn't an issue.

 

Thinking in the back of your mind that every woman you speak to is secretly hoping you were taller or something is going to prevent you from forming healthy relationships with them. Insecurities like that damage relationships or prevent them from even forming.

 

I don't know what experiences you've had, but I would write those chicks off and laugh at what they missed out on, rather than sulking and thinking every woman out there feels the same as they do.

 

How tall are you?

[MrCastle]

How tall are you?

 

I answered that pages back. 5'7.

[MalachiX]

Every time ......

 

There are difficulties for short men, but it's really not as widespread as made out. In fact, this wasn't even that much of a problem until the internet gave the topic a platform. My stepfather never had a problem with women and he's 5 foot 7. His son (my brother) is even shorter at around 5 foot 6. Many girlfriends and he's younger than me. I know plenty of short guys who do well with women, almost all of them.

 

Contrast that to me at 6 foot 3 who only lost his virginity last year . Trust me, being tall ain't exactly the elixir either! An advantage, sure. A guarantee? Not so much.

 

I think you make a good point but I also think that just because some people are able to get passed this doesn't mean it's not a real issue for a lot of guys. I know there are lots of short men who do well but there may be some other reason for that and it doesn't discount all the other men who get rejected largely by their height (though I think this happens a lot more in OLD since women are actually looking at their stats rather than talking to a guy who they might have chemistry with).

 

Once again, I think we can agree this is a challenge without getting bitter about it. I think it's best to just tell yourself that you have an uphill battle and try not to let that stop your.

 

OH! I found another motivational poster which should be of help:

 

http://joelportman.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/barney-awesomesad.jpg

[Content]

I think you make a good point but I also think that just because some people are able to get passed this doesn't mean it's not a real issue for a lot of guys. I know there are lots of short men who do well but there may be some other reason for that and it doesn't discount all the other men who get rejected largely by their height (though I think this happens a lot more in OLD since women are actually looking at their stats rather than talking to a guy who they might have chemistry with).

 

Once again, I think we can agree this is a challenge without getting bitter about it. I think it's best to just tell yourself that you have an uphill battle and try not to let that stop your.

 

OH! I found another motivational poster which should be of help:

 

http://joelportman.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/barney-awesomesad.jpg

 

 

I think its mostly old,i find it hard to beleive that women are telling these guys in person that they cant date them because therye too short i think these guys are just looking for that as an excuse and maybe overrating other parts of themslves wheter physically or personality wise that might be turning off women.

 

As far as an "uphill battle" it depends who you are,most guys aside from really good lookign guys struggle at one time or another,tall blah looking guys arent surrounded by women either theyres only a small percentage of men who dont have to do much work to get women.

[somedude81]

Being short can be overcome by being very smooth with women.

 

Things start getting bad when the guy is short and is only as smooth as the average man.

 

Short + awkward = virgin for life.

 

A tall awkward guy will not have any issues unless his awkwardness is really bad.

[lollipopspot]

A tall awkward guy will not have any issues unless his awkwardness is really bad.

 

I think you are over-rating tallness.